For a short period of time I belonged to the Church of Jesus Christ of the Ladder Night Saints (LNS).
We were dunkers, and believed that the dead relative had to be immersed three times for the baptism to take effects. No baptism in effigy, no indeedy!
Since they bury people six feet under, you need a Ladder to get the body. We didn’t have our own Ladder, so we borrowed Jake’s.
You also need a couple shovels plus a couple hours undisturbed, which is why we shoveled at night. Anyways, after a couple of late night baptism, we schismed, and never had enough warm bodies to deal with another cooled one.
... a high White Horse Souce
LOL
and yet you have the name illuminati...