This just doesn't sound romantic to me at all. It sounds so legalistic like you've laid down these demands, these twice a week, once a month quotas that she has to meet. I think if it was laid down like that to me, I wouldn't be in the mood either. Maybe she feels like when she puts the lingerie and the dress on, you're looking at her as more of an object than a person. She might feel like a player in a porn fantasy. Perhaps you could just sit back, be kind to her, and let her come to you in her time, even if it takes several weeks. If she feels like putting the lingerie and dress on aren't a demand but something that will make you and her happy, maybe she'll be willing. If not, perhaps you could see a counselor to help you work it out. One thing is for sure, porn is not the answer. It's dehumanizing and contrary to God's plan for humanity. It might make you happy in the short term, but in the long term, it's going to lead you down the wrong road.
Many if not most women love to wear this type of clothing because it accentuates their body and it makes them ALSO feel good to do so.
Men for the most part are not buying this lingerie their gf's/wives are.