but asking that he not be a homicidal maniac with a hair trigger strikes me as a reasonable baseline.
Apparently not.
As an aside, I’m not sure in what context to understand the hair trigger part?
Not in the sense of a pun, of course, just in terms of how little it takes to set off rage. Instantaneously changing your wedding night plans to murder instetad of romance is different from the carefully planned suicide bombing of a group of Danes you've never met because they're from the same country as a cartoonist. Going from "till death do us part" to beating her to death in the span of a few hours seems to suggest that the men for whom women have this surgery are easily set off. I'm not sure why a woman would want to marry a man when as little a thing as a torn hymen (which can happen through the same level of sexual activity as many of these men have engaged in, but also in sports or even riding a bike around the neighborhood) is seen a justification for murdering her. How could a woman ever feel safe around a man who is set off that easily?
Maybe I'm a sissy, but as a guy I can't imagine getting cosmetic surgery on a sensitive portion of my body just to keep a prospective spouse from beating me to death. No matter what good qualities a potential partner had, given a choice between:(1) allowing a doctor to do needlepoint down there for decorative reasons, (2) being beaten to death, or (3) finding someone sane to marry, I would not have given much consideration to options 1 and 2.
When you base your 'religion' on the subjugation of women, insults to 'honor' requiring murder, and a belief in killing anyone who does not believe as you do, and a vast inferiority complex, you need to have a hair trigger response.