Dead Air- Why CBS should shutter its news division (Dinosaur Media DeathWatch™)

Slate ^ | April 23, 2008 | Troy Patterson

[abb]

To judge by the ads, the most loyal adherents to CBS' quasi-journalistic programming are impotent and incontinent. It so happens that they share these afflictions with the network's actual news division. Katie Couric is reportedly itching to bolt her gig as the anchor of broadcast TV's worst-rated evening newscast. Last month, Shelley Ross lost her job producing The Early Show, the worst-rated morning newscast, after problems concerning temper tantrums and tequila parties. Most weeks, the perfectly decent Bob Schieffer, who will retire after the 2009 inauguration, sees Face the Nation to a finish as the third-rated Sunday show. And the only thing worse than the Nielsen numbers is the product.

Poor Katie, a victim of the poor health of her medium and of simple chauvinism, of unreasonably high expectations and of a stupidly high salary. For $15 million a year, you'd think she could at least pretend to be having fun up there, but—last Friday, at least—all her cheer was forced, and all her charm was canned. Going through the motions, she went through the news of the day—polygamists in Texas, pope in Gotham, some perfunctory stuff from the campaign trail, a dollop of business news. Somewhere in there was bit on the Pennsylvania primary featuring a snippet from Billy Joel's "Allentown."

The night's big enterprise piece was a report—thin with substance, thick with outrage—on congressional earmark spending on an aquarium in Chicago. "A taxpayer watchdog group thinks something fishy is going on there," said Couric. Poor Katie. The aquarium "sits on million of dollars in net assets," said whichever reporter it was. Hmm. I'm no not-for-profit expert, but isn't that called an endowment? The human-interest story was about a child who'd reached the summit of Mount Kilimanjaro, and Couric kept teasing it in the oddest way: Boy versus mountain.

[Eric in the Ozarks]

Hari kari ?

[iopscusa]

Hari kari would be perfect but anything that will get the same result will do. The New Media looks like they will get another notch in the gun belt soon enough.

[snoringbear]

“By the end of this decade or shortly thereafter, television networks as we know them today will cease to exist.”

“To judge by the ads, the most loyal adherents to CBS’ quasi-journalistic programming are impotent and incontinent.”

Yeah, their largest demographic is the geriatric crowd for sure. I get depressed just listening to all those ads for various problems and how they're not for everyone and how they may kill you if you are one of the unlucky one's.

But, nevertheless, these seasoned citizens will be pretty much be gone by the end of the next decade and consequently so will the “Big Three's” most loyal audience.

[Condor51]

** By the end of this decade or shortly thereafter, television networks as we know them today will cease to exist. ***

Back in the Stone Age of TV (1950's), I seem to recall that 'network news' was like a 10 minute insert (interruption was more like it) in the Local Newscast. At least in Chicago where we had 4 whopping channels, 3 of which were network owned: 2-CBS, 5-NBC and 7-ABC (Channel 9-WGN).

That how I remember it anyway. And Huntley-Brinkley may have been the 1st 'real' 1/2 hour network news program.

PJ Hoff, where are you now? :-)

[Grampa Dave]

I wonder how many women/people reacted like my wife, when CBS interupted a new NCIS program and sprung Katie on the tv to lecture us about the Pa election results.

She just read this on her way out to work and said she is still mad about that, and so was everyone in her office and friends/relatives she talked to yesterday re the Katie interuptus of NCIS.

[toddlintown]

“PJ Hoff, where are you now? :-)”

I think he went to the Big Weather Bureau in the Sky not too long ago.

I remember the news going 10 minutes, then creeping out to 12 minutes, and finally 15 minutes. WBBM (CBS) would run a B & W movie, on Saturdays WBKB (ABC) would have Shock Theater (with Marvin).

[CitizenM]

I agree about the celeb worship part, and I agree that a show that gives news without commentary, rolling eyes, snears, or even praise would be a relief. We want just the facts. I am tired of people who mostly only have a B.A. degree in journalism (and had the easy courses in college) trying to push their opinions and tell people (most of whom have educations beyond the commentators') how they should feel on every issue of consequence. Don't they realize that in the morning, when people are getting ready for work, or at 6:00 p.m. after work most of that audience is quite capable of making their own analyses? Save the dumbo, dumbed-down comments for afternoons, and put those shows with the cutsie commentary and snickering between soap operas!

