Connecticut burglar steals one banana after driving into Citgo station

nydailynews.com ^ | january 12, 2014 | doyle murphy

[lowbridge]

Connecticut cops are looking for a brazen banana burglar.

The fruit thief used his station wagon to ram through the locked glass doors of a Citgo gas station in Newington, stole a single banana off the shelf and stood casually eating it inside the store before he drove away, police said.

“The male was not wearing a mask and made no attempt to conceal his identity,” police said in a statement.

[fieldmarshaldj]

When a brother wants a banana, he WANTS a banana.

[Yardstick]

Gotta admit a banana at peak ripeness is pretty tasty.

[jocon307]

“Hope they know how defend themselves if he attacks them with the banana.”

It’s OK, he already ate the banana.

It must have been like the store we were in once. Everything we wanted to buy, they didn’t have. We were like: why are we even in this store? Let’s leave and go to a better one!

[bigheadfred]

yeah well from one silverback to the other this looks like the usual suspect

[krunkygirl]

very funny!

i work at a very large, much in the news
lately, retail store. everyday we blow off
hundreds of dollars of profit just because the “guest”
challenges the price-—even if we can show that they are
wrong-—it’s all about customer relations...

this banana was nothing-—if only he would have asked!

now, the glass doorfront, that’s another story...

[MeshugeMikey]

ya gotta love the ID READY...on the sign just above his head...

[bigheadfred]

sounds like you are on TARGET

[oblomov]

He probably thought stealing a banana was the perfect crime. You can eat the banana, then throw the peel back at the people chasing you. They’ll slip, and you’ll get away scot free! At least, it worked that way in the cartoon.

[spokeshave]

He was in dire need of a single shot of potassium.

Maybe he needed some action after a low stress day as a navigator....

Looks like some of Holders people are happy navigators (HPN).....

HPN....OK whitey....lets check your voter registrations ....

HPN....Looks like you need to make a couple of adjustments here....

OK now I see it......your colonoscopy is scheduled for next month.....and the insulin will be mailed as before...

HPN Thinks...."this desk job sure beats stealing cell phones and a once a year gig patrolling voting booths with my billy club."

(He also got the message about hiding the screen image of his laptop)

[KittyKares]

Too funny. I would understand it more if he lived in Colorado and hadn’t yet learned to cope with the marijuana munchies.

[Mercat]

Mr. Mercat and I went to eat lunch at a grocery store that had a restaurant upstairs from the produce section. It was cool. We could sit there and watch the whole store. We saw a woman handle all the bananas. OK, fair enough. She wanted to find the perfect bunch but she ended up only taking one banana. She carefully wiped it off and put it between two bags in her cart. She then went to the grapes. She handled all the red grapes and chose one and wiped it off and ate it. Same with the white grapes. Then she wandered around the produce section a while longer and I told Mr. M, she’s going to steal that banana. It took her about another five minutes to work up her courage but then she slipped it into one of her bags and went to the exit, lifted both her bags out of the cart and went out into the parking lot. Dinner and a show.

[krunkygirl]

no, you are on Target!!

*laughing*

[Jack Hydrazine]

Who’s pocket is that coming out of? The attendant’s?

[krunkygirl]

No! I am a cashier-—it costs me nothing to
be accommodating to the “guest”;
that is a direct hit to Target’s bottom line...

kg/nancy

Target is in business to make a profit, BUT
they are keenly attuned to their customers
“happiness/good shopping experience”...
have to give them credit (...to a fault) for
that.

[skinkinthegrass]

“Hope they know how defend themselves
if he attacks them with the banana."attack him w/a hand of of berries.
obscure monty python reference. :-)

[dfwgator]

“S’pose he’s got a bunch.”

[Mastador1]

Obviously he had some serious munchies, so I’d say mary jane.

[skinkinthegrass]

"a bunch"well.. then attack him w/a pint (of berries :)..or a pointed stick.

[Render]

Worked at Target for 8 years. Gotta say I have a lot of great memories. One of the best companies I ever worked for.

[krunkygirl]

I love my job at Target -—
good people, good benfits (even though I don’t
qualify for most) and good work environment).

Yes, Target is a good company.

Just heard yesterday that they are closing 8
stores across the country-—one close to where
I live...makes me nervous...no one is immune to
this lousy, Obama economy!