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Girl Scouts Want You To Die
American.com ^ | 2/26/07 | Katherine Mangu-Ward

Posted on 03/04/2007 7:15:02 AM PST by Valin

My local liquor store is selling Girl Scout cookies, and last week I chose Thin Mints over gin, thinking myself quite virtuous. Little did I know… According to MeMe Roth, who is the head (and may be the sole member) of National Action Against Obesity:

Girl Scouts have an economic, medical and moral imperative to dump junk food as their $700 million fundraising source….Girl Scout Cookies are high-calorie, high-sugar, high in saturated fat and nearly devoid of nutrition. Using young girls as a front to push millions of cookies onto an already bloated population further exacerbates an alarming [obesity] crisis, no matter how cute the uniforms are.

Could it be true that little girls are selling sin door-to-door in exchange for merit badges?

This strange little Girl-Scouts-cause-obesity trope has been making the rounds for a while now: The New York Times' Nicholas Kristof penned a column during last year's selling season in which he worried about the growing menace of "little girls intent on clogging your arteries and killing you with their sweetness." At least Kristof maintained a semi-satirical tone. He knew that he was proposing something on the silly side: "Actually, it's a pity that Girl Scout cookies are being sold by cherubs," he wrote. "If the sellers were Iranians with turbans and menacing frowns, then the authorities might be more alert to the dangers."

Even before Kristof, a television ad produced by the pro-business Center for Consumer Freedom put a Girl Scout on the stand to demonstrate the absurdity of obesity-related lawsuits. "You make them taste good on purpose, don't you?" a sinister trial lawyer asks a beribboned, beanie-wearing defendant.

But now Roth has done it for real—and with little discernable humor. "I’ve always cringed at young females identifying themselves with baked goods," she says. "And I’m not convinced more cookies makes the world a better place."

But of course, more cookies do make the world a better place—as anyone who has ever had a crunchy, coconut-y, chocolate-dipped Samoa can attest. People buy Girl Scout cookies because they are good cookies for a good cause. Most people buy (and eat) them in moderation, so a boycott isn't changing health outcomes for the vast majority of cookie customers. And as Roth rightly points out, the Girl Scouts rely on the cookies for $700 million in revenue every year, revenue that they are unlikely to be able to replace with other sources—even in the five-year transition time graciously allotted to them by Roth.

More choices don't make people fat, bad choices make people fat. In the case of Girl Scout cookies, more choices could even make you thinner. The Girl Scouts experiment with new flavors every year, and have removed trans fats from this year's batch. The new flavors tend to be low fat or boast some other health conscious modification. A boycott (girlcott?) against all Girl Scout cookies by the most health-conscious segment of consumers is unlikely to encourage more experimentation.

This isn't Roth's first anti-fat publicity stunt. She also hosts the Wedding Gown Challenge, which encourages women to do annual checks to make sure that they still fit into their wedding gowns: "Most women I know commit fraud on their wedding days—they weigh-in for the walk down the aisle with no expectation of maintaining that weight year after year." (When I visited, Google Ads for eating disorder treatments graced the right column of her main page—but, for the record, she also discourages "extreme" pre-wedding dieting.)

Roth's message of personal responsibility, and her use of a boycott rather than a lawsuit or a legislative ban are to be applauded. But she is still on the wrong track. Scapegoating particular foods or companies (remember the lawsuit blaming McDonalds for obesity?) isn't a sensible approach. There isn't a single man, woman, or child in America who thinks that Thin Mints are slimming, name notwithstanding. Adorable salesgirls in knee socks are not tricking buyers or leading them down the garden path, most people just buy a box or two of nostalgic cookies once a year for kicks. They know what they're getting.

And what could be more American than Girl Scout cookies? The scouts have been selling cookies since 1917. Roth says that they "sell up to 200 million boxes yearly—that's about one box for every overweight American." But one box of cookies a year each, for a total of 1,350 calories, isn't too bad—certainly not enough to add an extra roll to anyone's midsection or roll anyone into an early grave.

