Posted on 07/19/2007 12:10:38 PM PDT by flutters
I once had some cops take a knife and rip out the upholstery in the back seat of my car, completely destroying the seat.
After they let me go I drove straight to the Hancock & Woodward precinct and went in and told the desk sergeant what had happened. He asked me if I had gotten the cops badge numbers.
I had asked the cops for their badge numbers and they just laughed at me. When I told the desk sergeant that, he just shrugged his shoulders and said, "Too bad". I had to pay to replace the seat.
Driving While White.
It depends on what neighborhood I broke down in. (in a car that is) :)
Please tell me how anyone can take advantage of you without your permission?
On the flip side, there’s always Eddie Murphy’s “White Like Me” skit:
Eddie Murphy: You know, a lot of people talk about racial prejudice. And some people have gone so far as to say that there are actually two Americas: one black and one white. But talk is cheap. So I decided to look into the problem myself, firsthand. To go underground and actually experience America.. as a white man.
Eddie Murphy Voiceover: I hired the best make-up people in the business. If I was gonna pass as a white man, everything had to be perfect.
Eddie Murphy: Hmm, I think that’s a little light.
Make-up Artist: Okay, let’s try this. [ applies fake white moustache on Eddie’s lips ]
Eddie Murphy: That’s, uh.. I look kind of Harry Reemsish.
Make-up Artist: Mmm, I like it.
Eddie Murphy: I studied for my role very carefully. I watched lots of “Dynasty”.
Eddie Murphy: See? See how they walk? Their butts are real tight when they walk. They keep their butts tight. I’ve gotta remember to keep my butt real tight when I walk.
Eddie Murphy Voiceover: And, I read a whole bunch of Hallmark Cards.
Eddie Murphy: “For my lovely wife.” That’s it. That’s it. That’s it. Go ahead. “You always mean lots more to me than you could ever guess. For you have done so much to fill my life with happiness.”
Eddie Murphy Voiceover: Finally, I was ready.
[ Eddie walks onto the street, the perfect portrait of a white man. He enters a convenience store, grabs a newspaper and drops it on the counter. ]
Clerk: What are you doing?
Eddie Murphy: I’m buying this newspaper.
Clerk: That’s all right. There’s nobody around. Go ahead, take it. Take it. [ Eddie gives him a quizzical look ] Go ahead, take it. Yeah. Take it. Take it.
[ Eddie takes the newspaper, and cautiously exits ]
Eddie Murphy Voiceover: Slowly, I began to realize that when white people are alone, they give things to each other for free.
[ cut to Eddie catching a bus. He sits down between two white women. ]
Eddie Murphy Voiceover: There was only one other black man on the bus. He got off on 45th Street. [ the busdriver looks around the bus carefully, then sets a party in motion, complete with music and cigarette girls ] The problem was much more serious than I’d ever imagined.
[ cut to Eddie at a bank, talking to a black Loan Officer ]
Loan Officer: Now, let me get this straight, Mr., ..uh.. Mr. White. You’d like to borrow $50,000 from our bank, but you have no collateral, you have no credit. You don’t even have any I.D. Is that correct?
Eddie Murphy: That’s right.
Loan Officer: Mr. White, I’m sorry. This is not a charity. This is a business..
White Loan Officer: Uh, Harry, why don’t you, uh, take your break now? I’ll take care of.. uh.. Mr. White.
Loan Officer: Well.. okay. Thanks, Bob. [ exits ]
White Loan Officer: [ laughs, then sits ] That was a close one, wasn’t it?
Eddie Murphy: It certainly was.
White Loan Officer: We don’t have to bother with these formalities, do we, Mr. White? Huh?
Eddie Murphy: What a silly Negro!
White Loan Officer: Just take what you want, Mr. White. Pay us back anytime. Or don’t. We don’t care.
Eddie Murphy: Tell me, do you know of any other banks like this in this area?
[ cut to Eddie back at the Make-up Room ]
Eddie Murphy: So, what did I learn from all of this? Well, I learned that we still have a very long way to go in this country before all men are truly equal. But I’ll tell you something. [ pan to reveal Eddie’s black buddies applying white make-up to their faces ] I’ve got a lot of friends, and we’ve got a lot of makeup. So, the next time you’re huggin’ up with some really super, groovy white guy, or you met a really great, super keen white chick, don’t be too sure. They might be black.
They say a conservative is a liberal who has been mugged by reality, but I can tell you as a conservative who has been abused by the cops I now listen to black people who get upset with the police.
Fortunately I’m white, well spoken and educated. If I hadn’t been, the key might have been thrown away.
I need-to get 15-thousand-dollars for-to make-me so illiterate that-I used-too many-hyphens.
Post of the day!
(BTW, I thought I gave you tree fitty last week. Why you comin’ back?)
I knew it. Your no girl scout, you're the Loch Ness Monster.
I was talking to a graduate of West Point who was there when women were allowed to attend. He mentioned one of his female classmates wrote a book of her experience. She talked about how she was harassed as a woman her freshman year. His comment was, “Then what was the reason they were harassing me.” She was being treated as badly as all the other plebes but assumed she was singled out.
I got to tell you if I was black, I’d play the race card nonstop for atleast a week.
What kind of a dumb question is that??!
Hey, libs! YOu can’t get the right answer if you don’t ask the right question.
OTOH, if I could be Clarence Thomas, I'd pay a lot for it.
I wouldn’t want to be black, and it’s not because I am prejudice, it’s because their popular culture sucks, it’s too messed up. I think it would be difficult and stressful to be black because of all of the resentment within the black culture. There is so much EFFORT that is directed to controlling how black people perceive reality, personally it would be a drain. It’s bad enough being a white person these days with all the leftist proganda going on directed towards white, I can’t imagine the hell it would be to be black. Always being told that white’s hate me, it would make me feel very insecure. I couldn’t stand it.
It's not so much because of the strains of being Black. It's heredity. So leaving all the politics aside, how much would you need to compensate for that?
Find a way to fix that, and then we can get into all those annoying social questions that people love to discuss.
Nothing like a good South Park reference to break up the day!
Political correctness has "white people" talking quietly to each other behind closed doors, while it doesn't prevent "black people" from telling you in your face. We have personal experience with both behind-the-back and in-your-face. I prefer in-your-face. At least then we know who to avoid.
Classic SNL! I loved that skit.
In a related story, surveys show that Americans would pay $37 to see a pig fly.
“Ever spoken to a white person hassled because of the color of their skin?”
Yes, usually after they went into a black neighborhood.
If I was Black, then I am sure that I would have been promoted faster. I have lost two promotions during my career to an affirmative action candidate. Of course, I eventually got promoted, just took longer.
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