Suspect's Name: Norm Jacobs
Alias(es) or Nickname: Chief of Police
Race: Cracker
Gender: Metrosexual
Height: unknown
Weight: scrawny
Age (or DOB): unknown
Hair Color: Unknown
Hair Style: Shaved/Bald
Eyes: Full of shit brown
Suspect's Address: 100 State Street, 1st Floor
City, State, Zip Code: Beloit, WI 53511
Suspect's Cell Phone and/or Home Phone: (608) 364-6843
Scars, Marks, Tattoos: unknown
Suspect's Clothing: Replica Air force general's clown suit.
Dogs or Animals: Lets hope not!
Weapons: 40mm full auto, AK-47 ghost gun in his hip holster with banana clips that can shoot 6000 rds a second!.
Hangouts: Police station (see address). Also check the local union bar.
Known Associates: Union officals, thugs, limp-wristed liberals, et al.
Gang Affiliation: Democrat
Other Suspect Notes: "Funny looking"- i.e. Fargo movie Suspect's Employment Information: See address above. Where did you last see this suspect?: Comedy websites ALL over the interwebs
When (date and time) did you last see this suspect?
Today
Download photo of subject? Yes:
Additional comments: See? I told you he was funny looking. He looks like a child molester, so check his home computer also.