I told Kato to lay off the helium.
Posted on 02/05/2008 1:34:58 PM PST by lowbridge
Why would the editor not cut “still naked” from that sentence and give the reporter hell for writing it?
“Wait! That’s not a nunchuck!”
“Lu charged at him, nakedly.”
just had to stop and laugh there ...
I’ve got a story. Ooh, do I have a story...
It was 1979 or 1980, and I was attending Georgetown University. One of my uncles came to visit, and we went to the uber-fancy Che Roy on Wisconsin Avenue for dinner (Roy Rodgers, for those not in the know). Anyhow, we were sitting there eating our soggy roast beef sandwiches and greasy fries and BSing a bit, when there was some yelling at the counter. I turned around and saw a very small (maybe 120 pounds) Oriental man yelling and screaming at the guy on the other side. He then took his tray (food, change and drink) and flung it over the counter. Then he turned around to leave. A smile broke out on our faces - comic relief during a crappy meal.
Little did we know what was coming...the manager (seemingly an Olympic high-jumper) leapt over the counter (and cleared it by at least a foot) and grabbed the little guy by the shoulder. More yelling, punches, kung fu, etc. More employees join. I turned my chair around - sorry, Unc., but this is WAY more entertaining than our conversation.
Fast forward about 60 seconds. In walks a female cop. Not bad looking, either. She looked at the scene and immediately turned around, clutching her radio. FYI, she was about 5’2” and maybe 120. Wow, I’m really impressed with female cops. Her only choice was to shoot the guy or run away. Makes me feel very safe.
2 minutes or so later a plain-clothes cop walked in. He was large, as in about 6’5” and 250 large. He didn’t run away, clutching his radio. Nope, he waded into the pile of bleeding employees and grabbed the (quite obviously stoned/high) Oriental guy (who was also bleeding quite a bit) by the shirt collar and flung him at a very high velocity into the nearest stone wall. Score: Pretty lady cop: 0; stoned (and now stunned) Oriental kung-fu master: several employees noses, etc.; big male detective: one stoned/stunned Oriental kung-fu master.
Fast forward about 60 seconds. The paddy wagon arrives, and 2 uniformed DC cops drag our stunned kung-fu master out the door...by his feet...liberally banging his head on the door, walls, sidewalk, etc. Unc. and I walked outside to see the conclusion of the show.
BUT...it was’t over...
Our previously stunned & stoned Oriental kung-fu master suddenly became un-stunned as he was being unceremoniously thrown into the paddy wagon (which had only one of the two doors open). The last I saw, he was holding onto both doors in an attempt to stay outside of the paddy wagon, while two DC cops were kicking him in the back. Repeatedly. The crowd was cheering (which side, I don’t know, but it was cheering).
That was some of the best free entertainment that I had for quite some time. I suppose that it only would’ve been better if the guy was naked.
Good story, thanks for the effort.
It was worth it, just to slowly relive those moments.
Wonder whether naked martial arts expert boy had properly registered his arms and legs as lethal weapons... Also wonder whether he had properly registered his 'baton', er, his other leg, as a lethal weapon...
LOL, I agree! Do you have a garage? You should get a group going!
Other story links on that page:
Gotta sell papers, I guess...
LOL, first semi warm day we’ve had in the northeast in a while, it brings out the crazies...
Heh - my garage is so full of junk that a skinny midget couldn’t play a kazoo in it - I just like spotting great names for bands. For example, you know the guys who sing “Viva Viagra” in the commercial? My name for their band? The Bentwood Rockers.
In case you missed this one...
I suppose that it only would’ve been better if the guy was naked.
But would have been best if the female cop was naked.
Chappaqua, New York. - Isn’t that where BJ and Hildebeast have their lair? Was it BJ out trying to break in some potential interns?
Every now and then, when the world seems too serious, and you need to unwind it’s good to know a stupid, naked crazy man who knows kung fu is getting tazed.
I think I’ll put that on a bumper sticker...
He must have been beating on Mrs. Clinton’s front door!
You haven’t been in Chappaqua lately, right?
LOL
I told Kato to lay off the helium.
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