It would be interesting to know how much she did through back channels. Perhaps it wasn’t her style to be up front about things. None the less, I can see an argument for her doing things in the open, to make sure the perception you came away with, wasn’t the main take away from her years as Queen.
In retrospect she may fail on style points, referenced in this manner because that’s all it may wind up being when all is said and done, and the next leader’s style winds up being different.
Nothing has been canonized as for the King or Queen’s role, during her reign along these lines. At least, I’m not aware of it if it has been.
Perhaps the King to follow will be more outspoken. Ceremonial does have it’s advantages, not causing hostility. And I’m not sure butting heads would be all that productive. And if the King were to take strong public stands, that’s what it would ultimately lead to. And that could cause the King’s role to be diminished, him not being able to rule by edict, but to be subjected to an also ran position at the end of the day.
Perhaps the dignity of the court is thus strengthened by appearance, due to a non-confrontational stance. Admittedly it does cause the sovereign to be somewhat limited in power, but then that is by design is it not.
Edward VIII's abdication speech may interest you - specifically the bits I have bolded.
At long last I am able to say a few words of my own. I have never wanted to withhold anything, but until now it has not been constitutionally possible for me to speak.
A few hours ago I discharged my last duty as King and Emperor, and now that I have been succeeded by my brother, the Duke of York, my first words must be to declare my allegiance to him. This I do with all my heart.
You all know the reasons which have impelled me to renounce the throne. But I want you to understand that in making up my mind I did not forget the country or the empire, which, as Prince of Wales and lately as King, I have for twenty-five years tried to serve.
But you must believe me when I tell you that I have found it impossible to carry the heavy burden of responsibility and to discharge my duties as King as I would wish to do without the help and support of the woman I love.
And I want you to know that the decision I have made has been mine and mine alone. This was a thing I had to judge entirely for myself. The other person most nearly concerned has tried up to the last to persuade me to take a different course.
I have made this, the most serious decision of my life, only upon the single thought of what would, in the end, be best for all.
This decision has been made less difficult to me by the sure knowledge that my brother, with his long training in the public affairs of this country and with his fine qualities, will be able to take my place forthwith without interruption or injury to the life and progress of the empire. And he has one matchless blessing, enjoyed by so many of you, and not bestowed on me - a happy home with his wife and children.
During these hard days I have been comforted by her majesty my mother and by my family. The ministers of the crown, and in particular, Mr. Baldwin, the Prime Minister, have always treated me with full consideration. There has never been any constitutional difference between me and them, and between me and Parliament. Bred in the constitutional tradition by my father, I should never have allowed any such issue to arise.
Ever since I was Prince of Wales, and later on when I occupied the throne, I have been treated with the greatest kindness by all classes of the people wherever I have lived or journeyed throughout the empire. For that I am very grateful.
I now quit altogether public affairs and I lay down my burden. It may be some time before I return to my native land, but I shall always follow the fortunes of the British race and empire with profound interest, and if at any time in the future I can be found of service to his majesty in a private station, I shall not fail.
And now, we all have a new King. I wish him and you, his people, happiness and prosperity with all my heart. God bless you all!
God save the King!
The King (or Queen) of the United Kingdom cannot publically speak in opposition to their government, constitutionally. In any case where opposition exists, they must withdraw from the confrontation. Edward VIII could only speak his mind after he had abdicated, and even then he was circumspect and denied any dispute had arisen while he was King.
There is one exception to this - described by King George V in letters he wrote to his Prime Minister in 1913 and 1914. I won't quote them in full, but it was made clear that the King should only do so in a case where there was "convincing evidence it would avert a national disaster" and that it would be a "constitutional catastrophe" if that ever had to happen.
In private, it's a different matter - and indeed the advice I've just mentioned was given to Prime Minister Asquith privately, and really should never have become public knowledge in an ideal world. But publically, that's how it works.