Posted on 03/25/2007 5:51:34 PM PDT by COUNTrecount
(CBS) When John and Elizabeth Edwards announced this past Thursday that her breast cancer had returned and spread to her bones, and that his presidential campaign would continue, they sparked a national discussion about the choices involved.
At this stage Elizabeth's cancer is incurable and treatment doesn't always prolong life. Was it the right decision to stay in the race? Can John Edwards run for president and care for his wife and family, a family that has already suffered the death of a son more than a decade ago? Can John Edwards be president without being distracted by his wife's illness?
Those are some of the questions 60 Minutes correspondent Katie Couric asked the couple this weekend after a campaign event in Las Vegas.
Katie Couric: Elizabeth, first and foremost, how are you feeling?
Elizabeth Edwards: Actually, I feel fine. I mean, except for a cracked rib that is completely unrelated to any of the more serious issues I face, I feel terrific.
Katie Couric: Have you found that people are relating to you a bit differently with this news?
Elizabeth Edwards: Well, I mean, I had somebody... hug me... in the last hour with a tear going down the side of her face. And I'm actually hoping that's one of the things that this discussion will fix. That people will see that – that you're not necessarily dying of cancer but you can also live with cancer and that – and you can live a full life. Concentrate on the things that matter to you.
We're all going to die. And I pretty much know what I'm going to die of now. But I – I do want to live as full and normal a life as I can from this point on.
Katie Couric: Have you received any additional information the last couple of days about where the cancer might have spread other than this area of your ribs?
Elizabeth Edwards: That was... there... we... there are a couple of hot spots, on the bone scan, in my right hip, for example. And one of the questions is whether or not to do radiation to reduce the size of that – of the cancer in that location and for fear that it might weaken my bone and that I might break my hip. But their consensus was that it was too small an area for that to be a risk.
So, you know, we were on a real roller coaster, the two of us, on Wednesday. Katie Couric: Tell me about that roller coaster.
John Edwards: Well, we went to the hospital... and it became pretty clear to me that there were at least two or three suspicious places on the bone scan. Elizabeth looked at it and saw exactly the same thing. Both of us were worried before we even had the doctor interpret the bone scan. And then the doctor came in and confirmed what – what both of us already thought, which is that it looked like metastatic disease. That it looked like it-- it-- the cancer was back.
Katie Couric: Tell me what went through your mind when you looked at that bone scan?
John Edwards: Pain – hurt, I mean, I was – for me, I was very worried about the woman I love more than anything.
I was pacing back and forth in the room where the bone scan was being done trying to look at it from every angle and see if it...
Elizabeth Edwards: Went away somewhere?
John Edwards: Yeah, I wanted it to go away. It didn't go away.
Katie Couric: Were you terrified you might lose your wife?
John Edwards: Of course, absolutely, but I've been worried about that for... for several years now.
Katie Couric: That must have been hard once again to have to face your kids and to talk to Emma Claire and Jack who are 8 and 6. That is tough.
What did you say?
John Edwards: I said, "Well, Mommy's cancer's back."
And they said, "Can she die from this?"
And I said, "Yes, but she could live a very long time."
And then Elizabeth said all of us are going to die eventually. We’re all gonna die from something. And mommy knows now what she’s probably going to die from.
Katie Couric: Can you describe the decision making process for me in terms of what should we do now? Do we stay in? Do we suspend it temporarily? Do I call the whole thing off? Do we call the whole thing off? How did that unfold?
John Edwards: Well, first the decision was made by the two of us, no one else... as it should be. And she said to me, "This is what we believe in. This is what we're spending our lives doing. It's where our heart and soul is. And we can not stop."
The doctor came in. And I said, "I need to know. We have a tough decision to make. We know what we want to do. But I need to know whether Elizabeth can physically do this and I don't mean physically stay at home and watch me do it. I mean, can she physically do it, go out on the campaign trail, do all the work that needs to be done?"
The country's going to want to hear from her, and I knew that. And the doctor said yes she absolutely could physically do it. Elizabeth Edwards: You know, you really have two choices here. I mean, either you push forward with the things that you were doing yesterday or you start dying. That seems to be your only two choices. If I had given up everything that my life was about – first of all, I'd let cancer win before it needed to. You know, maybe eventually it will win. But I'd let it win before I needed to.
And I'd just basically start dying. I don't want to do that. I want to live. And I want to do the work that I want next year to look like last year and... and the year after that and the year after that. And the only way to do that is to say I'm going to keep on with my life.
Katie Couric: At your press conference, you were both extremely confident, very upbeat.
Elizabeth said, “Right now we feel incredibly optimistic. I don’t expect my life to be significantly different.”
And I think some people wondered if you were in denial, if you were being realistic about what you were going to be facing here.
Elizabeth Edwards: I... I... I... I think that it is our intention to deny cancer any control over us.
And though I know there are people who live short lives, I feel optimistic, not because I've got rose-colored glasses on, but because I know that I have only low-volume... a small amount of cancer in my bones.
