Tranzliatin'
Posted on 07/08/2007 5:05:39 PM PDT by CAWats
CBS EVENING NEWS anchor Katie Couric is being accused of slapping an editor -- after he injected a word she detested into a script!
"The stress has caused her to blow up at her staff for small infractions on the set," charges NEW YORK magazine reporter Joe Hagan, in a story set for publication on Monday.
"During the tuberculosis story in June, Couric got angry with news editor Jerry Cipriano for using a word she detested— 'sputum' —and the staff grew tense when she began slapping him 'over and over and over again' on the arm, according to a source familiar with the scene. It had seemed like a joke at first, but it quickly became clear that she wasn’t kidding."
A top CBS executive tells the DRUDGE REPORT that no formal complaint has been filed against Couric over the incident.
"I sort of slapped him around,” Couric admits to the magazine. “I got mad at him and said, 'You can’t do this to me. You have to tell me when you’re going to use a word like that.' I was aggravated, there's no question about that.' But she says she has a good relationship with Cipriano. 'We did ban the word sputum from all future broadcasts. It became kind of a joke."
A CBS insider says Couric slapped the staffer in a playful manor.
"Look, it wasn't serious, whatsoever."
The magazine fronts the nearly 6,000-word expose with the headline: "I have days when I'm like, 'Oh my God, What did I do?' KATIE COURIC'S IMPOSSIBLE YEAR"
Developing...
The next best term, I believe, is “speculum”.
Merely a case of PMS. It can make you a cwazee lady.
As an anchor, I suck. Additionally, I blame others for my job problems. I tend to scream at people. And I slap people who bug me.
If that perky bitch had slapped me she would have to spend several additional hours in make-up before her show for the next few weeks.
My question is:
What if the situation were reversed?
How ‘playful’ would it be if Cipriani slapped Couric in precisely the same manner?
I think she’d done now.
That reminds me of the time I slapped the hot secretary on the rear end at my last job. It was just a joke of course.
Good times.
Remember to get them to lengthen your chain.
< }B^)
Guafasamine. We know what that is, but Katie probably doesn’t. She really doesn’t know much, and since neither does her audience, it would slip right by :)
Glad you axed!
Remember her televised colonoscopy? Well, as you might have guessed, we weren't told the whole story. Nor did we see the entire procedure. It all started back when she first noticed that all was not right with her nether region. Being of a do-it-yourself bent, she decided to take a close look herself before making that embarassing call to the proctologist. But once she pushed her way past those chronically spasmed sphincters, it soon dawned on her that she was trapped in there. You can imagine her panic as she blindly hopped in the general direction of her cel and feverishly felt the keyboard for 911, only to realize that feces was a poor conductor of sound and nobody would hear her. When the Guatemalan maid arrived later that morning and noticed her odd position, she understandably assumed it was just some sort of advanced yoga, so she completed her usual chores and went on her way. Back in Guatemala, she'd seen the shamans and brujos perform even stranger rituals in the jungle and as she dusted the ballustrade, she dreamily recalled seeing her first circus geeks shortly after wading across the Rio Grande. Somehow, katie's yogic gyrations reminded her of the spastic meanderings of those headless chickens. And besides, she knew her athletic employer well by now and it seemed only natural that her head would be lodged where it was as she pushed and pulled and rolled and tumbled. As so often happens, fear overcame pride. Katie hopped out on her front lawn and was soon wisked away to the ER. We've all heard the story of the Chinese railroad workers blasting and tunneling their way through the Sierra mountains, but theirs was a trivial task compared to what awaited katie's surgeon. Indeed, he envied the slaves who toiled ceaselessly under the Egyptian lash to build those pyramids, as he laboriously dissected and probed his way past those stubborn sphincters and finally extracted katie's head -- only to find himself confronted by about a hundred pounds of impacted fecal matter. He knew he was about to find out firsthand what it was like for those men who dug the Panama Canal with nothing but shovels and sweat. But they had it easy. They didn't have to listen to a scolding, screeching banshee while they did it. After injecting her with enough sedative to put the Mongol Hordes into a stupor, he grit his teeth and finally finished the grim excavation.
In view of her harrowing experience, is it any wonder that, at bottom, the core issue of Katie's life is her bottom? Should it surprise us that the mere mention of any other organ would seem to trivialize the signal event of her whole life and send her into a rage?
Let’s see: Boot-em? Shoot-em?
Good thing the editor didn’t hit her back. That would be illegal and wrong, as women are children who are not responsible for their actions in the eyes of the law.
Mmmmmm, well I guess the birds aren’t choosey. I know they splashed it all over the TV when the bird chose President Bush.
Katie is really trying to dig a deep hole.
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I can imagine that Couric is not a lot of fun to work with.
She should just say “Cheney” or “Bush” when they ask her to say “sputum”. To her it would be the same distasteful thing.
Apparently, she is only qualified to report about medical conditions involving the other end.
"Expectorant" is a drug that helps loosen up mucus and thereby help bring up sputum.
"Sputum" is material coughed up from the respiratory tract (a necessity for diagnosis tuberculosis) and is no more "ungentle" that the medical term "stool".
"Sputum" is the professional term for the "stuff". "Ungentle" terms are "gob", "loogie", "honker", "gruck", etc.
Likewise, "stool" is the professional term for the "stuff" from the other end. "Ungentle" terms are ..........
Well, you get the picture.
A "professional" she is not.
Hah, Katie’s already got her name added to the Sputum article on Wikipedia.
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