Posted on 06/26/2006 1:25:47 PM PDT by Dane
Posted by Chuck Muth June 25, 2006 at 4:46 pm
JOHN JACOB DINGLE-BERRY SCHMIDT
The old axiom that Republicans never blow an opportunity to blow an opportunity has never been more in play than in this Tuesday’s GOP primary race in Utah’s 3rd congressional district.
Challenger John Jacob had the money to credibly take on incumbent Rep. Chris Cannon. And he had the hottest of red-hot issues: illegal immigration. Cannon, after all, is well known as a champion of amnesty for illegal aliens and Jacob has been successfully pounding him on it. In addition, Rep. Tom Tancredo’s Team America PAC, led by fire-breathing pit-bull Bay Buchanan, has been hammering Cannon unmercifully in radio ads urging voters to support Jacob.
On issue after issue, Cannon and Jacob, both conservative Republicans, generally found themselves in agreement. But on the immigration issue, they were polar opposites. The entire race, with national implications, would likely turn on this one issue. And the tide was running in Jacob’s direction.
And then the wheels started popping off the apple cart…
IS THAT MY FOOT? HERE, LET ME SHOOT IT
First came the story about how Jacob had unlawfully given money to an immigrant family. Oops. There are details and explanations to the story…but what kind of voter pays attention to details?
Then there was the story about Jacob’s “gambling problem.” Jacob, a Mormon, eventually admitted to gambling in Las Vegas during the Nationals Finals Rodeo…a no-no according to the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. Oops, again.
Then Jacob was forced to admit he had his figures regarding the number of illegals in a Utah prison all wrong. On the campaign trail, Jacob had been telling audiences that 40 percent of prisoners in the Central Utah Correctional Facility were illegal aliens. This week, he had to admit that it was only 8 percent. Oops.
Then last Tuesday, Tad Walch of the Deseret Morning News reported on Jacob’s “FastPass” idea for illegal aliens based roughly on Disneyland’s ticket program which allows some people to go straight to the front of the line. Apparently, Jacob is thinking that illegals who can prove they’ve been in the U.S. for 10 or 20 years would return to the their home country and obtain a FastPass which would put them at the front of the immigration line and allow them to return to the U.S. legally.
To which The Amnesty King responded: “It sounds like what some supporting you call an amnesty.”
Um, yeah.
THE DEVIL MADE ME DO IT
But punting away the winning amnesty issue and all the rest could likely be the least of the Jacob campaign’s worries. On Friday he went off the deep end, likely scaring the be-jeepers out of even the most religious of conservatives in Utah and around the country. Here’s the campaign-crushing Associated Press story from Friday…
“Republican congressional hopeful John Jacob believes the devil is impeding his efforts to unseat five-term Representative Chris Cannon. He says there’s another force that wants to keep him from going to Washington and the devil is what it is. Jacob says that since he decided to run for Congress, Satan has disrupted his business deals, preventing him from putting as much money into the race as he had hoped.”
What the…?
And this wasn’t just a one-time slip of the tongue in the middle of a bad Timothy Leary-like acid trip. Jacob first blamed devil for his campaign troubles at an immigration event on Wednesday, and then reiterated the claim in front of Salt Lake Tribune editors the very next day. And already the story has traveled halfway around the world.
“A candidate seeking the Republican nomination for a Congressional seat in Utah has blamed the devil for problems with his campaign,” reports London’s The Independent newspaper today. “John Jacob, a businessman aiming to oust Republican incumbent Chris Cannon in a party primary this week, told The Salt Lake Tribune that since he had decided to try for Congress, the devil had disrupted his business deals…” The paper added that “Mr. Jacob asked the (Tribune) not to quote him about Satan because he would be marked as ‘one of those screw-loose people’.”
Gee, do ya think?
Now, I know Mormons are very religious folks, but even the most devout must be scratching their heads this weekend wondering if Jacob might be a few fries short of a Happy Meal. As one fellow Mormon close to this race wrote to me after reading about this bizarre charge: “He’s toast. Extra crispy.”
