I’d gladly call a male ‘honey’ or ‘sweetie’ and it would mean nothing derogatory. It would be a term of friendliness and nothing more.
Are you both deliberately myopic?
Of course its not unusual for a female to use such terms.
Obama, as far as I see, is a male, and pray tell, when was the last time a causual male called you sweetie??
Men do not use such terms as the small change of conversation outside of intimate encounters. Ask any male. - who isn’t gay. - or an Obama supporter.
Okay dearie? (deliberate improper usage)
Honey, I'm not. The contractor who is painting my house addresses me as "gal" routinely. It's just the way he talks. I can tell from his manner and the tone of his voice that he means no offense, and I take none. If he spoke to me in a derogatory tone of voice or grabbed my a$$ while calling me "gal," then I would be offended. In cases like this, the delivery is more important that words themselves.