Posted on 05/25/2008 7:27:08 PM PDT by StilettoRaksha
Michael Tonello didn't grow up wearing Hermès, the venerable French label founded in 1837 by Thierry Hermès as a saddlery. He never coveted Hermès ties or scarves, hallmarks of the upper crust. And the American hairstylist certainly never gave a rat's arse about the world-famous Birkin bag, the clunky, rectangular satchel so elusive that billionaires can't always get their hands on them.
For the longest time, Tonello didn't even know what a Birkin was. He just wanted enough dough to live in dreamy Barcelona. But after falling into the resale business, he haphazardly discovered the formula for procuring Birkins.
And procure them he did -- by the hundreds.
Bringing Home the Birkin (HarperCollins, $25.95) is a memoir of Tonello's madcap travels, triumphs and humiliations as he peels back the layers of pretention at the eminent design house.
''I'm just like one guy who figured out some shtick that enables me to get some money,'' Tonello said recently at Michael's Genuine Food & Drink during a pre-release book tour.
``With a little luck and a little ingenuity.''
***
Men have their Aston Martins. Women have their Birkins.
When Hermès in 1984 introduced the Birkin, named after French singer and actor Jane Birkin, it immediately became the It-bag. Twenty-five years later, it still is. It helps that the handbags start at around $9,000 and reportedly reach $100,000.
''The majority of the public has never seen one. So people get silly,'' Tonello said. ``A woman walks into an elevator with a Birkin -- I've seen this -- and all the other women look this bag and think, this woman must be a celebrity, who is she? It's an incredible tool.''
As famous as the Birkin is, its wait list is more so. At first, Tonello just didn't get it. And then he just didn't buy it.
''This whole Birkin mystique, this wait list,'' said Tonello, wearing a navy Dsquared2 jacket, whale print belt, jeans and a preppy pompadour. ``I always thought it was a huge scam.''
Tonello's resale business began in the mid-1990s when he moved to Spain and started hocking his clothing and rare books on eBay. His old Hermès scarf sparked a bidding war. A light went on.
The first visit to the local Hermès shop for more resaleable scarves brought the sticker shock of his life.
''I felt the blood drain from my face when I looked at the price tag: $690 -- for a cotton shirt? Was that a misprint?'' he writes.
``Then it dawned on me. I was in a whole new league.''
***
Soon Tonello was darting around Spain in rented cars, hunting Hermès and maxing out his credit cards. The company's policy of restricting some scarves to certain stores only amped up his online business since the sale of every rare-pattern scarf earned him a handsome mark-up. At times, he ran 60 auctions simultaneously.
Then came the online request that changed everything.
''Oh wow, my first famous client!'' Tonello writes. ```Carole Bayer Sager! That woman wrote songs for everyone.''
She wanted a Birkin.
``How come Carol Bayer Sager can't get her own Birkin?''
He tried the Barcelona Hermès shop, only to be told, ''Sorry, no Birkins here.'' He phoned others and was told the wait could be two years. So he headed to France, gambling that Birkins were more plentiful across the border.
Bad call. In Marseilles, the saleswoman also rebuffed him, but added a wallop of disdain.
''What I couldn't figure out was why she hated me so much,'' Tonello writes. ``I mean, I was in Hermès, right? It wasn't as if I'd had ordered a Big Mac at Burger King.''
More Birkin failures followed. He was forced to stick with scarves. Until one day, after buying up a storm of silk in Madrid, where the salespeople already knew him by name, he let drop: ``Oh . . . and one more thing. . . . Do you have a Birkin?''
Came the magical response: ``Let me look.''
Tonello didn't trust his voice not to crack.
The saleswoman returned, holding a large orange box. She donned white gloves and lifted the lid. Ceremoniously, she gingerly unfolded four layers of white tissue, eased off the dustcover and revealed a classic Birkin in gray croc. Price tag: $18,000.
``I'll take it.''
***
Anyone who's ever stepped into a luxury boutique and felt the sting of the doorman's disapproval will find a hero in Tonello, equal parts wide-eyed, sarcastic and desperate.
The revelations that enabled him to snag Birkin after Birkin were astoundingly simple: Look the part, talk the talk, and drop a boatload of cash before so much as murmuring, ``Got a Birkin?''
