Arizona Hug Ban

First there was the ban on hugs and high-fives at a Fairfax County, Virginia middle school last year that resulted in a flap over a 13-year-old male student, putting his arm around his girlfriend while walking down the school corridor.

This year, the Mesa, Arizona school district caused a campus uproar by enacting its own hug ban. Seeking to calm the storm, The local TV news channel (TV News 5) reported that school officials sought to calm the storm by brokering an agreement with the students that allowed hugs of two seconds or less in duration.

But this too little, too late for protesters, including parents, who had already mobilized a giant..

…a 13-year-old male student, putting his arm around his girlfriend…

Me wonders if a 13-year-old male was putting his arm around his “boyfriend” if instead of banning it, he and his “life partner” wouldn’t be singled out for an award for celebrating diversity?

…school officials sought to calm the storm by brokering an agreement with the students that allowed hugs of two seconds or less in duration.

Now I’ve heard everything. It’s one thing if students are making out, engaging in heavy petting or having sex in the hallways, but hugging? Are teachers going to have to carry a stop watch and personally time each and every hug they witness?

If an adult teacher can’t discern the difference between a simple hug and truly inappropriate behavior, then why should we believe they are qualified to teach?

Zero Tolerance rules means abdicating any pretense or effort in applying common sense.

Zero Tolerance rules means abdicating any pretense or effort in applying common sense.

As a former Asst. H.S. Principal, I totally disagree. If a student attacks a teacher should we dialogue? If a student yells F... You to a teacher should we say don’t do that again.

So now do you want teachers to have to engage in detailed surveillance? Then enforcement ends up in asst. principal-student- parent squabbling- “was only 10 seconds,” “but that’s his girlfriend,” “but other kids are hugging longer,”then the parent’s rationalizing all sorts of behaviors.

Finally, I would urge every parent to seriously consider homeschooling. God designed the family to raise children not the public school system.

Really! Your best friend is crying because her dog died, and you can't give her a hug for more than two seconds?

And I can think of a lot of other instances where a simple hug would be perfectly acceptable; you just came back to school after the death of a family member (sympathy hug), you just made the honor roll (congratulations hug), you just found out you failed a class (I know how you feel hug), you’re at your high school football game and your team just made a touchdown (celebration hug). You would think that with all the problems in schools, drugs abuse and sex and gang violence and the failings of public schools to actually teach anything like reading and basic math, that simple hugging would not be that much of a big deal.

sorry, when I was in high school in providence in the early 60’s there was no touching of any kind allowed.

Really? No touching what so ever under any circumstances? That’s pretty harsh. What would have happened if two students politely shook hands at your school? Would they have been suspended and sent off to reform school?

There is “touching” and then there is “Touching”. Any reasonable adult who can’t discern the difference should not be in a position of authority IMHO because they lack the ability to asses a real world situation and make a good judgment call based on the circumstances. It’s one thing if two students are hanging on each other in an overly sexual manner but quite another if it’s just a simple hug. And it’s certainly a “crime” for a boy and girl to be caught holding hands.

Zero Tolerance rules just don’t make any sense. For instance, when I was in high school in the 70’s I carried OTC’s like aspirin and Midol in my purse in case I got a headache or got “cramps”. My mother gave them to me and knew I had them and it wasn’t a big deal. In today’s world however if I was in a public school today and found with aspirin and Midol, I’d probably be suspended and sent off to counseling for drug abuse. And God forbid if I gave a female class mate a Midol because she was having cramps, I’d be treated the same as if I had sold her XTC, crack, hash, etc. and I’d probably be arrested.

If a student attacks a teacher should we dialogue? If a student yells F... You to a teacher should we say don’t do that again.

No. I’m not advocating that at all. If a student physically attacks a teacher then they should be dealt with appropriately. If a student uses foul language and yells at a teacher then of course appropriate action should be taken.

But what if a teacher physically attacks a student and the student acts in self defense? I actually witnessed this in my junior high. My homeroom teacher was having some sort of nervous breakdown in the class room and without any provocation, suddenly got up and started smacking around one of the boys and he defended himself and fought back. So I guess under “zero tolerance” rules the boy was actually guilty of hitting a teacher and should have been suspended and prosecuted even under the circumstances?

So now do you want teachers to have to engage in detailed surveillance? Then enforcement ends up in asst. principal-student- parent squabbling- “was only 10 seconds,” “but that’s his girlfriend,” “but other kids are hugging longer,” then the parent’s rationalizing all sorts of behaviors.

I see your point but that’s where common sense rules over arbitrary rules and zero tolerance enforcement.

Finally, I would urge every parent to seriously consider homeschooling. God designed the family to raise children not the public school system.

I don’t know what God wants as far as public education but if God gave us a brain then I would assume He intended us to use it.

I see your point but that’s where common sense rules over arbitrary rules and zero tolerance enforcement.

I don’t know how much you have dealt with juvenile delinquents and parents of delinquents but usually common sense is not one of their long suits.

In my 15+ years in education many parents complain vehemently about school discipline- until it is THEIR kid (especially teacher’s kids) then they scream - give the kid a break, arbitrary enforcement, dumb rules, the system is at fault, ...

I agree we should have common sense rules, clear expectations, and enforceable rules. Unfortunately some zero tolerance rules are needed as many of these things wind up in court.

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