What? You’re a Wisconsinite and you don’t have an asparagus patch? I suppose you shun rhubarb as well? I will admit it’s not very good pickled. :)
I’ll have you know that I’ve cut up more rhubarb than I care to remember. We have limited garden space, and if it was a choice between asparagus and Winter onions, which it’s not, the onions win. ;^)