[Artemis Webb]

I really doubt you are "rolling on the floor laughing your ass off". If you were you would not be able to type at your keyboard.

Formal postal worker?

Failed the psych test huh?

[muawiyah]

Hey, it's actually better than the dream. Some time back USPS decided that dog bites were entirely too expensive. They began going to court to recover damages from the owners of those dogs.

At the same time, and this really warms my heart, they began pulling street/door delivery from neighborhoods (or rural routes) where an owner refused to curb his dog.

Dog bites plummeted.

Psych test? Naw ~ I've gone along on route evaluations and other pieces of postal business out on the streets and it's simply amazing how lax many dog owners are.