Sufiism is the gentler form of Islam, yes, as it merged with Hindu Bhakti beliefs and practices, but do note that it does not repudiate the injuncts of the Koran to kill those who do not submit. that is the stumbling block. And even the best sufi communities lead to those who kill the infidels as part of their religion. The problem is islam. If we take the Bhakti form of hinduism, it does not have that baggage
Sufism is incredibly diverse. Various sects incorporated Hindu, Buddhist (most common), Manichean and even Zoroastrian attitudes and practices.
I do think it is relevant that the Koran orders Moslems to subdue everyone, not kill everyone. This is perhaps a fine point, but I think it is an important one.
Under sharia, conquered People of the Book (Christians and Jews) who are unwilling to convert are to be given freedom of religion on payment of tribute. Pagans who don’t convert are to be killed. In practice, Zoroastrians and even Hindus have been given People of the Book status for most of Moslem history.
It is equally relevant that the dhimmi status given to “protected” peoples is most easily compared to the status of American blacks under the worst of Jim Crow. They’re left alone most of the time, except when the masters get excited or in an ugly mood, as long as they “know their place.”
If they get uppity, bad things happen so they can be taught their place.
As under Jim Crow, crimes against dhimmi are seldom punished, certainly not equally to crimes against Muslims.