Posted on 02/09/2008 3:30:24 PM PST by CGASMIA68
RED-NECK VALENTINE'S LOVE POEM
Collards is green my dog's name is Blue and I'm so lucky to have a sweet thang like you.
Yore hair is like cornsilk a-flapping in the breeze Softer than Blue's and without all them fleas.
You move like the bass, which excite me in May. You ain't got no scales but I luv you anyway.
Yo're as satisfy'n as okry jist a-fry'n in the pan. Yo're as fragrant as "snuff" right out of the can.
You have som'a yore teeth, for which I am proud; I hold my head high when we're in a crowd.
On special occasions, when you shave under yore arms, well, I'm in hawg heaven, and awed by yore charms.
Still them fellers at work, they all want to know, what I did to deserve such a purdy, young doe.
Like a good roll of duct tape yo're there fer yore man, to patch up life's trou bles and fix what you can.
Yo're as cute as a junebug a-buzzin' overhead. You ain't mean like those far ants I found in my bed.
Cut from the best cloth like a plaid flannel shirt, you spark up my life more than a fresh load of dirt.
When you hold me real tight like a padded gunrack, my life is complete; Ain't nuttin' I lack.
Yore complexion, it's perfection, like the best vinyl sidin'. despite all the years, yore age, it keeps hidin'.
Me 'n' you's like a Moon Pie with a RC cold drank, we go together like a skunk goes with stank.
Some men, they buy chocolate for Valentine's Day; They git it at Wal-Mart, it's romantic that way.
Some men git roses on that special day from the cooler at Kroger. "That's impressive," I say.
Some men buy fine diamonds from a flea market booth. "Diamonds are forever," they explain, suave and couth.
But for this man, honey, these won't do. Cause yo're too special, you sweet thang you. I got you a gift, without taste nor odor, more useful than diamonds... IT'S A NEW TROLLIN' MOTOR!!
Children are like farts: your own are just about tolerable, but everyone else's are horrendous.
LOL
I miss him though. “Beam me up!!”
and that silly hairdo
!!!
It could well be a Cajun joke and be older than the country too, y'know.
My wife found a box of junk from my childhood days including some old poems and such from my young teen angst years - some about girls (but never sent). She asked why I never write HER poems. So - I wrote her this:
“Roses are red,
Daffodils are yellow,
I love you more
than mixed fruit Jello”.
Lucky for me she puts up with a lot!
You deserve a big fat smooch for that - and a little bit more.
Ping to Dave 'n all....
LOL!!!
I don’t care who ya are, that there is a funny tag line!
Thank You. And since you know mine, would you share yours (my Latin is just a tad rusty!)
“the experts are to be believed”
It is a quote from the author of Narnia - CS lewis, I think his name was, in an essay where he discusses the evils of people who govern with a clear conscience.
His point was that a tyrant will get bored, or get drunk, or go do something else - but that someone who intends to rule you, for your own good, will never rest.
A’la hillarycare or huckabeemorals.
You’re right- government employees aren’t good for anything!
Although I’d love to see some IRS agents scraping barnacles off a tub like that..
This is the God's honest truth.
I live on Moonshine Road. And there is a Moonshine Church, which is at the top of Moonshine Hill.
If you don't believe me, read the true story, "The Blue-eyed Six". I live in Greenpoint, PA.
BTW, yes, we have a few stills in the neighborhood! ;^)
"It is, indeed, important to notice that my argument so far supposes no evil intentions on the part of the Humanitarian and considers only what is involved in the logic of his position. My contention is that good men (not bad men) consistently acting upon that position would act as cruelly and unjustly as the greatest tyrants. They might in some respects act even worse. Of all tyrannies a tyranny sincerely exercised for the good of its victims may be the most oppressive. It may be better to live under robber barons than under omnipotent moral busybodies. The robber barons cruelty may sometimes sleep, his cupidity may at some point be satiated; but those who torment us for our own good will torment us without end for they do so with the approval of their own conscience. They may be more likely to go to Heaven yet at the same time likelier to make a Hell of earth. Their very kindness stings with intolerable insult. To be cured against ones will and cured of states which we may not regard as disease is to be put on a level with those who have not yet reached the age of reason or those who never will; to be classed with infants, imbeciles, and domestic animals. But to be punished, however severely, because we have deserved it, because we ought to have known better, is to be treated as a human person made in Gods image. "
"The Humanitarian Theory of Punishment ", C.S. Lewis
"He is not entitled to an opinion even if, in addition to being a man, he should happen also to be a jurist, a Christian, and a moral theologian. For they are not question about principle but about matter of fact; and for such cuiquam in sua arte credendum. "
Come to think of it, I wonder if they did? Isn’t that how they busted him?
LOL, a revenuer actually doing work. Sorry I missed a picture of that.
ping...
Is the fleas or the collards that draws you to me???
You shore know how to woo a lady, I’ll tell you that.
I had a sip or two of Everclear once about 35 years ago.
“It made my tummy warm” [/ralph wiggums]
Do they even make it anymore?
If so, where can you get it?
I’d like to make my tummy warm again.
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