Suited up in Prada, with an Hermès day planner in his pocket and an Hermès chain d'ancre bracelet on his wrist, Tonello was unstoppable. Hermès apparently wasn't keeping track of the stunning number of purchases by one Michael Tonello. The trip from Hermès ingenue to manipulator was a heady one.
''I was dealing with billionaires here,'' he said. ``When you go downstairs to the bar at the Ritz in Paris, you feel like you are part of that world.''
In 2005 alone, Tonello said, his Hermès receipts totaled $1.6 million. With a profit of up to $5,000 on a $22,000 Birkin, Tonello was making beaucoup bucks. But he seemed to be spending them just as quickly, mostly in transit.
''I'd hop on a plane, fly to Berlin and go to a second city the same day,'' he said. ``I started to come up with logistics problems.''
Getting more than two of the unwieldy Birkin boxes through security at airports was hard enough, but carrying three might have made him look suspicious. So he began shipping the purses to his parents in West Palm Beach, who sent them on to clients.
''I felt like a heroin dealer,'' he said. ``These people were so aggressive, relentless in wanting to get bags.''
Hermès was appreciative of his business, at least before it apparently put two and two together.
''A courier came to my door with an invitation the size of a poster,'' Tonello said. ''They invited me to go with the Hermès family on a private train from Paris to Chantilly for the Prix de Diane,'' the historic horse race sponsored by Hermès since 1983.
``I didn't go because I thought it would really blow my cover.''
***
The fax that came from Hermès headquarters in 2006 wasn't as friendly.
Citing ''serious problems with the supply of skin qualities,'' Tonello's orders had been canceled. It didn't come as a surprise, exactly.
''It doesn't take any genius to sit down at a computer at Hermès and look up my name,'' Tonello said. ``I'm sure if they did, their heads spun.''
But by that point, Tonello said, he had already soured on the whole Birkin world, his reasons detailed in the book. ``I just sort of felt like maybe it really was time to get off the roller coaster.''
He hasn't tried his luck at Birkin shopping since the day the fax came, he said.
``I'm a little shopped out.''
He turned instead to writing. Hermès did not respond to requests for comment before press time.
But if, somewhere, in the tower of Hermès, an executive in an orange scarf hopes this is the last she hears about how a wily stylist outwitted the iconic design house, she may be disappointed.
It's likely headed for the big screen.
''The book,'' Tonello said, ``has already been optioned.''
“hermes bag” makes me think of Helen Thomas.
Nice article by the Miami Herald.
Pity it’s a blatant rip-off of a Wall Street Journal story of at least 6 months ago.
Wonder if anyone in Miami can spell “journalistic integrity?”
If any of you guys wants to buy one, there’s a Birkin bag for sale on eBay right now, for only $45,000.
The seller lives in Florida. I’ll bet it’s this guy’s mother.
"Show me just what Mohammed brought that was new, and there you will find things only evil and inhuman, such as his command to spread by the sword the faith he preached." - Manuel II Palelologus
"Show me just what Mohammed brought that was new, and there you will find things only evil and inhuman, such as his command to spread by the sword the faith he preached." - Manuel II Palelologus
inneresting
"Show me just what Mohammed brought that was new, and there you will find things only evil and inhuman, such as his command to spread by the sword the faith he preached." - Manuel II Palelologus
Can’t you get a Hermes tie for under $200? It’s not like everything they make is like this bag.
5-4-3-2...
You need to pair it with a St. John Suit, Rolex and a pair of Jimmy Choo’s or Manolo Blahnik’s shoes, the look complete./Just Asking - seoul62......
I agree-— jewelry says it better than a stupid handbag made from alligator that matches the desiccated skin of the proud bearer. Plus I can see and appreciate the jewelry but not a handbag
I’m a fan of Hermes; however, the Birkin is too gaudy.
*ping*
"Show me just what Mohammed brought that was new, and there you will find things only evil and inhuman, such as his command to spread by the sword the faith he preached." - Manuel II Palelologus
Knock-off Birkins, and allother Hermes prods, have been on the market for 5 + years.
Where there’s a demand...there’s a knock-off!
Huh? No one needs this stuff, but they do make some nice ties.
Vogue will feature it in its upcoming fall issue, titled: The Return Of Military Chic./Just Asking - seoul62.........
"Show me just what Mohammed brought that was new, and there you will find things only evil and inhuman, such as his command to spread by the sword the faith he preached." - Manuel II Palelologus
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