This is the nut of the thing. The way you state it is one side of the coin, and the "coalition" you refer to has to do with the identification of the word "conservative" when it comes to distinct social-moral issues as differentiated from fiscal issues. There is another side of the coin -- that is that limited government that best serves the interest of social-moral issues as it does fiscal issues.
The Federal government thinks it is immoral for an employer to fire an employee for being gay. So you own a shop, you hire a 23-year-old kid who seems okay, but after awhile starts wearing his sexuality on his sleeve, swishing and sashing (he thinks it's so cute). You know he's a confused mixed-up kid who needs to learn the hard realities of moral life, and you're hoping and betting that left to his own, in ten years the kid will regard this bizarre rebellious "walk on the wild side" as an embarassing phase. You'd love to fire the kid, and it would probably be the best thing for him. But the Federal Government thinks that's immoral, and you can't. That's one small work-a-day example of how evil Federal-moral meddling can be. Further, the Federal Government thinks it's immoral for poor women to have to go without abortions, so across this nation, taxpayers are forced to abet abortion. Federal moralism has deprived us of the right to discriminate against those we'd rather not deal with for whatever reasons, usually moral. Morality or lack of it did not cause this supression of our freedom -- abandonment of Limited Government did.
Long way of saying that this is a battle about the coalition and the confusion in the minds of some "conservatives" as to which comes first, the cart or the horse. The heavy hand of Federal moralism will fail every time, whether "liberal" or "conservative," because it abandons Limited Government. We need to make it plain to "social" conservatives that Limited Government, not pick-n-choose-your-government-program, is in their interst.
More important, we must recognize and admit that cowing to pick'-n-choose-your-government-program "compassionate" conservatism is against the interest of the Republican party, hence a false premise for a coalition.
“The Federal government thinks it is immoral for an employer to fire an employee for being gay. So you own a shop, you hire a 23-year-old kid who seems okay, but after awhile starts wearing his sexuality on his sleeve, swishing and sashing (he thinks it’s so cute). You know he’s a confused mixed-up kid who needs to learn the hard realities of moral life, and you’re hoping and betting that left to his own, in ten years the kid will regard this bizarre rebellious “walk on the wild side” as an embarrassing phase. You’d love to fire the kid, and it would probably be the best thing for him. But the Federal Government thinks that’s immoral, and you can’t.”
You didn’t once mention how the proverbial “gay kid”’s job performance was like. Firing a kid for being a flamboyant homosexual IS big government, only you’re bringing the concept of big government to a business.