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All children are home-schooled from the beginning. When a parent brings a 2, 3, or 4 year old to the doctor with attentional concerns, the parent is the concerned 'teacher' not the public schools. ( Softballmom)

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Are these kids in daycare and pre-schools? Are there moms working outside the home from early ages?

The NEA is pushing for universal pre-K and full-day kindergarten. I predict an explosion of ADD and ADHD.

Let's look at how children are raised by the members of our church.

1) A mother in my congregation taught me how to get my newborns to sleep through the night. She told me that I should not talk or play with the baby when he woke up during the night, and to use only the smallest light needed to change his diaper and feed him. She said that in this way the baby learns that it is boring a night and more worthwhile to sleep.

2) When infants cry in church, the moms leave and take them to a quiet and boring area of the church ( such as facing the wall). The moms do **not** entertain the child by talking and playing, but change diapers and feed the child in silence. In this way the infant soon learns that being quiet in the congregation is more interesting than being noisy facing a wall.

2a) As the children get older ( in my children about 2 1/2) if the child misbehaves during the service, another member ( NOT the mom or dad) will take the child out of the service. The mother and father then retrieves the child after 2 to 5 minutes. The child is told, "Quiet children can stay in the service with their family."

3) The mothers being teaching their children in infancy how to be quiet. Every day they line their children up on the sofa. They teach their children how to fold their arms or hands, and encourage them ( sometimes with small rewards) how to sit still and be quiet. They do this for about 5 minutes every day and explain the behavior needed during church.

4) They establish a routine of morning, evening, and mealtime prayer and daily scripture reading. ( During these times the children are expected and encouraged to be quiet and non-disruptive.)

4a)They have set meal times and no snacking between meals.

5) These children have regular nap times.

6) Unless the family is desperate, the mothers do **not** work.

7) The mothers and fathers are continually sharing gentle but effecting disciplining techniques.

Isn't it amazing? These children can sit quietly in a physician or dentist's office! They can stand in line at the bank. They don't go "nutz" in the supermarket. And,,,,there teachers LOVE these kids in school!

The children of our members are in gifted and talented programs far more often that statistics would dictate.

Do we have ADHA in our congregation. Yes! It is **only** with older children who have parents who have converted to the religion. It is amazing, but the behavior ( and school work) of these children improves the longer they are active in the church.

Ok,,,I am waiting for an ADHA/ADD defender to call me abusive!

Thanks for offering several specific illustrations of good parenting from infancy. I like how these parents draw on their resources and common sense to solve problems and forestall problems. And as you noted in your post, these kids go on to school and their behaviors create a good working relationship with teachers and I would suppose these kids also do well in school and will continue to do well.

These parents in your church are being very good first teachers of their children and as such the kids benefit from learning how to be appropriate. The common thread in these situations is that the parents take control and the kids follow their lead. That's not abusive, that's good parenting.

I do hate to burst your bubble though, but good parents come from every spectrum of society, not just those that are in your church.

"Are these kids in daycare and pre-schools? Are there moms working outside the home from early ages?"

Both of my children went to daycare. One was ADD and one wasn't. Both raised by the same parents, attended the same church, and taught in the same school system, often by the same teachers.

"Let's look at how children are raised by the members of our church."

1 & 2: Both seem to be pretty much common sense to me. We did both, except we generally do NOT expect the very youngest to stay queit all the way through church, especially an infant. I'm not real sure about the purpose of having infants in the church service.

"3) The mothers being teaching their children in infancy how to be quiet. Every day they line their children up on the sofa..."

Can't say as I ever did this, at least not every day.

"4) They establish a routine of morning, evening, and mealtime prayer and daily scripture reading. ( During these times the children are expected and encouraged to be quiet and non-disruptive.)"

More "organized" prayer than we do in our household but to each his own.

"4a)They have set meal times and no snacking between meals."

I can't agree with the necessity of this at all. Especially not if the snacks are healthy ones. What is the purpose of this?

"5) These children have regular nap times."

As did mine.

"Do we have ADHA in our congregation. Yes! It is **only** with older children who have parents who have converted to the religion..."

Hard to believe. But

"Ok,,,I am waiting for an ADHA/ADD defender to call me abusive!"

What is an ADD/ADHD defender? Do you think we're delusional because we believe ADD/ADHD is real in some kids (although I DO believe it's overdiagnosed). And I would never call you abusive, at least not based on this post.

Two of my six children have ADHD. They're also the two children who were adopted. They definitely have something wrong with their brains in that they have a lot of trouble regulating their activity levels and attention span. Mind you , I did NOT say behavior. They are well behaved children and very well mannered, if you don't mind the constant motion, and I do mean constant!

I was one of those naysayers who thought that good parenting solved problems like that, or if we only allowed our boys to act like boys they'd have an outlet for their energy.

I was WRONG. Somebody has to be at the far end of the spectrum. Right? I mean everyone gets depressed at some point, but we're not all labelled depressed. However, there are those people at the very far end of the spectrum who are so depressed they have to be hospitalized or take medications. There are some people at the far end of "this" spectrum for whom medication is a great help. The problem is that too many people in our society now view a large segment of kids as having a problem, instead of just acting like normal kids.