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Qaeda Caves Under Pressure of Democrat Pull-Out Bill
Scrappleface ^ | 4-27-07 | Scott Ott

Posted on 04/30/2007 7:03:56 AM PDT by smoothsailing

Qaeda Caves Under Pressure of Democrat Pull-Out Bill

By Scott Ott, Editor-in-Chief, ScrappleFace.com

News Fairly Unbalanced. We Report. You Decipher.

(2007-04-27) — Al Qaeda in Iraq today announced it would cease all martyrdom operations, bombings, kidnappings and attacks on U.S. and Iraqi forces just a day after the Democrat-controlled U.S. Senate sent a bill to President George Bush that sets a timeline for withdrawal from Iraq.

“Under orders from our supreme ruler, Usama bin Laden, we announce our complete surrender and ask for mercy from our triumphant conquerors,” said an unnamed spokesman on a prerecorded audio statement released on al-Jazeera and CNN. “We are defenseless in the face of the Democrats’ aggressive pull-out schedule — Allah be praised.”

Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid and House Majority Leader Nancy Pelosi plan a trip to Baghdad next week to receive the surrender documents from an al-Qaeda emissary who has committed to meeting them in a public marketplace for the historic ceremony.


TOPICS: Political Humor/Cartoons; War on Terror; Your Opinion/Questions
KEYWORDS: defeatocrats; dhimmicrats
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Pelosi and Reid celebrate Al Qaeda Surrender

1 posted on 04/30/2007 7:03:57 AM PDT by smoothsailing
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To: smoothsailing
ROFL!!

I'll bet it's fun to work for scrappleface.

2 posted on 04/30/2007 7:07:21 AM PDT by Allegra (Hey! Quiet Down Out There!)
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To: smoothsailing

Not only was the spokesman unnamed, he was unarmed as he made the announcement.

Immediately after, he fell to the ground in a position of supplication. Later examination of this unnamed spokesman indicated a very sudden case of lead poisoning. The sequence of events was rather uncertain.

There have been no further statements from this unnamed spokesman.


3 posted on 04/30/2007 7:09:35 AM PDT by alloysteel (For those who cannot turn back time, there is always the option of re-writing history.)
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To: Allegra

Funny.


4 posted on 04/30/2007 7:13:32 AM PDT by stockpirate (Al Qaeda is in the United States, they are in the House and Senate, Democrats all!)
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To: smoothsailing

I could tell right away that this wascrappleface.

The reason: It wont be Al Qaeda doing the surrendering ,it will be the Democrat party and the United States headed by them.


5 posted on 04/30/2007 7:15:26 AM PDT by sgtbono2002 (I will forgive Jane Fonda, when the Jews forgive Hitler.)
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To: alloysteel

This is really sad:
Iraq Pullout will turn into:
a. $5 gas within 6 months
b. gas lines within 1 year
c. gas rationing within 2 years
d. all of the above

It will all be put on GW not for the pull out
but for ‘starting’ the Iraq war as a vendetta
to settle accounts for the first Bush POTUS


6 posted on 04/30/2007 7:15:44 AM PDT by blue_nova
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To: blue_nova
It is going to be much worse than that.

What will happen if we leave before we achieve victory:

The terrorists whether they are Al Qaeda or the Iranian and Syrian terrorist regimes or a combination of all of them will not only control Iraq but the whole Middle East and with it come consequences to the US and the West that is worst than our most horrible nightmares. The terrorists will use the hundred of billions of oil revenues to conduct terrorists attacks that its hundred of folds more horrible, more deadly, and more damaging than the 9/11 terrorists attacks, including the use of nuclear weapons and they will also use the oil weapon to blackmail the Western and the world economy for many years to come.

If some terrorists dwelling in camps in Afghanistan with a limited budget and few volunteers were able to do 9/11 terrorist attacks, killed 3000 people and caused one trillion dollars in economic losses, imagine the incredible horrors that the terrorists can inflict on us if they control the whole Middle East and it vast revenues.

We are not fighting in Iraq for the Iraqis, we are fighting for our freedom and our way of life and those of our children, grandchildren, and for many generations to come.

7 posted on 04/30/2007 7:21:00 AM PDT by jveritas (Support The Commander in Chief in Times of War)
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To: Allegra
Good morning, Allegra, from Pennsylvania!

I'll bet it's fun to work for scrappleface.

It's gotta be! Any opportunity to heap scorn and ridicule on our domestic enemies must not only be fun, but quite gratifying.

Stay well, dear Allegra. :)

8 posted on 04/30/2007 7:43:00 AM PDT by smoothsailing ("Freedom is never more than one generation away from extinction"--President Ronald Reagan)
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To: jveritas
We are not fighting in Iraq for the Iraqis, we are fighting for our freedom and our way of life and those of our children, grandchildren, and for many generations to come.

There is no better way to say it.

9 posted on 04/30/2007 7:45:37 AM PDT by smoothsailing ("Freedom is never more than one generation away from extinction"--President Ronald Reagan)
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