Actually, there is one thing that's more American than Thin Mints and Trefoils: apple pie. Grandmothers across the nation, beware. Unless you fit into your wedding dress—MeMe Roth could be coming for your pie pans next.

Katherine Mangu-Ward is associate editor at Reason magazine.


TOPICS: Culture/Society; Editorial
KEYWORDS: cookiemadness; fatnazis; foodnazis; girlscoutcookies; girlscouts; memeroth
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To: mtg

The headline on this article should be considered hate speech. No one in their right mind could ever think the Girl scouts would mean to harm anyone. The woman who wrote this must have been expelled from a girl scout troop somewhere in her past for prostitution or some such.


101 posted on 03/04/2007 4:01:05 PM PST by sgtbono2002 (I will forgive Jane Fonda, when the Jews forgive Hitler.)
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To: poindexter
I need Girl Scout Cookies like I need a hole in the head. What I do whenever I pass a troop selling cookies is to give them a $1 donation. It turns out that the troop gets to keep 100% of a donation, but gets just a few cents for every box of cookies they sell. So my $1 donation is cheaper for me, healthier for me, and helps the troop more. Win, win, win.

Former "Cookie Mom" chiming in, here --

When I went through "cookie training," I was appalled to find out how much the actual cost of a box is. In 2001 it was -- brace yourselves -- $.73. Each regional council sets the cookie price -- back then it was $3 a box. The regional council and the national GSUSA gets the bulk of the cash with a minor percentage going to the actual troop.

The Detroit council, unsurprisingly, was big-time in the red. They hiked the box prices to $3.50. Customers were so outraged they'd go to the nearby suburbs to buy the cookies. I drew the line at the $3 price and swore I'd never sell cookies for more than that.

My daughter got bored with the scouts and didn't rejoin a new troop when we moved.

Still, there's nothing like Thin Mints straight out of the freezer. Mmmmmmmm.....

102 posted on 03/04/2007 4:14:55 PM PST by Kieri (A Grafted Branch (Rom. 11))
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To: Valin

If they'd price it right, I'd prefer they sell ammo.


103 posted on 03/04/2007 5:17:07 PM PST by GingisK
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To: Tax-chick

I've said it before, and I will say it again.....you are a far, FAR better woman than I could ever be. It's apparent Anoreth is following in your footsteps.


104 posted on 03/04/2007 5:27:48 PM PST by Gabz (I like mine with lettuce and tomato, heinz57 and french-fried potatoes)
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To: Valin

I refuse to buy the low-fat versions (of Girl Scout cookies or anything else). Not surprisingly, I am quite slender. Low-fat translates into high-carb, and both translate into lower blood sugar soon after eating them, hence more hunger after eating them, and hence further eating which is likely to go into the excessive calories range. Eat a couple of nice full-fat cookies and you'll be quite satisfied.


105 posted on 03/04/2007 5:29:03 PM PST by GovernmentShrinker
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To: Gabz

Anoreth can chew nails and spit barbed wire. If she joins the military when she's 18, as she currently intends (intentions change overnight at this age, of course), the world will notice!


106 posted on 03/04/2007 5:31:42 PM PST by Tax-chick (Every "choice" has a direct object.)
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To: Valin

There was a time when GS cookies at least tasted good, but that was decades ago. Now they are at the bottom of the quality heap, and the GS don't even get much of the total take. Big waste. If you wnnt to donate, then do it, but forget the cookies.


107 posted on 03/04/2007 5:38:48 PM PST by editor-surveyor (Turning the general election into a second Democrat primary is not a winning strategy.)
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To: burroak

Actually the national Girl Scouts organization licenses 2 cookie manufacturers -- one is a Kellog subsidiary, and the other is a subsidiary of some other larger food maufacturer. Those two then compete for the business of the various regional councils, which are free to choose which to order from. As a result neither manufacturer is in a position to extract an inordinately high price for the cookies it sells to troops. Sometimes older Girl Scouts are brought along to participate in negotiations with the manufacturers, to learn some business basics.


