Posted on 12/22/2015 12:26:37 PM PST by ImJustAnotherOkie
DECEMBER 22--Angered by her husband’s repeated farting in bed, a Florida woman allegedly elbowed, kicked, and scratched her spouse, according to police who arrested her for battery.
Dawn Meikle, 55, is facing a misdemeanor charge following a 3:20 AM confrontation in the Port St. Lucie home she shares with her husband Donald.
As detailed in a December 11 arrest affidavit, Donald told cops that “while he was lying in bed he passed gas,†which prompted Dawn to begin “elbowing him on his arm.â€
When Donald’s flatulence continued, “Dawn began kicking him and eventually kicked him out of their bed,†police noted. Donald said that he eventually returned to bed, where he “passed gas again.†Not surprisingly, “Dawn began elbowing and kicking him again.â€
Donald said that he subsequently sought to restrain his wife, who repeatedly scratched him across his chest. Cops reported that Donald had four or five six-inch scratches on his chest, and that his t-shirt was ripped in three places.
During police questioning, Dawn said that she had “asked Donald several times to stop passing gas in their bed.†But when his flatulence persisted, Dawn admitted, she “began elbowing and kicking him.†Dawn suffered a bloody lip in the fracas, but she told police that Donald “was restraining me and somehow my lip got split open.â€
Dawn also told cops that while she was in the bathroom calling 911, she “sprayed pepper spray in the air to keep Donald out of the restroom.â€
Pictured above, Dawn was booked into the county jail on the battery charge. Free on bond, she is scheduled for a December 28 arraignment on the misdemeanor count. (2 pages)
Being single has its benefits
Come on a good marriage should be able to handle the occasional “Dutch Oven.”
Well, I don’t know about this exact instance, butt, for the record:
Shrapnel... why conventional spooning is always best.
To paraphrase former Washington, D.C. mayor Marion Barry, I’ll bet the ___ set him up — by feeding him beans or cabbage.
Farting is inevitable. Shaking the covers after farting in bed is just rude.
I can understand Dawn’s reaction. Dutch ovens can be brutal.
This is why having the “Fart Test” before marriage is crucial.
I may regret this but how does that test go?
If Dawn gets another man, she’s likely in for more of the
same or worse. She must sleep through her farts.
Even if you did not know you did it...you DID.
Own it, admit it, go forth.
And also realize that SHE has a time or two.
My wife is fairly delicate in her flatulence, but I've known some women in the Army that could literally gag a maggot.
When I was the 1SG of the 260th in Korea, a thousand years ago, I had a female PSG that could make the walls quiver and strong men jump out the windows.
I've provided just enough info that she would probably recognize herself, were she to read this...but no worries...she was damned proud of the fact that she could empty the whole building in a few minutes.
And totally destroy an entire formation of marching men.
She were NASTY!
Are you reading this...Helen?
You haven’t seen Donald. Must be a wimp to call the cops on some elbows especially when he was the one who kept farting on her. Seems to me she’s the victim. Let the cops put him in the back of their squad car and we’ll see how fast they kick him out.
He should have given her a Dutch Oven for good measure.
I blame the dog.
“So foul and fair a day I have not seen.” Dawn Meikle
“Fair is foul, and foul is fair: /
Hover through the fog and filthy air” Donald Meikle
Ping.
So much for sharing.
Required in pre-Cana counseling.
Tried. They don’t help
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