Time for Shaq to Give One Back

North Star Writers Group ^ | June 26, 2008 | Nathaniel Shockey

[Invisigoth]

In case you missed it, Shaquille O’Neal received an honorary badge from the U.S. Marshals in September 2005, and was made a special deputy in 2006 by Maricopa County Sheriff Joe Arpaio. That’s four NBA titles, one college degree (which he completed in the middle of his NBA career) and two badges, all for the same guy who has already completed more than one man’s fair share of Icy Hot commercials.

But Shaq, Shaq, Shaq, it’s time to give one back.

It seems as though he was caught on tape rapping in a club somewhere, and his language was not exactly police-worthy. Unfortunately for Shaq, Joe Arpaio wants his two badges back.

Here are a few highlights from the most recent Shaq attack:

You know how I be . . . last week Kobe couldn’t do without me . . . ain’t nobody in the world do it bigger than me . . . that’s like a white boy tryna’ be more nigga’ than me . . . that’s the difference between first and last place . . . Kobe nigga’, tell me how my ass tastes . . .

[DieHard the Hunter]

I thought he had more class than that. What a buffoon.

[Izzy Dunne]

I thought he had more class than that.

LOL!

You must be kidding.

[DieHard the Hunter]

> You must be kidding.

Forgot my /s tag I guess...

[samson1097]

The biggest problem I had was how terrible a rapper he was on the video. Garbage. (And I don’t mean trashy, though it applies. He kind of sucked.)

[steelwheels]

I thought he had more class than that.

What planet have you been living on?

[normy]

It’s pretty funny though on paper.

[DustyMoment]

You know how I be . . . last week Kobe couldn’t do without me . . . ain’t nobody in the world do it bigger than me . . . that’s like a white boy tryna’ be more nigga’ than me . . . that’s the difference between first and last place . . . Kobe nigga’, tell me how my ass tastes . . .

Well it's certainly vulgar. But, I'm wondering where the Revs. Sharpton and Jackson are to climb all over him for using the "N" word. Isn't that supposed to be the worst word that can be used for African-Americans?

Tch, tch, tch, tch, tch. Shaq, you should have kept your ugly thoughts to yourself.

[GreenAccord]

Let’s see where this goes, but I’m not so sure that a police officer, when off duty, should be held to a different standard then a regular citizen. Now there may be an official code dictating this for a policeman when they are off duty, but even so, was Shaq subject to this code?

And for the record, yeah, I think rap is awful and not entertaining and often demeaning and so on, but if it’s improper for him to rap in his own way, why is ok for anyone to rap in such a manner?

[RichInOC]

Uh, big man...Kobe and the Lakers might not have won the NBA finals without you. Yet. On the other hand, at least Kobe and the fellas were IN the finals this year.

[normy]

Yeah but Shaq got him a ring without Kobe. As a Mavs fan I blame the refs though. ;)

[lonestar]

It’s pretty funny though on paper.

You have a weird, immature sense of humor.

[normy]

Well if you follow basketball and the Kobe/Shaq feud, it's funny how angry Shaq still is at Kobe. You're right though, I probably do have a weird sense of humor and it might be immature to. I think Adam Sandler and Vince Vaughn movies are hilarious.

[DieHard the Hunter]

> What planet have you been living on?

(grin!) Like I said in #4...

Here in New Zealand we ration our /s tags: they go up in price every day because they are indexed to the cost of gasoline. So we use them sparingly, particularly on forums such as the FRee Republic.

Naturally, in good times one liter of petrol buys alot of sarcasm, because laughs are cheap. But as the price of petrol goes up, so drops the exchange rate in sarcasm: it gets beyond the point of NOT FUNNY at US$4.00 per gallon.

(We are paying NZ$2.25 per liter. A liter is just under two pints...)

Currently, one liter of petrol (”gasoline”) trades for ten (10) /s tags, because the price of petrol is NOT FUNNY, way beyond a joke.

If the Iraq War is really a “Blood-for-Oil” issue like the Left says it is, then it would be most appreciated if you Yanks could please send some of the war spoils DownUnder without further delay. The sense-of-humor of an entire South Pacific Nation is at stake...

[RichInOC]

I think Sir Charles’ kid Dwyane might have had something to do with that ring.

:-D )))

And Pat Riley probably didn’t hurt at all, either. Let me think. Where’d that guy use to coach? Oh, yeah...

[lonestar]

I think it's funny that the sheriff wants his badges back. With "role models" like Kobe and Shaq, no wonder society is going to hell in a hand basket!

I think Adam Sandler and Vince Vaughn movies are hilarious. You need help. LOL!

[Joe 6-pack]

"Let’s see where this goes, but I’m not so sure that a police officer, when off duty, should be held to a different standard then a regular citizen."

Sheriff's are elected officials and directly responsible to their constituents. As such, they should have a lot of levity in managing their organizations as their employees (or "honorable deputies" as the case may be) are a direct reflection of the guy at the top. In this case, it's really not any different than a legislator distancing himself from an errant staff member.