John Edwards: We don't understate or misunderstand the seriousness of this. I mean, this could kill her, and we know it. And what we won't choose to do is... we choose to live our lives fully, and with strength and optimism. We get to make that choice.
And that's what we choose.
Katie Couric: Your decision to stay in this race has been analyzed, and quite frankly judged by a lot of people. And some say, what you're doing is courageous, others say it's callous. Some say, "Isn't it wonderful they care for something greater than themselves?" And others say, "It's a case of insatiable ambition." You say?
John Edwards: I say all of those judgments and questions are entirely legitimate. I mean, you offer yourself up for service to the country as the President of the United States, you deserve to be evaluated. I am perfectly open to that evaluation. I think that I know, when I'm running for president, I'm running for president because I want to serve this country, and because I want all people in America to have the same kind of chances that I've had.
I've come from nothing to now have everything. And I think everybody in this country, no matter who their family is, or what the color of their skin, ought to get that chance.
But, throughout this process, people will be able to see very clearly into what we do, what we say, how we behave, and they can evaluate for themselves whether they think I'm, in fact, doing this for the right reason.
We know the truth. We know the truth, but I think it's a fair judgment for Americans to make.
Elizabeth Edwards: Cancer took a lot away from us a few years ago. It took a year of my life and a lot of John's. I didn't want it to take this away not just from me but from those people who depend on our having the kind of president he would be.
Katie Couric: Here you're staring at possible death...
Elizabeth Edwards: Aren't we all though.
Katie Couric: And you're thinking, "I don't want to deprive the country of having my husband lead us."
Elizabeth Edwards: That would be my legacy wouldn't it, Katie. That I'd... that I'd... that I'd... that I'd taken out this fine man from the possibility of giving a great service. I mean, I don't want that to be my legacy.
Katie Couric: Politics, as you know, can be a cynical business.
John Edwards: No!
Katie Couric: You didn't know that?
John Edwards: Yeah, I was not aware of that.
Katie Couric: Glad I... (laughter) I’m glad I could teach you something today. Some have suggested that you're capitalizing on this.
John Edwards: Here's what I would say about that.
First of all, there's not a single person in America that should vote for me because Elizabeth has cancer. Not a one. If you're considering doing it, don't do it. Do not vote for us because you feel some sympathy or compassion for us. That would be an enormous mistake. The vote for the presidency is far too important for any of those things to influence it.
But, I think every single candidate for president, Republican and Democratic have lives, personal lives, that indicate something about what kind of human being they are. And I think it is a fair evaluation for America to engage in to look at what kind of human beings each of us are, and what kind of president we'd make.
Katie Couric: Some people watching this would say, "I would put my family first always, and my job second." And you're doing the exact opposite. You're putting your work first, and your family second.
John Edwards: But this is not work. Work is what I did as a lawyer. This is service. This is... this is a country that I love – both of us love, as much as we love our lives.
Katie Couric: I guess some people would say that there's some middle ground. You don't have to necessarily stay at home and feel sorry for yourself, and do nothing. But, if given a finite – a possibly finite period of time on the planet – being on the campaign trail, away from my children, a lot of time, and sort of pursuing this goal, is not, necessarily, what I'd do.
John Edwards: Well, but we all... we are all different, number one. Number two, we all have a finite period time, and the idea that we know what that finite period is, is a fantasy to begin with.
Elizabeth Edwards: We learned that in ’96.
John Edwards: As we learned in 1996, with our son. We don’t know what’s gonna happen. We don't know what's gonna happen tomorrow. We have to live today the best way we know how. And that's exactly what the two of us are doing. I do think, though, that we have to be very sensitive about the tension that exists between our wanting to serve our country, and our children.
Elizabeth Edwards: We have been contemplating all the different ways that we can make certain that they are with us as much as possible. I've often said that the most important thing you can give your children (is) wings. Because, you're not gonna always be able to bring food to the nest. You're... sometimes... they're gonna have to be able to fly by themselves.
Katie Couric: They're 6 and 8. They're still baby birds.
Elizabeth Edwards: They are still baby birds. But...
John Edwards: But they've got to start learning to fly. And they're not ready to fly on their own yet, but they've got to start learning.
Katie Couric: Even those who may be very empathetic to what you all are facing might question your ability to run the country at the same time you're dealing with a major health crisis in your family.
John Edwards: Well, all I can tell you is I know from my own life experience that I can do it. I don't have to guess about that.
Second, people will be able to watch during the course of this campaign. And I ask them to watch.
Katie Couric: Can you understand their concern, though, Senator Edwards, that gosh, at a time when we're living in a world that is so complicated and so dangerous that the president cannot be distracted by, rightly so, caring about his wife's situation?
John Edwards: I care about her situation. I love her. And I'm gonna always care about her situation. But I understand that I have a responsibility to this country. It's why we're doing this.
