Posted on 11/01/2011 3:25:07 PM PDT by MindBender26
A public school teacher was arrested today at John F. Kennedy International airport as he attempted to board a flight while in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a compass, a ancient wooden device called a "slide-rule" and a calculator.
At a morning press conference, Attorney General Eric Holder said he believes the man is a member of the notorious Al-Gebra movement. He did not identify the man, who has been charged by the FBI with carrying weapons of math instruction.
"Al-Gebra is a problem for us," the Attorney General said. "Al-Gebra has terrorized many young people for years. They derive solutions by means and extremes, and sometimes go off on tangents in search of absolute values. They use secret code names like 'X' and 'Y' and refer to themselves as 'unknowns,' but we have determined that they belong to a common denominator of the axis of medieval with coordinates in every country."
As the Greek philanderer Isosceles used to say, "There are 3 sides to every triangle.'" When asked to comment on the arrest, President Obama said, "If God had wanted us to have better weapons of math instruction, he would have given us more fingers and toes."
White House aides told reporters they could not recall a more intelligent or profound statement by the President.
It is believed that another Nobel Prize will follow.
Mathematicians also set their underwear on fire.
Funny, Only geeks will get it.
Radicals! We must get to the root of the problem.
LOL
I hated the Al Gebra movement when I was growing up. But I survived it. :-)
The threat of Al-Gegra... real or imaginary?
Good work, FBI!!! However, I doubt he's in al-Gebra since al-Gebra militants don't need rulers, protractors and compasses.
We’ve gone off on a tangent here.
This could be the biggest threat we’ve faced since the rise of the Axis Powers.
Yeah with the leader Al Gore on loooose, still dangerrr!
Or a (01001100)year old father Father of (10)Geek and Grandfather of (01) Geeks.
Part of the axis of evil, along with the nefarious "Z".
That reminds me.....I need to get batteries for my abacus!
Re: Smart Ass
Got me through 7 years of undergraduate study !
:)
Don’t the government schools screen these people?
I caught on from the headline.
He tought students to solve their problems using radicals. What irrational behavior. One could draw a *parallel* to what the Taliban does, but you get the *point*. And they bombed their quizzes.
Thus, his terror came full circle.
I hear they will soon be into derivatives...
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