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Women more likely to be perpetrators of abuse as well as victims
University of Florida News ^ | Thursday July 13, 2006 | Cathy Keen

Posted on 07/13/2006 2:10:55 PM PDT by srotaG adirolF

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To: RipSawyer; marajade
O.K., you two.

I suspect we may have a case here of marajade being married to the only man in the world who understands her; and of RipSawyer being married to the only woman he has found who understands him.

I also suspect that if the two of you had gotten together it probably would not have been a successful union. Fair to say?

Those of us who are fortunate enough to find ourselves in blissfully happy marriages may well have found the only/ideal person for us, as well. Otherwise, we would likely be among the lonley divorced folks who end up not caring much for the opposite sex.

Can we kiss and make up? LOL

 

SoS

41 posted on 09/10/2006 2:11:13 PM PDT by Song of the South ( = Zip-a-dee-doo-dah =)
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To: Song of the South

I'm still on first marriage as is my husband. And we use "pet names" in re: to each other all the time. We just make sure they are positive. I would never hesitate to call him "sweety" in public at all. And he if objected to that, I feel I'd certainly have cause to be angry with him.


42 posted on 09/10/2006 2:17:49 PM PDT by marajade (Yes, I'm a SW freak!)
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To: Song of the South; RipSawyer

RipSawyer posted that he never met a woman who accepted blame for their divorce and then proceeded to post his current wife did before marrying him. Either she did or she didn't, which is it?


43 posted on 09/10/2006 2:19:07 PM PDT by marajade (Yes, I'm a SW freak!)
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To: Song of the South

Can we kiss and make up? LOL


>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Only if you promise to find me a high quality copy of the movie you use as your screen name. I have a low quality reproduction but I think it is a wonderful movie and it is a shame that it was taken off the market under the pretense that it has some kind of diabolical racial message to it, Uncle Remus was my hero when I was a small boy learning to read. I still remember when all the characters seemed as real to me as my own family.


44 posted on 09/10/2006 2:19:31 PM PDT by RipSawyer (Does anybody still believe this is a free country?)
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To: marajade

Either she did or she didn't, which is it?

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

You need to read more carefully, I said that she accepts the blame for marrying him in the first place. Having made that error I fail to see how anyone could blame her for correcting it by divorcing him. I can promise that if you had ever spent a day with that man you would find me incredibly attractive by comparison.


45 posted on 09/10/2006 2:24:30 PM PDT by RipSawyer (Does anybody still believe this is a free country?)
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To: RipSawyer

"I did not meet a single woman who would admit that the divorce was her fault."

Your quote in your post 19. I do read carefully.


46 posted on 09/10/2006 2:27:16 PM PDT by marajade (Yes, I'm a SW freak!)
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To: RipSawyer
Song of the South (1946)

Uncle Remus: There's other ways of learnin' 'bout the behind feet of a mule than gettin' kicked by him, sure as I'm named Remus. And just because these here tales is about critters like Br'er Rabbit an' Br'er Fox, that don't mean it can't happen to folks! So 'scuse me for sayin' so, but them who can't learn from a tale about critters, just ain't got the ears tuned for listenin'.

 

There was a wisdom and a gentleness in the movie --- and it portrays people in a simpler manner --- the way they once were. Uncle Remus was and is dear to the hearts of many of us.

I would have to find two good quality copies of the movie --- one for me and one for you. If you find one first, pick one up for me, too.

 

SoS


47 posted on 09/10/2006 2:29:47 PM PDT by Song of the South ( = Zip-a-dee-doo-dah =)
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To: marajade

Your quote in your post 19. I do read carefully

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Do you not comprehend the difference between, "I caused the divorce by my actions during the marriage" and "I made a mistake by marrying him"?


48 posted on 09/10/2006 2:34:32 PM PDT by RipSawyer (Does anybody still believe this is a free country?)
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To: RipSawyer

What is the diff?


49 posted on 09/10/2006 2:35:48 PM PDT by marajade (Yes, I'm a SW freak!)
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To: marajade

What is the diff?

