Time to tell hubbby a few facts of life. Let husband calculate the costs of hiring all the things stay at home moms do. Start with childcare, add laundry, house cleaning, cooking, running errands, paying bills, scheduling appointments, and all the unheralded rest of it.
Tell him to either write his wife a check for the amount he would pay for others to do all this work or STFU and put in some OT. And be damn grateful his baby is safe at home with a loving mother that puts him or her first.
Maybe the materialism center in my brain is broken...I just assumed that kids=a bit of financial sacrifice.
And then she should write him a check back, for half the rent/house payment, half the utilities, her share of the groceries, rent on the appliances, etc., etc. Just to be fair.
Or, alternatively, they could agree that they are a team, with each filling an essential position. They could work together to set their priorities. If being together as a family is their priority, they could agree to a less-expensive lifestyle. If a fancy lifestyle is their priority, then they should pay for professional daycare and get the mom out maximizing her earning potential.
carolyn
And Hubby gets no time with his kids. Gee, that's fair. And, what's even more ridiculous are the women out there that have husbands willing to bust ass to make the rent so she can stay home with the kids (I know, playgroup, talking on the phone to Mom, sister, girlfriends, going to park, etc is soooooo hard) who then want to either split the household stuff 50/50 or complain that he is never home....
So who did those things before the children came? They didn't hire anyone (more than likely), they did it themselves, while both working full time jobs. Thus, your argument is a non-starter.
Tell him to either write his wife a check for the amount he would pay for others to do all this work or STFU and put in some OT. And be damn grateful his baby is safe at home with a loving mother that puts him or her first.
You're entirely missing the point. When your income drops by 40%, as is typical when the wife stops working, you need to adjust your standard of living accordingly. In other words, live within your means. What the husband complains of is his wife's refusal to live within their means.