Al-Qa'eda in Iraq alienated by cucumber laws and brutality

The Telegaph UK ^

[WilliamReading]

Should women be allowed to buy cucumbers and bananas? And should men be allowed to buy tomatoes, and other suggestive vegetables?

Food for thought.

[SolidWood]

"They even killed female goats because their private parts were not covered and their tails were pointed upward, which they said was haram.

"They regarded the cucumber as male and tomato as female. Women were not allowed to buy cucumbers, only men."

Other farcical stipulations include an edict not to buy or sell ice-cream, because it did not exist in the time of the Prophet, while hair salons and shops selling cosmetics have also been bombed.

"I saw them slaughter a nine-year old boy like a sheep because his family didn't pledge allegiance to them."

You can't make this stuff up. They are sexually confused, goat-humping freaks. San Francisco Queens gone berserk... Sheesh, if it weren't so bloody barbarian, it would be the greatest live-comedy show.

[R. Scott]

They include a ban on women buying suggestively-shaped vegetables, according to one tribal leader in the western province of Anbar.

Man! Talk about dirty minded perverts!

[snowrip]

Sheikh Hameed al-Hayyes, a Sunni elder, told Reuters: "They even killed female goats because their private parts were not covered and their tails were pointed upward, which they said was haram.

"They regarded the cucumber as male and tomato as female. Women were not allowed to buy cucumbers, only men."

Other farcical stipulations include an edict not to buy or sell ice-cream, because it did not exist in the time of the Prophet,

And they wonder why they are the butt of jokes from Detroit to Dubai. I also wasn't aware that AKs and IEDs were, in fact, around during the time of the Prophet.

[ikka]

"They regarded the cucumber as male and tomato as female. Women were not allowed to buy cucumbers, only men."

Imagine if there was a Dunkin Donuts beside a place selling cucumbers ... they'd go berserk! (Or at least, even more berserk than they already are...)

[happinesswithoutpeace]

They had outlawed smiling in Afghanistan prior to 9-11.

0_-

Seriesly...but I doubt anyone noticed.....

[Allegra]

They're not all wiped out yet, but they're pretty much going extinct here.

However, I was just outside a few minutes ago and heard one of their "calling cards" go off. I pray it was yet another failure (they've had quite a few lately) and that nobody was hurt.

They'll be caught. The citizens just aren't putting up with AQ's crap anymore.

[poobear]

I'm going to side with the “Church Lady” on this one. Can you say SATAN?

These guys are possessed! They don't even qualify as animals!

[Ditto]

Food for thought.

I also wonder if a goat is aware that it has "private parts." ;~))

[stefanbatory]

so who would be allowed to buy the Veggie Tales videos for the kids then? It stars Larry the Cucumber and Bob the Tomato...

[reagan_fanatic]

They even killed female goats because their private parts were not covered and their tails were pointed upward, which they said was haram.

These people can't be serious.

[WilliamReading]

I have a cat, who likes to lie on her back, with her hind legs all spread. Even I think that sort of behavior is unseemly.

[WilliamReading]

so who would be allowed to buy the Veggie Tales videos for the kids then? It stars Larry the Cucumber and Bob the Tomato...

That wouldn’t be a problem at all. The woman could buy the tomatoes, and the men could buy the cucumbers. You just have to think outside the box a little bit.

[aruanan]

Women were not allowed to buy cucumbers, only men.

That's appropriate, considering Al-Qa'eda.

[Rennes Templar]

Should be: “They regarded the cucumber as male and tomato as female. Women were not allowed to buy cucumbers, only (straight) men.”

[<1/1,000,000th%]

What are the terrorists going to do when they discover that ordinary Iraqis won’t give up even the limited freedoms they now have?

[SoKatt]

I can’t read this without thinking of the scene in “This Is Spinal Tap” where David St. Hubbens pulls the foil-wrapped cucumber out of his trousers.

[railroader]

Other farcical stipulations include an edict not to buy or sell ice-cream, because it did not exist in the time of the Prophet, while hair salons and shops selling cosmetics have also been bombed.

That's funny, IED's didn't exist in the time of the prophet either :)

[Bobalu]

It’s like these loons are living inside a Monty Python skit.