Posted on 06/10/2007 9:02:40 PM PDT by doug from upland
Sunday, June 10, 2007 8:10 p.m. EDT Hillary Clinton: I Play Pickup Basketball
Sen. Hillary Rodham Clinton loves to tell whoppers.
Her latest: she has played "pickup basketball.”
It’s the latest in tall-tale fibs she has been spinning to make herself more likeable to voters.
The New York Times revealed Hillary’s problem in a feature article this weekend headlined "Hillary Clinton Searches for Her Inner Jock.”
Noting that Americans like their president to be active in sports, Hillary, at first blush, doesn’t seem to pass the grade.
"Voters expect their presidents to throw out the first pitch; they are used to George W. Bush clearing brush, Bill Clinton playing golf, George H.W. Bush racing speedboats, and Ronald Reagan riding horseback.”
Hillary’s MySpace page claims she is a "speedwalker” also with using her leisure time to do "crossword puzzles, Scrabble and gardening.”
This spells B-O-R-I-N-G.
The Times quotes one Hillary donor explaining the dilemma: "How does 59-year-old Mama run against sexy [Barack] Obama?”
One way may be to play "make believe.”
Last week, Hillary joined tennis pro Billie Jean King for a Women for Hillary event.
"I played softball, I played pickup basketball, I played tennis,” Hillary claimed at the event.
Hillary remembered she even had won a trophy once in an Arkansas mixed-doubles tournament.
But her "pickup basketball” story appears to be a feeble effort to play catch up with Obama’s athleticism. He does play basketball, along with vigorous and frequent workouts at the gym.
For sure, Hillary has a propensity to make things up when she gets into a political bind.
Among Hillary’s more hilarious claims:
She was named after Sir Edmund Hillary. who climbed Mount Everest.
She was a Yankees fan when she lived in Chicago.
She told upstate New Yorkers she had been a "duck hunter.”
She claimed on Sept. 11 daughter Chelsea was jogging around the World Trade Center.
I wouldn’t be surprised if she knows some tricks with ping pong balls.
Most nose tackles have legs skinnier than that. Ouch....
Bill and Hillary were at a Yankees game. They sat in the first row,with the Secret Service people directly behind them.
One of the Secret Service guys leans forward and whispers something to Bill. At first, Clinton stares at the guy, looks at Hillary, looks back at the agent, and shakes his head "no".
The agent then syas, "Mr. President, it was an unamamous request of the entire team, from the owner to the bat boy."
Bill hesitates.....But begins to change his mind when the agent tells himthe fans would love it! Bill shrugs his shoulders and says, "Ho-Kay! If that's what they want."
"C-mere Hilly baby....." with that Bill gets up; grabs Hillary by her collar and the seat of her pants; lifts her up; and tosses herover the wall onto the field.
She gets up screaming; kicking; and swearing. "Bill you !$@&!&! The crowd goes wild. Fans are jumping up and down; cheering; hooting; hollering and high fiving! Bill is bowing; smiling; and waving to the crowds. He leans over to the agent and said: "How about that! I never would have believed how much they are enjoying that!"
Noticing the agent has gone pale, he asks: " Whats wrong?"
The agent replies: "Sir, I said they wanted you to throw out the First Pitch.
LOL Correction: Hillary has one of her slaves pick it up, bring it over to her being very careful not look at her directly. She then announces it’s time to toss the ball away. Not by her hands of course; but the slave who is still not looking at her directly.
You can see from this story there is a certain “train crash” Jerry Springersonian curiosity to Hillary, It’s like you don’t want to look but you have to because it is so bazaar.
However when we get into weekly media coverups of crimes with her it will be the same dread we had with Billiejeff.
this sounds like me... and i am NOT boring... ask my hubby... he calls me his peppercini... :-)
...until two days after the statute of limitations had run out.
Shirts or skins?
She confused herself with hubby’s dribbling balls...
Maybe that’s why he has his office in Harlem home of the Globetrotters - because he likes dribbling balls.
Tree trunks...No wonder pants suits.
Few would doubt her if she claimed to have regularly kicked ass in the world class division of the liars club.
What happened to the legal case that was going to bring her down?
Hillary: “The Nutcracker” is my favorite ballet.
Zen and the Art of Football Catching.
Hillary’s athleticism begins and ends as the lead horse on the Budweiser beer wagon.
Unfortunately, the MIDI is no longer operable. I can’t remember which college fight song I used to lampoon her -—
SONG PARODY: Kathleen Kennedy Townsend Fight Song
Your Opinion/Questions Miscellaneous Keywords: ANOTHER DRUNKEN KENNEDY?
Source: DOUG FROM UPLAND - Song Parodies
Published: 2-2001 Author: Lyrics, Doug from Upland
Posted on 02/05/2001 07:51:32 PST by doug from upland
MIDI - KATHLEEN KENNEDY TOWNSEND FIGHT SONG - (AJHS fight song - it has the star)
I’ve tried to stay sober unlike my old Uncle Ted
Too bad that Mary Jo is not here…but she’s dead
I have been rooting hard
I will scream, I will scream, “Ravens, GO!
We’re gonna beat those Giants…I really hate those Giants
If they should score a football…we’ll score our own
With good guys like Ray Lewis…those guys will never screw us
I loved it when we made that football…Ravens, GO!
Hillary will be under oath this year in Paul v Clinton. With about two months, the Calif. Appellate Court will determine whether she comes back in as a defendant. Then, depositions begin. We have new video evidence that was withheld by a US Atty for two years that shows her absolute coordination and solicitation of an illegal donation from Peter.
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