Posted on 05/29/2011 12:00:23 PM PDT by Excuse_My_Bellicosity
There are variations in driving styles on our roads and most motorists will fall into a distinct characteristic type depending on how they approach the task of driving. As you read through this list, you are likely to recognize yourself or someone you drive with.
Which driving character are you?
Nervous Nick: This driver lacks confidence in their driving abilities and is intimidated by traffic and highway speeds. The “Nervous Nick” will always drive at the speed limit or lower and will not accelerate enough to merge safely with highway traffic. They will display moments of indecision when it comes to driving options such as making left turns and when to proceed and how fast.
The Danger: They cause traffic to “rat pack” around them on highways. This leads to multiple lane changes and drivers becoming impatient and making dangerous choices or lane changes. Driving slower than the “flow” of traffic can cause traffic mayhem behind the slower driver as others must negotiate a way around the slow moving vehicle.
Middle Lane Mike: Will head from the on-ramp directly to the middle lane and plant them selves there no matter how slow they drive or who is sitting on their rear bumper. They are convinced this is the best lane to drive in and they are the safest drivers on the road.
The Danger: Traffic will pass on either the right of left sides of this driver causing traffic flow chaos. Large trucks will sit impatiently on their rear bumper trying to intimidate this driver into moving over. They are in danger of causing a crash or being rear-ended. Vehicles moving slowly in the middle lane are like a rock in a stream. They cause turbulence and in this case traffic turbulence.
Overconfident Owen or Arrogant Andy: These drivers are usually driving in an aggressive manner as they are very sure of their capabilities. They are usually speeding and changing lanes often. This aggressive driver feels they are more important than everyone else on the road. All other drivers are just in “their” way and should not be on “their” road.
The Danger: This driver has the confidence and sometimes even the driving talent that will allow them to handle their vehicle while speeding, but when things go wrong they lack the skills to recover or avoid an incident. This driver has confidence that far out strips their “driving smarts” and they make poor choices in their driving situations. They are usually driving too fast for weather and traffic conditions. They often drive an SUV or other large vehicle that adds to their sense of superiority. This driver will tailgate others and try different means of intimidation to get others out of their way. These drivers have been known to pass on the shoulder and lane hop. During the winter months, they are often found in the ditch.
Bored Bobby or Busy Betty: Usually found talking on a cell phone or chatting with passengers. Their mind will be focused on anything but driving safely. Even though they know the distraction of talking on the cell phone is dangerous, they feel their business is more important.
The Danger: This motorist is not paying attention to driving and invariably will end up crashing or cutting someone off. The “Bored Bobby” is just as dangerous as the other drivers on this list. They are not processing all their driving information that will help them make wise driving choices. They are driving distracted which is the leading cause of crashes. After being involved in a crash, they usually cannot figure out what happened.
Solo Sandy: This driver believes they are the only one on the road. They rarely check their mirrors and have no idea other vehicles are near or beside them. You may see this motorist heading down a highway with the only other vehicle in sight directly beside them or in front of them. Also known as “Blinder Billy” as they appear to have blinders on allowing them to only see directly in front of them.
The Danger: Not knowing what is around you in your driving environment is very dangerous. Each driver needs to know what vehicles are in their immediate vicinity to make intelligent lane or avoidance choices. This driver is often hoping others will yield to their lane changes. If they encounter a “Bored Bobby” or a “Busy Betty” the results are usually costly.
Immortal Ivan: Believes no matter what they do behind the wheel, nothing bad will happen to them. When people die in car crashes, it is always going to be someone else, not them. This driving symptom tends to come in the teenage years and can last into middle age if the driver makes it to that age. Too many car crashing video games can exacerbate the problem.
The Danger: Their fearlessness leads to very poor driving decisions and reckless driving. Many younger drivers and their passengers succumb to this syndrome. If “Immortal Ivan” survives, they often age to become an “Arrogant Andy”.
Dangerous Don or Silly Stevie: These drivers believe they know it all about driving. They have been on the road for a number of years and have survived. To them, their experience means they are the best drivers on the road. All those around them are morons or crazy. For drivers like “Dangerous Don”, their frustration with other motorists can lead to high risk driving and poor decisions.
The Danger: Their survival in many ways was a product of luck and not so much skill. One day that luck will run out and the resulting crash will be anyone else’s mistake and not theirs. They will blame the other driver, black ice or anything else since they could not possibly be at fault. Their closed minds mean they will never learn the skills that could keep them from that future crash.