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Admitting to marrying the wrong person is not in any way saying that you did anything to cause the divorce, only that you entered a marriage that you never should have entered. I have met many women who said this same thing. It is really just another way of saying that the divorce was his fault. In my wife's case I believe that having made the initial mistake she made every effort to hold the marriage together but it would have been impossible given the sort of man she married. Given a different upbringing he might have been a better man but he never overcame all the crazy things that happened to him while growing up. I never said that ALL those women who blamed the man were wrong, just that some of them had to be at fault and I never met one who accepted the responsibility in the way that some men do.


50 posted on 09/10/2006 2:49:11 PM PDT by RipSawyer (Does anybody still believe this is a free country?)
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To: RipSawyer

"Admitting to marrying the wrong person is not in any way saying that you did anything to cause the divorce, only that you entered a marriage that you never should have entered."

That implies "fault" to me. Was she or wasn't she?


51 posted on 09/10/2006 2:55:47 PM PDT by marajade (Yes, I'm a SW freak!)
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To: marajade

That implies "fault" to me. Was she or wasn't she?

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

If you don't believe there is any difference between those two things then I see no point in further discussion, we simply agree to disagree.


52 posted on 09/10/2006 2:58:12 PM PDT by RipSawyer (Does anybody still believe this is a free country?)
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To: RipSawyer

Sheesh, sounds like her husband has quite the bundle of joy, eh. Nitpicking one word at a time.


53 posted on 09/10/2006 3:03:49 PM PDT by IDontLikeToPayTaxes
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To: IDontLikeToPayTaxes; RipSawyer

"Sheesh, sounds like her husband has quite the bundle of joy, eh. Nitpicking one word at a time."

I stand up for myself as a woman. And guess what? My husband respects it in me and encourages me.


54 posted on 09/10/2006 3:06:23 PM PDT by marajade (Yes, I'm a SW freak!)
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To: IDontLikeToPayTaxes

Sheesh, sounds like her husband has quite the bundle of joy, eh. Nitpicking one word at a time.

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Ya think maybe somebody else made a mistake? 8 0 )


55 posted on 09/10/2006 3:19:32 PM PDT by RipSawyer (Does anybody still believe this is a free country?)
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To: srotaG adirolF

I think that we are finally out of the feminist "all women are innocent victims" era. That took awhile.


56 posted on 09/10/2006 3:22:10 PM PDT by TChad
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To: IDontLikeToPayTaxes
If the roles were reversed, you would've done a year or two in the clinker and have a record as a "domestic abuser".

I've seen many episodes of COPS where the guy is arrested on the woman's word alone, even if she doesn't have a mark on her. The woman doesn't get arrested unless the guy has visible injuries. Even in those cases, she has to be screaming and belligerent, and she gets a ton more benefit of the doubt than the guy does.

57 posted on 09/10/2006 3:35:21 PM PDT by Excuse_My_Bellicosity ("A litany of complaints is not a plan." - GW Bush, referring to DNC's lack of a platform on ANYTHING)
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To: Excuse_My_Bellicosity

"I've seen many episodes of COPS where the guy is arrested on the woman's word alone, even if she doesn't have a mark on her."

That might be because its the law.


58 posted on 09/10/2006 3:36:44 PM PDT by marajade (Yes, I'm a SW freak!)
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To: marajade
That's fine if it goes both ways. It's true that the cops have a lot of rules and regulations put on them that are ridiuculous. And I think that the law and the cops are catching up to the fact that it's not always the guy that's the problem and the woman is always innocent.

I was reading a story about a woman who was addicted to meth and got off of it. She was saying that 15 years ago, the cops busted in her boyfriend's house (she and another girlfriend were there, too) on a raid. The cops found several ounces of meth, scales, and packaging materials. Her boyfriend was arrested and drugs and paraphernalia were confiscated. What's interesting was that the boyfriend was arrested, the two women were left behind. They were briefly asked if they were involved in the drugs, of course they said "no", and that was it. After the cops left, the two women were just sitting there asking each other, "How the hell are we not in jail right now???"

That wouldn't happen today. Today, the women would be hitting the floor just as hard as the guys and they would be doing time just like them.

59 posted on 09/10/2006 3:57:55 PM PDT by Excuse_My_Bellicosity ("A litany of complaints is not a plan." - GW Bush, referring to DNC's lack of a platform on ANYTHING)
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To: Excuse_My_Bellicosity

"That's fine if it goes both ways."

I believe the law does.


60 posted on 09/10/2006 4:04:19 PM PDT by marajade (Yes, I'm a SW freak!)
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