Re: kids and trophies. My kids have a bunch of those stupid trophies from participating in sports. They are on a table in the basement family room......the room where the children are allowed to play dodgeball. Those trophies have been broken to bits, and the kids don’t care. They know that they did nothing to earn them, so the trophies have no value.
We are emphasizing that self-esteem has to be earned through hard work. It is ok if they work really hard at something and fail. We still praise the effort. That is life. Sometimes you work really hard at work, and you don’t get the promotion, you still need to take pride in the fact that you did your best. But I can be pretty cutting when I know they did a half-a$$ed job to begin with. No points for showing up. I’m wondering if my children are going to need therapy when they grow up......
Well, they’ll be in therapy, but at least they’ll be self-sufficient!
This year, my oldest son’s CYO Varsity basketball team has been undefeated and they have won all four of the tournaments they have played. The trophies from these wins (and my other son’s Pinewood Derby Car win) hold a place of honor, while dozens of “participation” trophies have been chucked in a box in a closet. The kids do know the difference, which is encouraging. I don’t understand why the coaches still waste money on the “participation” trophies. Throw the kids a pizza party for their effort instead - it will mean more to them!
One of the things I have been pondering as I read this book and watch events unfold in real life, is the direction to encourage them in considering future careers. I want them to be “producers” - but I don’t want their production to be exploited by the “looters”. My 10 year old is interested in both alternative fuel and in water purification - both very productive, but very exploitable. What would John Galt say?