Smart Susie: The rarest of drivers. Understands that driving is the most dangerous daily task they will face and prepares for it. This driver realizes they need to upgrade their driving skills to be prepared for the perils of driving. They focus on the task of driving and are always making driving easier for those sharing the road with them.
The Danger: There are not enough of these drivers on our roads!
Careful Cletus or Parade Patty- This driver has control issues in combination with cluelessness. He/she on a four lane highway with high truck volume will drive in lane 1 and match the traffic on lane 2 to within 2 mph, effectively blocking the entire highway if trucks are jockeying for position in lanes 3 and 4.
The danger : after 5 miles of this, even drivers not on the list will be at wits end and try one or more of the really stupid things described just to get around this special type of jerkoff.
I hate drivers that slow down on the freeway before they get to the exit... They start braking on the freeway instead of the off ramp...
And I agree, the skill of getting up to freeway speed and merging from an on ramp seems to be a lost art to many these days...
“Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?” - George Carlin
I call them, rich. If you run into them.
The biggest problem I sense these days with driving is the
problem that is part of a larger societal problem. Basically
it’s attention span. Before things got so digital and
multitasking I think people had no problem concentrating
on the task at hand. These days it’s just not possible for
many people and they need to be talking on the phone, texting, fiddling with the radio, eating, or doing whatever - just not focusing. I don’t think we as a society have the
attention span that we once had - and it shows.
At any given time I am one of each of these or a composite. The only one I’ve never been is Nervous Nick.
Also, to always be a Smart Suzie, you would have to be an incurable neurotic.
I actually do that quite often, especially on rainy days, but it is always because the person in front of me absolutely refuses to move over so I can pass and force me to pass on the right. Those are the times I wish my car was equipped with bazookas.
I’m pushing 80 in more ways than one ... my driving record is perfect ... and my insurance cost is incredibly low.
Meanwhile, there is one life-saving driving technique that I’d recommend.
If you drive an automatic transmission vehicle, train yourself to brake with your left foot. Given that, you will often find yourself close to riding the brake, and ... your emergency braking response time will be MUCH faster.
They totally ignore Drunk Davy or Stoned Susie, Illegal Ignacio, Glacial Granny and my personal favorite, the guy who speeds up and passes you on the left just so they can cut in front of you to take the next highway exit on the right.
>>idiots who think an on-ramp is their personal invitation to cut-in.<<
Actually, it is. The whole idea of merging traffic is that both sides cooperate with each other. I compare it to a zipper.
They left out “Defender of the speed limit” Dan. He drives exactly the speed limit in the Left Lane that everyone drive 10 over in. He always gets next to a Semi Truck going the speed limit so he can back up the lanes behind him. He will normally have an Obama sticker and thinks he is helping to save the planet.
>>I’m not sure whats happened in the last ten years but people have no clue what to do in a merge anymore. At least twice a month someone tries to pass me at the last second going into a merge and then decides not to and ends up forcing me to either floor it or slam on my brakes<<
Well, there are a lot more Asian drivers in the last ten years. ;)
“Oh and I drive a Silverado dually to work.”
Wimpy, compared to what you handle on your day job. Those are some mean machines - I gave up on hiring contractors to lay concrete and just started calling the trucks in myself. They are impressive vehicles when you stand next to them and they start flowing concrete.
>>Which one is the guy who charges through a red left turn arrow at the last moment even though oncoming traffic has already entered the intersection?<<
Robroy.
But to be fair, I don’t interfere with them. And it is because I live in an area where there is heavy slow traffic and a lot of Asian drivers. Doing what I do can get you in front of a pack of a hundred cars that you would have otherwise waited for, and I do not impede them one bit.
How about Latino Louie, the illegal alien without insurance always driving slower than the speed limit so as not to get pulled over?
That's the one that makes me yell out, "DIE!!!! DIE!!!!"
SOP calls for deceleration in the left lane w/blicker on, then lane change to suicie-lane, then apply brakes.
The aforementioned drivers usually come to a stop in the suicide-lane with their right-rear quater sticking out in the left lane traffic; that;'s just carnage waiting to happen.
I am popular Paul.
No matter what I do to stay as far away from everyone else on the road, folks flock to me.
I could be the only person on the road at 4 AM and within minutes I am in the middle of a pack of 12 vehicles
I speed up, they speed up, I slow down, they slow down.
I take the off ramp and go get a breakfast burrito, 3 of them follow me and chat me up while I am trying to drink my coffee.
Doh!
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