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To: spinestein

My child spent half of her childhood with only me in the home. She was also the best behaved child on our block. And all the other kids came from two-parent homes. An only parent, even a mother, CAN effectively parent and discipline. And I had a very difficult child.


26 posted on 01/09/2007 1:18:31 PM PST by twigs
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To: twigs

So she was "best behaved" and "difficult"?


35 posted on 01/09/2007 2:15:40 PM PST by ECM (Government is a make-work program for lawyers.)
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To: twigs

[An only parent, even a mother, CAN effectively parent and discipline. And I had a very difficult child.]


I agree, and I've seen quite a few examples of well behaved and respectful children raised by single parents, as well as spoiled, ill-behaved children in traditional households.

But the task of instilling discipline in children is inherently more difficult with only one proper authority figure (no matter how consistently good at parenting) than with two present in the same home. When my wife departed in 2001, my daughter became "a very difficult child" as well. It's taken a whole lot of extra effort to keep her on the right path, essentially having to do all the duties of two parents, myself. From what you wrote, I can guess that you're as familiar as I am (and with so many others, now) with just how much harder it is to be both the mom and the dad at the same time.

Now that my daughter is thirteen, I find that I'm inadequate as the female role model that she needs (and badly misses) but I don't know how to provide that for her at this time. In a similar way, teenage boys need a strong male role model living with them to demonstrate, by example, how a proper man should be strong and robust while always practicing restraint and self discipline.


46 posted on 01/09/2007 11:49:19 PM PST by spinestein (Remember to follow the Brazen Rule!)
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To: twigs

Amen to that. My dd had no trouble understanding I meant exactly what I said, because I followed thru with an actual punishment.

She's been a delight as a consequence.


56 posted on 01/10/2007 5:52:04 AM PST by cinives (On some planets what I do is considered normal.)
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