Posted on 02/03/2007 10:22:53 PM PST by freedomdefender
Pornography is a "dirty little secret" and people are logging on to look at it, more than ever. They're doing it at home and at work. For some, it's an obsession.
"It felt like a high. It felt like, just an uncontrollable urge," said Justin VanAntwerp.
On the outside, Justin Van Antwerp "appeared" to have great life. He was a minister, who had a wife and two little girls. No one knew he was addicted to porn. It all started when he looked a playboy magazine when he was a teenager. "Then, that wouldn't satisfy. Then I found a whole new world of videos and webcams and all those sorts of things," said Antwerp. “I never got caught. I got really good at covering things up."
Justin is among the growing number of men and women who are dealing with pornography addiction. You used to have to go to an adult video store to get it. Now, you can see it all online.
Pornography on the internet is a 57-billion dollar industry. It's larger than all professional sports. There are 4.2 million pornographic websites. Those who view it are 72% male.
Justin was looking at pornography at home and at work.
Looking at pornography while at work isn't all that uncommon. Computer company Trivalent says they've investigated cases of pornography use at work, most are kept private, but in the case of the Cutlerville Fire department, where pornographic images were found on computers, the case ended up catching the media's attention. Trivalent says businesses need to take a pro-active approach.
"What can we do to stop that from happening to begin with? We implement things like content filtering." Richard Reiffer, Chief Technical Officer for Trivalent.
Dr. Paul Critelli sees patients who have all kinds of addictions. He's not surprised that pornography addiction is becoming more common. He says Americans have a different view of sex and nudity compared to people in other countries. American beliefs that nudity and sex should be kept out of view, create an addictive urge for some to get their eyes on it.
Psychologists say viewing porn at work is a sign that you have a problem. Other questions to ask include: Frequency - Are you logging on more often? Intensity - Are the pictures becoming more graphic? Duration - Are the sessions online becoming longer?
"If those things are increasing by jumps or rather steadily, I would say you have a problem. Those attributes are a good measure of any kind of problem behavior," said Critelli.
Critelli believes there are cases where people can view porn and not have a problem. He doesn't think small amounts are morally wrong or necessarily dangerous for a relationship, but psychologist Tom Karel disagrees.
"It creates unrealistic expectations and unrealistic ideas to what normal really looks like," said Karel.
In Justin's case, pornography ruined his relationship with his wife. He says he hit rock bottom when he picked up a female hitchhiker. " Nothing happened, but had the opportunity arisen, I would have cheated on my wife that day. That was a scary place to be."
A few months later, Justin told his wife about his addiction.
“She was devastated, and she left the following weekend. The next morning, I met with the elders of the church and resigned my position."
Justin went into therapy and is now involved with a local anti-pornography group called XXX Church. Justin hopes, by coming out about his problem, he can show others, that they can overcome their addiction.
“By God's grace, people lifting me up, I've been able to get a hold on it."
What? That free sample didn't do it for you? I have more!!
Thanks; I've just been cured of my porn addiction....;^)
That was an ugly thing to do flash bunny. You post has struck me down blind for life.
Am I mistaken this is the view in most cultures? Burkahs for example. And you mean Europeans are not obsessed with sex? Puleeze.
LoL...
and if she had stayed in that house with a porn addict with two little girls and something happened to those two little girls YOU would probably be the first to deride her for staying.....
.., with this sad news , oh my , I'm crushed [sex magazines in a firehouse!!]
next there'll be an expose' about firemen "bending their elbows" , I sure the public will be Up In Arms /srcsm
And why don't real men view porn? Because they know that, no matter how good looking the woman may be, some guy is tired of putting up with her ..... stuff.
"Show me just what Mohammed brought that was new, and there you will find things only evil and inhuman, such as his command to spread by the sword the faith he preached." - Manuel II Palelologus
I thought the same thing. I'm not defending his behavior, but she could have given the situation some time to resolve.
"A few months later, Justin told his wife about his addiction.
“She was devastated, and she left the following weekend. The next morning, I met with the elders of the church and resigned my position."
Nice of them to be so fast to "hate the sin, but love the sinner."
I wonder what flavor of church he attends, 'cause his wife sure left fast. Were there other reasons her marriage vows were so quickly cancelled?
LOL!! Well, they say gender identity is a continuum...
He says "I'm a Euroweenie! In Europe evwyfwing is bettah than in Amewwica!"
Good one, First time I laughed tonight.
A good one. Thanks for the smile.
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