So long as I serve with these crew members:
I’ve served on fast attack subs and ballistic subs. I have no words to express how absurd I think that the idea of women serving on subs is. It is bad enough now having women serve in the Navy. As a retired senior officer, I had to deal with the fact that women have a far higher absentee rate than males due to “hormonal” problems. The pregnancy rate, even among officers, is a huge problem. Most of them are single mothers. Every ship on which I served with women would make the love boat look tame. There is more screwing going on in a mixed crew auxiliary ship in the Navy than in a Bangkok brothel. I can’t even begin to list the number of divorces I have had to deal with over these mixed crew experiments. It is one gawd awful mess. What is really and truly aggravating is that if you want to make a career out of the Navy, you don’t dare say anythingnegative about women serving in the Navy. It you do, you’ll never get promoted.
We alreafy have Baby Boomers.
Soon we will have Boomer Babies.
The list, ping
Well, as long as they paint all the subs bright pink...I have no problem with it. *SNORT*
You guys thought we lost scores of excellent military leaders during the Carter & Clinton years?
As Dear Leader says, ‘You ain’t seen nothin’ yet!”
(Retired Army, ‘77-’97.)
Submariner PING
Bring back Submarine Races...
PC over practicality, discipline, efficiency, tradition, etc.
The Kenyan Clown intends to destroy our military.
Women on submarines: a liability.
A submarine is supposed to be quiet underwater. One unexpected noise, whether it’s a cup dropped off a table, a wrench or the female submariner moaning can mean death for everyone on the sub.
Brings new meaning to the old joke about the definition of a Submarine?
A Boat that leave port with 90 Sailors and comes back 6 months later with 45 couples.
I hope no-one has posted this yet (I didn’t scroll the whole thread).
Life Aboard A Submarine…
If you have never served aboard a submarine or do not know anyone who is or was a submariner, then this list may help you understand what life aboard a submarine is all about (Well..sort of anyway.) If you are a submarine veteran, you will probably find much to laugh about in the unique world of submarine life. These are but a few of the ways to experience (on the lighter side) life aboard a submarine. These are but examples, used for reference only, not for actual demonstration purposes. Read at your own risk.
Spend as much time as you can indoors during the daytime, stay out of direct sunlight. Go to work only before sunrise and come home after sunset.
Paint everything around you Sea Foam Green (Navy NSN Green, no substitutions) or Off-White to be sure you are living in a clean, happy environment. Every Friday, set an alarm on loud for a short, but hated, drill sound. Then get up and manned only with a bucket, sponge and a greeny. Clean one area over and over, even if it is already spotless.
Eat food that you can only get out of a can and requires water in order to eat it. Empty out your refrigerator and turn the temperature control down, turning the refrigerator into a freezer. Get rid of all fresh fruits and vegetables.
Repeat back everything spoken to you. Repeat back everything spoken to you.
Sit in your car for six hours at a time with the motor running. Keep hands on the wheel. But don’t leave your driveway. Log readings of your oil pressure, water temperature, speedometer and odometer every 15 minutes.
Put Lube Oil in your humidifier instead of water. Set it on high.
Buy a trash compactor; use it only once a week. Store the rest of the garbage in your bathroom.
Don’t watch movies except in the middle of the night. Have your family vote on which movie to watch, then show a different one.
Have the paperboy give you a standard Navy haircut.
Take hourly readings on your water and your electric meters. But only for a six hour period.
Sleep with your dirty laundry.
For you old mechanics, set your lawn mower in the middle of the living room while it is running. Only for six hours a day.
Invite guests but don’t prepare enough food for everyone. Serve food cold. Limit the time they sit at the table to 10 minutes.
Wake up at midnight every night and make a peanut butter sandwich, use stale bread. Better yet, make your own bread but cut 3 inch thick slices and use these. Optional: warm up some canned Ravioli or soup.
Make your family a menu for the week without knowing what food is in the cabinets.
Set your alarm clock for various times at night; adjust the volume to the maximum. When it goes off, jump out of bed, get your clothes on as fast as you can, run outside and grab the garden hose. Then go back to bed and do it all again when the alarm goes off.
Once a month take apart every appliance completely and then put them back together.
Use 18 scoops of coffee per pot and allow it to sit for 5 to six hours before drinking it.
Invite at least 85 people you really don’t like and have them stay for a couple of months.
Store your eggs in the garbage for two months and then cook a dozen each morning.
Have a fluorescent lamp installed under your coffee table and lie underneath it to read books.
Put a complicated lock on your basement door and wear the key around your neck on a special chain.
When making cakes, prop up one side of the pan when cooking. Use extra icing to level it off.
Every so often, yell “EMERGENCY DEEP!” run into the kitchen and sweep all pots, pans and dishes off of the counters onto the floor, and then yell at your wife for not having the kitchen area “Stowed for Sea!”
Put on the stereo headphones (don’t plug them in), go to the stove and stand in front of it. Say (to no one in particular) “Stove manned and ready” stay there for 3 to 4 hours. Say (once again and to no one in particular) “Stove secured”, then role up your headphone cord and put them away.
Pull out your refrigerator and clean behind it for 4 hours and then put it back when you are done. Have your wife come and check every 10 minutes with a flashlight to see how you are doing.
When doing your laundry fill it only 1/3 full, sit in front of your washing machine in your underwear and read a book or magazine you’ve read at least 5 times before in the last week. When the wash is done, only run the dryer for half the normal time.
Fix-up a shelf in your closet that will serve as your bunk for the next six months. Take the door off of the hinges and replace them with curtains. While asleep, have family members shine a flashlight in your eyes at random intervals and say either “Sign this!” or “Sorry, wrong rack!”
If you can do these. You can do just about anything!
There aren’t enough single, pregnant women in the Navy?
So long as I serve with these crew members: