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N.J. Teen Seeks Dress Refund to Pay for Boyfriend's Funeral
myfoxny.com ^ | 5-22-11 | DIANA ROCCO

Posted on 05/22/2011 10:27:50 AM PDT by rawhide

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To: presently no screen name

The girl and her mother got $1200 store credit, which they can use. I am sure the girl will wear formal clothes in the future. I doubt she will shut all doors on life at age 16 because of the death of a boyfriend. Life and we, the healthy ones at least, go on.
A contribution to a memorial fund assures the contribution goes to the funeral expenses. A refund to the girl and her mother may or may not have gone to the funeral. Which leads me to ask, what 16 year old girl pays for her boyfriend’s funeral?
From the comments at the article site, there was a post that said local news had reported that the mother had tried to return the dress BEFORE the boy died. Another report said it was the morning after he died! If true, what’s up with that?

Formal wear for women does change by season and from year to year, especially the high end stuff. Colors, fabrics and styles go in and out of fashion. The store where I shop for my clothing carries limited editions, so that I am pretty much guaranteed that I will not see another dress like the one I am wearing at an event. I understand that when I buy something I have bought it and if the event is cancelled or whatever happens the dress is mine. I would never think of asking for them to excempt me from their stated policy.

And before you say I sound harsh, I assure you I can speak from experience on this issue. My fiancee was killed in a boating accident when we were 20. I did not help pay for his funeral and neither I nor my mother were at a store trying to get money back on a dress the next morning. We were with his parents as we all tried to understand what had happened and asking why.
Since that time, I have gotten on. I’ve married, had children, even been to more than a few formal events.


61 posted on 05/22/2011 12:08:44 PM PDT by kalee (The offences we give, we write in the dust; Those we take, we engrave in marble. J Huett 1658)
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To: rawhide
I'm a bit interested in this story as Diane & Co. is where I bought my prom dress about a decade ago. According to facebook, the father (who paid for the dress) was given a refund which he donated to charity since the Volpe family was not in need of financial assistance for the burial of their son.
62 posted on 05/22/2011 12:09:36 PM PDT by GenerationY
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To: presently no screen name

“They don’t want to give any profit away.”

They have rent, employees, etc. Why do you
decide how much profit they can make?


63 posted on 05/22/2011 12:12:36 PM PDT by kalee (The offences we give, we write in the dust; Those we take, we engrave in marble. J Huett 1658)
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To: kalee
I think the store has been generous.

I think so too. It looks like the girl and her mother are turds.

64 posted on 05/22/2011 12:14:57 PM PDT by Balding_Eagle
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To: Joe 6-pack
Yeah right. I'll bet if you look into it even further, you'll find she arranged the *accident* and had her boyfriend killed.

I wonder what she wore to the accident?

I recall an old episode of "The Courtships of Eddie's Father". Someone wanted the dad to do something he was not interested in doing, but the kid wanted him to do it. The dad was offered money to do it and he still said no. They then offered to donate the money to charity, and he still said no. He had to then explain to the kid about donating to charity because you want to, not because you are backed into a corner or blackmailed. It is not much of a stretch to see a similar situation here.

If the girl wants to make a donation, she should do so ... not put the arm on someone else.

65 posted on 05/22/2011 12:18:08 PM PDT by Mark was here (It's either Obama or America. There cannot be both.)
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To: Lonesome in Massachussets
Something’s askew when a girl who has $1200 for a prom dress dates a boy whose family cannot afford a decent funeral.

Yeah. The economy. We don't know the details on why, but sudden job loss, illness, or other problems can arise which put one heck of a kink in finances--not to mention losing a son.

Not having money at a bad time does not mean they are lowlifes, they may have had a setback--or a series of them.

If you have never had one, you should get down on your knees and thank God for that.

66 posted on 05/22/2011 12:24:12 PM PDT by Smokin' Joe (How often God must weep at humans' folly. Stand fast. God knows what He is doing.)
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To: rawhide

In the local Gannett newsrag online forum, that article got the most comments and responses of any in the past week. Priorities are askew.


67 posted on 05/22/2011 12:29:38 PM PDT by JimRed (Excising a cancer before it kills us waters the Tree of Liberty! TERM LIMITS, NOW AND FOREVER!)
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To: Smokin' Joe

See post 62.


68 posted on 05/22/2011 12:29:41 PM PDT by kalee (The offences we give, we write in the dust; Those we take, we engrave in marble. J Huett 1658)
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To: Mark was here
"If the girl wants to make a donation, she should do so ... not put the arm on someone else."

Going solely on what was presented in the article (and granting that the info may be incomplete or skewed), there is no legal issue. From a legal standpoint, the money clearly belongs to the store at this point, and she is SOL. The store is fully within its rights to tell her to go screw herself, and come back for another dress when she finds another prom date. Frankly, they are within their rights to seek a court order barring the girl from the store and have the sheriff's department come haul her out of there in handcuffs if she ever shows up there again.

My remark is that from a human decency standpoint (and from a marketing/business standpoint), they would be smart to, given the extreme emotional circumstances of the situation and the accompanying publicity, make an exception to their no returns policy, and give the girl a refund

69 posted on 05/22/2011 12:30:19 PM PDT by Joe 6-pack (Que me amat, amet et canem meum)
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To: Palladin
For $1200, they could have had a million dollars worth of good PR and goodwill.

With all due respect, had they done what many consider to be the "right thing", it would have been a non-story. Maybe a thank you letter-to-the-editor from the kid, if even that.