DO YOU BELIEVE IN MIRACLES?
The Jacob campaign is now in full panic mode, with the candidate trying to explain away the unexplainable. “I think the way I tried to explain it was in the last ten months I’ve had more adversity than I’ve had in the last ten years,” Jacob is now saying. “So chalk it up to whom you’d like.”
Um, how ’bout the Tooth Fairy?
The supreme irony here is that Cannon is every bit the “loose screw” that Jacob now appears to be. He once told me face-to-face after the impeachment hearings that he believed the Chinese had implanted a chip into Bill Clinton’s head and that the former president was completely under the control of the ChiComs.
OK, OK. Maybe that’s NOT quite as bizarre as the devil stuff. But it’s close.
In any event, it now appears that the best opportunity to take out the Provo Prevaricator has gone up in smoke. Then again, if the devil can mess up Jacob, maybe the Big Guy upstairs - who, after all, does work in mysterious ways - can still pull out a miracle on Tuesday. Let us pray…
I'm sorry, I should have pinged you to post #120
You have way to much to time on your hands. I don't want any of those things, what I would like to see is education, welfare,and tort reform.
Good question, Dane never wants to tell us why for sure. He goes back and forth between claiming they're doing jobs "no one wants to do" like picking lettuce and the liberal line that they're only here for a better life and we'd be racists and xenophobes not to let them in. Dane, could you clear it up for us, which is it?
That's one distinct possibility. Another is that he is a hired gun troll for those interests, a Snakehead clone. Another is that he is one of those illegal aliens, or is related to the same. Another is that he might be a supplier/recruiter for places like Tyson.
Since his modus operandi is to smear, throw around strawmen and ad hominems, and then bail or change subjects whenever anyone confronts him with facts or kicks over his shibboleths, it's hard to be sure of anything except his continual dishonesty.
Probably a vacation residence. Her main residence no doubt is in a NO VA DC suburb.
But you prefer a candidate in favor of all the things I mentioned, and more, over a candidate who isn't.
Since his modus operandi is to smear, throw around strawmen and ad hominems, and then bail or change subjects whenever anyone confronts him with facts or kicks over his shibboleths, it's hard to be sure of anything except his continual dishonesty.
You tancredoites sure love your conspiracy theories, LOL!
Yep I'll prefer a 100% ACU cnandidate like Chris Cannon anyday.
Dane, at least she does have a residence there and is familiar with the state and the way people there think. Have you ever been to Utah? Just curious.
Bay is LDS and her son goes to BYU. That's Latter-Day Saint (Mormon) and Brigham Young University to those of you who live outside the Intermountain West and don't understand how we "hicks" talk.
Nope, and as for her residence it probably is in some vacation resort, not exactly "real Utahan" country.
Even if he is tied to Abramoff? What makes you think Jacob won't have as good or better all around rating?
Those are strong possibilities and at least one is probably the real reason. The "they come here and pick our lettuce" routine is just a front no doubt.
~ROTFLOL~ you have no idea how silly you sound... at least be familiar with a state before you try to tell them how to run their politics..... BTW, shouldn't you be putting all this effort into helping Diana Irey? or is she too anti-illegal immigration for you and you're supporting Murtha instead?
Fine Chris Cannon was born and raised there.
Oh silly me for poitning that out.
Yeah, that's it Dane. It's a conspiracy to make you look like an idiot. Notice how I cleverly tricked you into throwing out another ad hominem, just to make you look bad.
p.s.: They really did take your strawberry ice cream.
and...... you have a point?
That's surprising. Isn't Pat Buchanan a pretty staunch Catholic?
Yep... Dane really knows more about Utah and Mormon Politics than Bay.
Jacob will lose by at least 10 points, and he could have won. It isn't a matter of not being "slick with the press." It's a matter of outrageously bad judgment, and some really weird beliefs about Satan involving himself in a House race. Doesn't happen.
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