1) Earlier in my life, I was a physicist. Of course after a (successful) thesis defense we are all issued baryon-number inverters.
2) I have been using mine to stockpile roughly a gram of anti-hydrogen every day since 1983 in a magnetic field controlled by a dead-man switch which I have been holding in my hand since that time. That amounts to roughly 11 kilograms of antimatter, which will annihilate to produce 90-100 megatons of very short wave gamma rays.
3) If a cop comes to my home to confiscate my guns, I will have to put down the dead-man switch to pick up my shotgun. 4) I can't be responsible for what happens after that...
Well...spoof or not, your posting probably just pinged a few metering devices to the redline at the NSA or some such spook ops. Hope you don’t have the antimatter stored over a certain super volcanic caldera!