108 posted on 03/04/2007 5:51:27 PM PST by GovernmentShrinker
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To: editor-surveyor

Right. I'm gonna tell my boss that I don't want to buy his daughters cookies...that'll go over real well.


109 posted on 03/04/2007 5:59:24 PM PST by Valin (History takes time. It is not an instant thing.)
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To: Tax-chick

Well that is a situation (if it comes to pass) where I can honestly say - THEY need to be afraid, VERY afraid!


110 posted on 03/04/2007 5:59:24 PM PST by Gabz (I like mine with lettuce and tomato, heinz57 and french-fried potatoes)
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To: Right Angler; MHGinTN
No...not gin...try a nice chocolate liquer. Thin Mints are the best cookie ever produced. Ever.

Former Troop leader here...and we did alot of fun things with the money our cookie sales brought in. We did 'booth' sales...outside local grocery stores or WalMart; after church services on Sundays, etc. The girls had to show up (w/a parent and work the booth to make $$ towards our trips). We traveled quite a bit...NYC, Toronto, DC...sold alot of cookies and it was fun :) My daughter is now a college senior...years go too fast...but one can enjoy the quickly passing days with THIN MINTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

111 posted on 03/04/2007 6:03:04 PM PST by PennsylvaniaMom (It takes a GAL to put the FUN in FUNeral!!)
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To: Valin

Man what a miserable person this woman must be..

The food police know no bounds, and now they are coming for your girl scout cookies.

Just like some laughed at smoking bans years ago, "junk food" bans are coming..


112 posted on 03/04/2007 6:06:12 PM PST by eXe (Si vis pacem, para bellum)
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To: editor-surveyor
.........and the GS don't even get much of the total take.

Not true, what each troop, and each council, get is based upon volume of sale, the more sales the higher the take. Of course the company that makes them is going to get their cut, but the girls do get a lot.

But hey - we LOVE the direct donations!!!!!

113 posted on 03/04/2007 6:06:59 PM PST by Gabz (I like mine with lettuce and tomato, heinz57 and french-fried potatoes)
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To: PennsylvaniaMom

One problem with thin mints ... they're addictive. When I buy them, I have them with hot, freshly ground coffee. Soaking them in alcohol was a joke ... ruin the cookie doing that!


114 posted on 03/04/2007 6:07:37 PM PST by MHGinTN (If you've had life support. Promote life support for others.)
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To: MHGinTN
Try Folgers Gourmet Chocolate Truffle Coffee (you will thank me!!!) Sweeten with Splenda Mocha Blend (and a little cremer) to 'compliment' your Thin Mints. Zero carbs/calories in the java when you use the Splenda...so you can enjoy more Thin Mints (and support your local GS).

You will really, really love the combo :)

115 posted on 03/04/2007 6:12:39 PM PST by PennsylvaniaMom (It takes a GAL to put the FUN in FUNeral!!)
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To: Valin

Hey, I'm not your shrink! ;o)


116 posted on 03/04/2007 6:26:23 PM PST by editor-surveyor (Turning the general election into a second Democrat primary is not a winning strategy.)
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To: editor-surveyor
HALLELUJAH
117 posted on 03/04/2007 6:34:17 PM PST by Valin (History takes time. It is not an instant thing.)
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To: eXe

It is Food Police. These crabby nay-sayers just make me WANT to eat GS cookies, trans fats, french fries -- you name it. They are 'always winter and never Christmas' people.


118 posted on 03/04/2007 8:48:48 PM PST by bboop (Stealth Tutor)
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To: Valin

They only come around once a year. It's ok to splurge once in a while.


119 posted on 03/04/2007 9:24:55 PM PST by Peace Is Coming
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To: Valin

Funny how there's probably more coverage of GS cookies being fattening than there is of certain GS councils working with Planned Parenthood to indoctrinate girls into the culture of death.


120 posted on 03/05/2007 11:25:12 AM PST by Mr. Silverback ("Logic" is as meaningless to a liberal as "desert" is to a fish.--Freeper IronJack)
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