“disliked” was the wrong word for me to use. He may be a decent guy, worth the time of day, but not a roll in the hay.
A friend once told me two nice people don’t necessarily make for a great couple.
Perhaps. But the woman seems to take total responsibility for the situation on herself. She also seems to have a history of sexual dissatisfaction. This leads me to suspect that the husband is not really the issue.
But even if he was, a good spouse should work towards solving the problem. If he isn't attentive to her needs, she should let him know and help him out. Try to find ways to put the "zing" back into the relationship so she might have interest in him again. Don't just cut your husband off for four years.
Think of it if the spouses and subjects were different. Suppose hubby comes home every night and plops himself on the couch to silently watch t.v. He has no interest in carrying on a conversation with his wife or hearing about her day. He still thinks she is a good woman, but she has become "boring" to him and he's just not interested in the emotional aspect of the relationship anymore.
I don't think anyone would try to justify his selfish behavior. And I don't think he would be justified if it turned out that he had hidden issues with his wife. It's his responsibility to bring those things out and work towards resolving them.