'I'd kill myself first!' John Edwards 'suicidal' over facing jail, claim pals

UK Daily Mail ^ | 4/6/11 | Daily Mail Reporter

[DCBryan1]

Dead, you need to photoshop John Edward's head onto Jon Voight's face with the caption, "Mr. Edwards, you shore dew hava purty mouf".

[YHAOS]

"I won't go to jail. I'd kill myself first"

Don't talk about it. Just do it!

[gitmogrunt]

Hey John,according to my Drill Instructor...sympathy can be found in the dictionary somewhere between "sh#t and syphllis" I hope this helps!

[dfwgator]

Yeah, it’s just another empty promise from John.

[Snardius]

He’s going to Federal pound-me-in-the-a$$ prison...

[chuckee]

Looks like John is headed to one of his two Americas, the one with bars on the door. Don’t drop the soap, John!

[Lonesome in Massachussets]

Sounds like another empty promise from a Democratic politician.

[dead]

There's two Americas:

• Free America
• Incarcerated America

[GotMojo]

Edwards Cell Mate: “let’s play house....you want to be the Momma or the Papa?”
Edwards: “I’ll be the Papa!”
Edwards Cell Mate: “OK, Papa, come over here and bend over for Momma”

[trisham]

Wow! 20 pounds. Unbelievable. Give me a break.

[null and void]

And?

[DCBryan1]

"I'd kill myself first!"

bye bye.

[Defiant]

Just looked it up on IMDB. Same guy. He’s in a show called “Outsourced” now. I also hear his voice on all kinds of animated shows. I never did see Office Space, but had intended to when it came out.

[Servant of the Cross]

That surely helps to explain why No Excuses repeatedly portrays Edwards as a hyper-ambitious phony. Nowhere is that clearer--and more startling--than in a passage recounting Kerry's first meeting with Edwards during the summer 2004 running-mate selection process. Kerry had qualms about Edwards from the start, Shrum writes, but grew even queasier about Edwards after they met. Edwards had told Kerry he was going to share a story with him that he'd never told anyone else--that after his son Wade had been killed, he climbed onto the slab at the funeral home, laid there and hugged his body, and promised that he'd do all he could to make life better for people, to live up to Wade's ideals of service. Kerry was stunned, not moved, because, as he told me later, Edwards had recounted the exact story to him, almost in the exact same words, a year or two before--and with the same preface, that he'd never shared the memory with anyone else. Kerry said he found it chilling, and he decided he couldn't pick Edwards unless he met with him again.

[nina0113]

He'd be my b***h.

Please tell me even YOU wouldn't hit THAT.

[dfwgator]

“’I’d kill myself first!’

"Hey man, nice shot."

[Alberta's Child]

The 57-year-old former Presidential candidate reportedly told a close friend: "I won't go to jail. I'd kill myself first!"

If that's the case, may it be a spectacular demise that gets lots of media coverage, harms nobody else, and costs the taxpayers almost nothing to deal with the aftermath.

[laweeks]

It would be mostly “yeah butts”

Edwards Cell Mate: “let’s play house....you want to be the Momma or the Papa?”
Edwards: “Yeah butt”
Edwards Cell Mate: “OK, Papa, come over here and bend over for Momma”
Edwards: “Yeah butt”
Edwards Cell Mate: “Wow! You have nice Breck hair!”
Edwards: “Yeah butt”

[Do Not Make Fun Of His Ears]

“Well....as long as it’s the National Enquirer!!”

The National Enquirer were the ones who broke the story of his affair. You know that was true. Right?

Also, Jesse Jackson’s affair.

They have a damn good track record of late. this isn’t the National Enquirer of the 70s.

[null and void]

There's two Americas:

• Free America
• Incarcerated America

Where is this "Free America" of which you speak?