And that responsibility includes the ability to focus and have clarity when hard judgments have to be made. I am completely convinced that I can do that. And it's for the country to determine whether they agree.
Katie Couric: You said, this weekend, "I am definitely in the race for the duration." If you want to give the honest answer, how can you say that, Senator Edwards, with such certainty? If, God forbid, Elizabeth doesn't respond to whatever treatment is recommended, if her health deteriorates, would you really say that?
John Edwards: We have every reason to be optimistic to be right now. I believe in my heart and soul that Elizabeth is going to do well. I do believe that.
She will be out there campaigning with me, and separately.
And if you ask me today, whether I'm in this campaign for the duration, the answer to that question is, "Yes."
"...and then reappearing in 2012 wouldn't score a zillion more points."
Exactly. Even though he doesn't appeal to me in the least, the dopey, leftist Soccer Moms would SWOON over something like that.
When you get stage four cancer, get back to us.
Chemo, radiation and other treatments aren't compatable with anything.
All I'm saying is people should be spending quality time with their families NOW, not wait until someone falls ill and there's no hope of recovery. I saw someone post on another thread that many people with cancer wholeheartedly agree with their decision to go on with their lives. Make the best of the time they have left together. Not everyone with an ill spouse can afford to quit working to be at their side 24/7. They still have to live. Being a caretaker causes stress in itself and a person shouldn't be made to feel guilty about having time away from a sick family member. It seems Mrs. Edwards understands that and I think you're all being a little harsh on the them. I don't have a problem with their decision and I think it's pretty selfish that everyone thinks otherwise.
I have a sis-in-law who loves her elderly mother dearly and spends every spare moment she can with her. I hear a lot of resentment in her voice when she tells me about her visits with mom. So much of her time is taken up, there's none left for her. Is that how you'd like your children/spouse to feel? Not me.
Have you been following the story of Kay Yow, NC State Women's basketball coach? She is battling her third recurrance of breat cancer. She took two months off from coaching in but returned to the team in January. She is taking chemo and biologic treatments and just led her team to the Sweet 16 in Fresno CA. She's had a nurse flying with her and her oncologist went with her this past weekend, she has been tired and sick, but she was able to coach. She said that during a game--for two hours she didn't think about cancer. More power to her. She's been an inspiration to my mother who was just diagnosed with Stage IV lung cancer. My mother sees Kay Yow out there and she is inspired to lead as normal a life as possible for as long as possible. I don't agree with the Edwards politically on anything, but I did agree with Elizabeth's statement that to give up immediately is to let the cancer win before it has too.
When a man and woman bring a child into the world, that child is due their time and resources. They are not wee cute little birds to be thrown out of the nest, nor is a a man a President who abandons his children and sick wife, no matter how she may speak.
I don't see it as abandoning her at all. I'm sure this was as much her choice as his. Post 85 said it very well. More power to them both, I applaud their strength to go on with life in spite of the cancer. May it be a long and happy one.
Such strength! Such long and happy lifes ...
Adults all, and their choices are theirs.
Still, what about the six and eight year old. The "replacments" for the older brother they never met, born to an older "mother"? Mother in quotes. Where is her commitment to those innocents? Where is his?
"Toss them out of the nest already! Grow those wings! Fly or die! This place is getting too crowded, and they bother us! We have so much better, bigger, garnder, greater things to do and people to see!"
I guess I'm more disturbed at how distrustful I've become regarding politicians, especially liberal ones.
Nobody is saying she needs to "give up". What we are saying is this could shorten her life, being dragged along a campaign trail. Thank god I have a husband who loves me and makes me his #1 priority, not his career or his own ambitions.
They are not wee cute little birds to be thrown out of the nest, nor is a a man a President who abandons his children and sick wife, no matter how she may speak.
Amen to that!
Absolutely! It needs to be about the person fighting this battle. They don't need stress or extra put on them at this time.
Talking about "is he supposed to drop out of life waiting for his wife to die?" Maybe he read the Michael Schavio book of being a good husband and how to "get on" with life.
I have a sis-in-law who loves her elderly mother dearly and spends every spare moment she can with her. I hear a lot of resentment in her voice when she tells me about her visits with mom.
Wow her mother must really be appreciative.
She had a nurse flying with her? And she was able to do all of this. How marvelous. The problem is that is NOT a normal happening. Look, I have cancer, and three of my friends do, and many in the past. We keep joking about these "people" who have stage iv cancer and keep working and dancing and never get sick and never get debilitated and even drive themselves back and forth like nothing is wrong! Funny part is, I don't know any. I just keep hearing about them.
Reality for most is quite different, I can assure you.
Hey, greccogirl, you have my sympathies for your problem with cancer. Hang in there!
I'm tryin'. I guess I should be finding some great thing to do while I'm suffering.
I learned how to play guitar. It took my mind away from the pain. Not cancer, but something about as deadly.
Keep your sense of humor, for that is immortal.
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.