Viewers have changed from the days of the original TODAY show when J.Alfred Muggs was the highlight of Dave Garroway's morning. (Although at least Garroway was funny!) Today we want a good synopsis of events, we want serious reporting, we want news and not rumor or sensationalism - and we don't need to hear about the lives, children, opinions, events, etc. of these talking heads or their guests when we wake up or come home from work. And we certainly don't need to see them going ga-ga over some stupid, immoral, uncouth Hollywood personality or sports figure, especially the coverage of the wild and wicked lifestyles of today's "stars." That is sooooo teenie-bopper and groupie-like. One of the reasons that Katie failed is she was never able to shake out of the morning mold, and CBS must have thought her phony, perky (dwindling) smile and exposed legs would keep people watching. She was never a skilled reporter, she was always just a bit of fluff to decorate the set who played to the sheeple not the thinking people.

Most early morning/dinner time viewers hold down responsible, steady and important jobs and make important decisions all day. They have grown up beyond wanting to fill their heads with fluff - why don't the networks see that?

[frankenMonkey]

Olberman is getting pimped for the job.
He was on Letterman last night.

[toddlintown]

“Olberman is getting pimped for the job.”

Lord knows that he’s got the numbers. /s

[GOPJ]

Thanks for the ping.

[ConservativeMind]

Truly great lines!

[MovementConservative]

I hope fox news listens and dumps faux and friends.

Why would they? Most of the people who are home and able to watch tv in the morning are housewives and the chronically unemployed. Those people tend to like the fluffy stuff. There's nothing wrong with Fox News having a variety of programming and saving the hard news until the afternoon.

[thulldud]

...Katie interuptus....

Fix the speling(typo?) and you got a keeper there!!

[SevenofNine]

OH irony of it LOL!
You must be troll of news division if your last guy got smackdown into retirement by bunch of Freepers now your female star is being smack in the ratings by old episode of Quantum Leap or TMZ.com TV Show LOL!

They should hire Looter guy or Baghdad Bob

[RayChuang88]

The problem with evening network newscasts is that with ther 24-hour news channels and the Internet, you can get news as fast as it happens. That's why NBC--wary of the fiasco of the 2000 Olympics in Sydney--plans to offer extensive live coverage of all events using broadband Internet connections.

We're very fortunate that the Euro 2008 and World Cup 2010 soccer matches will probably start at around 7 to 9 am Eastern time, which means most soccer fans in the Western Hemisphere can watch the game at reasonable hours.

[StormEye]

"maybe they are realizing we dont like these morning show chuckle factories/celeb worship and want real news in the morning. I hope fox news listens and dumps faux and friends.

I think there is a place for the chuckle factories/celeb worship programs for many people that have little or no interest in hard/real news. Obviously they do sell advertising time on these shows and make money. I just wish this junk was placed separate programs so that those who want to see the news of the day wouldn't have their time wasted on hearing about the latest "news" about Britanny Spears or on who's dating who in Hollywood.

Another thing: Why does there have to be news every half hour on radio shows like Rush Limbaugh or Mark Levin. It's always the same CBS/ABC/NBC propaganda over and over again. (If you don't think radio news is biased just start listenting longer.) Once an hour is good enough for that tripe.

[okie01]

Lord knows that [Olbermann]’s got the numbers. /s

That's it! That's the Big Idea!

Go to co-anchors! Merge Olbermann's audience with Katie's! An immediate 10% ratings bump would result.

Call Les Moonves! Now!!!

(exclamation points added for emphasis)

[StormEye]

"Olberman is getting pimped for the job. He was on Letterman last night."

Good! He'll accelerate the decline of this DNC propanda outlet.

[conservatism_IS_compassion]

Dead Air- Why CBS should shutter its news division (Dinosaur Media DeathWatch™) Slate ^ | April 23, 2008 | Troy Patterson

By the end of this decade or shortly thereafter, television networks as we know them today will cease to exist. They will be just another url on the world wide web competing against millions of others.

Network evening newscasts will go dark after the '08 elections and their news divisions disbanded.

Well, I guess the mystery of abb's real identity is revealed.

Nice post, Troy!

[GOP_Raider]

As I mentioned on the duplicate thread, Buckhead brought down CBS News. How great is that, a mild mannered FReeper brought down the Tiffany Network??