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To: dirtboy
Wonder who they are going to get to play you? hehehe...

I would guess Dr. Evil.


15 posted on 07/22/2008 8:05:43 AM PDT by Always Right (Was it over when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor?)
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To: Always Right
Before I was outed, Peter Wallsten of the LA Tmes (who was the guy who eventually figured it out) e-mailed me through FR asking about my background. I sent him this:
The details of my life are quite inconsequential.... Very well, where do I begin? My father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low-grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery. My mother was a 15-year-old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet. My father would womanize; he would drink. He would make outrageous claims like he invented the question mark. Sometimes, he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy. The sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament... My childhood was typical: summers in Rangoon... luge lessons... In the spring, we'd make meat helmets... When I was insolent I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds — pretty standard, really. At the age of 12, I received my first scribe. At the age of 14, a Zoroastrian named Wilma ritualistically shaved my testicles — there really is nothing like a shorn scrotum — it's breathtaking... I suggest you try it.
I wonder if he was amused. I felt sort of like Larry the Cable Guy: I don't care who you are, that right there is funny. But it did not make it into any of the stories, at least that I can recall.

If the movie is based on Mapes' book, it will be a gigantic collection of lies and delusions.

38 posted on 07/22/2008 9:03:24 AM PDT by Buckhead
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