70 posted on 05/22/2011 12:35:30 PM PDT by JimRed (Excising a cancer before it kills us waters the Tree of Liberty! TERM LIMITS, NOW AND FOREVER!)
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To: kalee
I doubt she will shut all doors on life at age 16

Yeah, something the store didn't take into consideration - they lost her and her friends as customers. They aren't the only game in town.

A contribution to a memorial fund assures the contribution goes to the funeral expenses. A refund to the girl and her mother may or may not have gone to the funeral

A contribution in their name - good advertising and business expense. Win/win for the retailer.

So, now we are assuming the girl is a liar and the store somehow cares more what she does with the money than what they are losing in their eyes. RIGHT! Like they want to keep her honest. LOL!

Which leads me to ask, what 16 year old girl pays for her boyfriend’s funeral?

Her contribution to help his family? We can't speculate what his family has or not. It's what she wants to give is what we know.

Another report said it was the morning after he died! If true, what’s up with that?

Propaganda for a purpose? Not shocking. I'm sure her friends would not take on this mission if it was before. Surely, you could have thought that through on your own, no? Or making her look like a liar was more fun?

so that I am pretty much guaranteed that I will not see another dress like the one I am wearing at an event.

So - neither will the one buying the dress she returned.

I didn't say formal wear doesn't change - I said that drastic - we aren't talking high society here!!

I did not help pay for his funeral and neither I nor my mother were at a store trying to get money back on a dress the next morning.

Well what do you know - you have a different experience than her!! Before it was uniqueness in a dress - now you want her experience to be like yours - amazing!! Sorry at 20, you didn't have a prom dress for you and your mom to return. How sad. No wonder you can't relate.

We were with his parents as we all tried to understand what had happened and asking why.

You are making major assumptions here. Who said she didn't do above and beyond what you did - as you seem to want to come off so righteous!! Or do you enjoy reliving the whole event and need to post how you grieved with no thought about a dress or anything. Surely, you are a much better person than she is - you made that clear.

Since that time, I have gotten on. I’ve married, had children, even been to more

It's nice to see you aren't sixteen or twenty still- and you did what ANYONE else does - if you are living - they go on. Nothing unique here.

It would be nice to remember - your personal experience is your's and everyone has their own. This girl has HER'S - comparing yourself is a teenage mentality.
71 posted on 05/22/2011 12:39:52 PM PDT by presently no screen name
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To: Smokin' Joe

I can see that, but a funeral probably doesn’t cost as much as a prom. Despite my Freepname, I didn’t attend either of my proms because I didn’t want to spend that kinda money on a date. I wouldn’t have had any problem getting a date, but I would have had to have paid for it myself. I suppose if my folks were putting up the dough...

I’m just at a loss to understand how people can spend $1200 on a dress for a dance and then claim they can’t find the dough to bury a loved one. None of this makes any sense.


72 posted on 05/22/2011 12:39:54 PM PDT by Lonesome in Massachussets (Somewhere in Kenya a village is missing its idiot)
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To: kalee

Show me where I decided. And for you to say what is common knowledge - comes off like you feel the need to educate here. You previous email - was how much better you handled the situation in your grief. You REALLY need to get over yourself! Some where you are stuck and didn’t move on like you think.


73 posted on 05/22/2011 12:43:55 PM PDT by presently no screen name
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To: Perdogg

Exactly. It is not Diane & Co.’s problem if her boyfriend died. They’re in the business to sell clothes & dresses.
Although, if I were the store’s owner, I’d make a donation just to make for good PR. The owner might lose some business anyway.


74 posted on 05/22/2011 12:54:59 PM PDT by SilvieWaldorfMD
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To: SilvieWaldorfMD
"It is not Diane & Co.’s problem if her boyfriend died. They’re in the business to sell clothes & dresses."

I'd be willing to wager they were all interested in her personal life, her boyfriend and her hopes and dreams when they were making the sale.

75 posted on 05/22/2011 12:58:45 PM PDT by Joe 6-pack (Que me amat, amet et canem meum)
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To: Joe 6-pack

Doubtful, she was a sale, nothing more.
Have you ever run a busiuness?


76 posted on 05/22/2011 1:05:47 PM PDT by kalee (The offences we give, we write in the dust; Those we take, we engrave in marble. J Huett 1658)
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To: kalee

You were the one seemed to think every cent they received on the dress was profit. I just pointed out it’s not. They have overhead besides paying the the dress supplier.


77 posted on 05/22/2011 1:07:46 PM PDT by kalee (The offences we give, we write in the dust; Those we take, we engrave in marble. J Huett 1658)
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To: All
She bought her $1,200 dress...

More money than brains. Let this be a lesson, young lady.

No refund should be given. No boycott should be held.

78 posted on 05/22/2011 1:13:00 PM PDT by newzjunkey (If it's Palin, the question becomes does Obama best Reagan's 49 state sweep.)
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To: kalee
"Doubtful, she was a sale, nothing more. Have you ever run a busiuness?"

What's a 'busiuness'? Why is it relevant if I've ever run one?

79 posted on 05/22/2011 1:14:36 PM PDT by Joe 6-pack (Que me amat, amet et canem meum)
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To: presently no screen name

I never held muyself up as more righteous than she. I moved on and hopefully so will she. If not she needs help.
The article and comments at the article site stated that she or her mother attempted to return the dress either before he died or the morning after, not her friends. I can read and I have run a business.
The world does not center around her or her missed prom any more than it centered around me and my missed wedding.

Anyway it is all moot, the store apparently refunded to her father and he has donated it to charity because the boy’s family does not need help with the funeral expenses.


80 posted on 05/22/2011 1:14:38 PM PDT by kalee (The offences we give, we write in the dust; Those we take, we engrave in marble. J Huett 1658)
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