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To: Kathy in Alaska; MoJo2001; Soaring Feather; E.G.C.; darkwing104; Fawnn; Radix; stand watie; radu; ..

A little Tuesday humor.......

Subject: [Things a Police Officer Says]

(These 16 Police Comments were taken off actual U.S. police car videos
around the country )

#16 “You know, stop lights don’t come any redder than the one you just went through.”

#15 “Relax, the handcuffs are tight because they’re new. They’ll stretch after you wear them a while.”

#14 “If you take your hands off the car, I’ll make your birth certificate a worthless document.”

#13 “If you run, you’ll only go to jail tired.”

#12 “Can you run faster than 1200 feet per second? Because that’s the speed of the bullet that’ll be chasing you.”

#11 “You don’t know how fast you were going? I guess that means I can write anything I want to on the ticket, huh?”

#10 “Yes, sir, you can talk to the shift supervisor, but I don’t think it will help. Oh, did I mention that I’m the shift supervisor?”

#9 “Warning! You want a warning? O.K., I’m warning you not to do that again or I’ll give you another ticket.”

#8 “The answer to this last question will determine whether you are drunk or not. Was Mickey Mouse a cat or a dog?”

#7 “Fair? You want me to be fair? Listen, fair is a place where you go to ride on rides, eat cotton candy and corn dogs, and step in monkey poop.”

#6 “Yeah, we have a quota. Two more tickets and my wife gets a toaster oven.”

#5 “In God we trust, all others we run through NCIC.”

#4 “How big were those ‘Just two beers’ you say you had?”

#3 “No sir, we don’t have quotas anymore. We used to, but now we’re allowed to write as many tickets as we can.”

#2 “I’m glad to hear that Chief (of Police) Hawker is a personal friend of yours. So you know someone who can post your bail.”

AND THE WINNER IS....

#1 “You didn’t think we give pretty women tickets? You’re right, we don’t. Sign here.”


359 posted on 07/10/2007 4:36:20 AM PDT by beachn4fun (How long will the world allow terrorism to be the answer to the problem?)
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To: beachn4fun
((LOL))

Well, the storm alarm kept us awake last night. We had t-storm and flood warnings for Grady and Caddo Counties. We're under a Flash Flood Watch for today.

Today is Patch Tuesday for Windows. Six updates will be released today.

361 posted on 07/10/2007 5:03:09 AM PDT by E.G.C.
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To: beachn4fun

LOL!


380 posted on 07/10/2007 5:59:43 AM PDT by MEG33 (GOD BLESS OUR ARMED FORCES)
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To: beachn4fun

Good Afternoon Beachn! *HUGS* How are you?


467 posted on 07/10/2007 12:25:17 PM PDT by CMS (only 2 forces offered to die for you. 1.Jesus Christ for your soul 2. American soldiers for freedom)
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