I'm gonna tell 'em I have 13 illegal immigrants living with me. And then ask them if they count.
LOL Demand that they count. Threaten a discrimination lawsuit. Ask for a bail out. Claim diplomatic immunity and declare your property a foreign embassy and warn them that U.S. authorities can't trespass. Oh, and tell them one of your aliens is an Aztec shaman which gives you special religious protections and status as an international archaeological site by UN treaty.
Make it clear than any further contact by the U.S. government, that isn't accompanied by large quantities of unmarked bills, will be treated as a major insult by several third world countries.