Teens new obsession: self abuse

financial express ^ | 6/5/06 | ap

[nmh]

"I would associate it with the stress level, pure and simple. In earlier, simpler times the stress level was generally lower, and/or the people had better coping skills. Given enough stress, everyone would snap."

so you believe cutting yourself or burning yourself is normal when stressed?

I doubt that there is a person on this forum that hasn't been stressed to some degree ... and yet they most likely don't cut, burn or mutilate themselves. From your viewpoint - why aren't they abusing themselves?

[The Brush]

I view piercing and tattoos as self mutilation. (Cutting oneself is mutilation, not just abuse) 2000 years ago Christ said we are in the end times and that things will get worse. Over the years things have gotten worse, then better than worse again... it seems a natural progression (like global warming)
Satan has a much better grip on kids these days. The more they have the more they feel they're missing.
When I was younger (in the 50's) our churches and Sunday Schools were full. Confirmation classes had 40 to 50 kids, today there are 3-5 kids being confirmed and the churches have trouble paying their utility bills.
The more we progress it seems the more we regress.
I am afraid for our Nation but I know that God is in charge. How long will it take until he redeems this world?

[TypeZoNegative]

They're dinosaur bands that suck, that's what happened to them.

And about Modest Mouse; they have been around ever since I was in high school, and that was 10 years ago.

[nmh]

"These young folks are in a great deal of pain, emotionally, and spiritually and I don't see it getting better in the near future."

I agree with you.

It will only get worse. Look how early children are abandoned by their parent(s) - as infants so Mom/Dad can chase $$$. The material aspect isn't cutting it. They want time, LOVE and Christ in their hearts.

[The_Reader_David]

Here is a hypothesis: human beings actually need ascesis. Our society teaches the opposite--don't place serious demands on children or adolescents, everyone is entitled to 'do what you want (as long as you don't hurt, or offend, others)', 'self-esteem' (a vice according to St. John Cassian) must be protected.

So, the need for ascetic discipline bursts forth in bizarre (and actually demonic) ways.

[ErnBatavia]

That's really not the self-abuse I had in mind

I'm with you...these slicers need to find some new terminology, 'cause they're giving wanking a bad name.

[freekitty]

Says a lot about our nanny culture. Parents that aren't there, government that isn't either; but pretends to be.

[freekitty]

Oh yeah, all brought to you by Hillary and her damn psychotic village.

[GSlob]

First of all, we do not whow whether they abuse themselves or not, and if yes, then in what form. Secondly, we do not know the level of the stress they are/have been/ experiencing. One could argue that the level of stress is [in most cases] not high enough to cause "snapping". And "snapping", BTW, could take many forms - from suicide over what would seem to be trivial matters to taking it out on others. Self-mutilation is only one of these forms, and probably not the most frequent one, either.

[nmh]

"I view piercing and tattoos as self mutilation. (Cutting oneself is mutilation, not just abuse) 2000 years ago Christ said we are in the end times and that things will get worse. Over the years things have gotten worse, then better than worse again... it seems a natural progression (like global warming)
Satan has a much better grip on kids these days. The more they have the more they feel they're missing.
When I was younger (in the 50's) our churches and Sunday Schools were full. Confirmation classes had 40 to 50 kids, today there are 3-5 kids being confirmed and the churches have trouble paying their utility bills.
The more we progress it seems the more we regress.
I am afraid for our Nation but I know that God is in charge. How long will it take until he redeems this world?"

Brother do I relate!

To make it worse churches are watering down stuff, turning into community, entertainment centers with this phony feel good stuff. What they are hungry for is TRUTH. OFFENSIVE TRUTH that makes them THINK and rearrange their life along with encouragement. They are spiritually starved with no moral compass and churches are falling down on the job.

It all reminds me of Sodom and Gomorrah ... Churches are behaving like Lot. Instead of converting folks away from evil, they are being converted to it. They're not converting anyone. They're slowly joining them.

How much longer till He comes? No one knows but it will happen. He promised.

1Thes.4:17

[17] Then we which are alive and remain shall be caught up together with them in the clouds, to meet the Lord in the air: and so shall we ever be with the Lord.

I look forward to that. It's not that my life is a mess. I'm weary of hideous news and seeing the pace of moral decline picking up with the APPROVAL of people.

[nmh]

"First of all, we do not whow whether they abuse themselves or not, and if yes, then in what form. "

Huh? Cutting and burning yourself is NOT abuse? I don't know about you, but it sure isn't NORMAL for me and dare I say ANYONE else!

"Secondly, we do not know the level of the stress they are/have been/ experiencing. One could argue that the level of stress is [in most cases] not high enough to cause "snapping". And "snapping", BTW, could take many forms - from suicide over what would seem to be trivial matters to taking it out on others."

So YOU really believe that stress relief should or can include self mutilation, ie cutting or burning oneself? Many people "snap" but inflicting sadistic pain isn't the NORMAL or TYPICAL course of action. Drinking, drugs or suicide WERE more common. Stress is relative to the person but the action taken to relieve it - self abuse or mutilation is not the NORMAL way to relieve it.

"Self-mutilation is only one of these forms, and probably not the most frequent one, either."


Maybe you should read the whole article. It IS on the rise and becoming VERY common.

[dalight]

Well. I think the facts just don't support your withering and foolish conclusions.

Cutting is not something kids show to others, they hide it. It is something they do because they learn about it from friends. It feeds some strong needs and provides one heck of an endorphine kick.

Its addictive, and kids have a hard time stopping once they have tried it.

If you ever have the misfortune of having to deal with this, you better change your attitude.

The smart parent digs quick to find what is driving this and root it out like weeds in the garden. Then you have to watch and supervise as they find better ways of coping.

[dasboot]

Arf arf arf, I deal with these kids...several a week! Pardon my bad attitude.

[fatima]

I know kids that did it in grade school before 8th grade.

[The Brush]

To make it worse churches are watering down stuff, turning into community, entertainment centers with this phony feel good stuff. What they are hungry for is TRUTH. OFFENSIVE TRUTH that makes them THINK and rearrange their life along with encouragement. They are spiritually starved with no moral compass and churches are falling down on the job.
I used to attend a mega church near Chicago called Willow Creek... until the pastor invited Bill Clinton to speak at a seminar. Many in the church were angry and Bill Hybels actually spoke about his decision. He told us he had been traveling to see Clinton monthly throughout his time in office but never felt "led by the Holy Spirit" to discuss his personal behavior or his view of abortions etc.
After that discussion I decided that Hybels would never spend another dime of my money on anything. I have now found a neighborhood church and I'm part of a 70 person congregation. We've also got about 15 kids ranging in age from 5 to 17.
Our congregation is from all ethnic groups and we switch off worship leaders each week out of a pool of 5 so we can experience all types of music.
I don't think anyone in our congregation cuts themselves. I haven't even seen one tattoo!
One thing that's missing in our church, a secular view.

[varyouga]

Being a college student myself, I would say 1/5 is pretty accurate for girls. Some sleep around dangerously as a form of self-abuse. Some cut themselves and overdo drugs/alcohol. I know of multiple cases where this was going on.

A friend of mine attempted suicide just this last semester.

Our school has a very social/party atmosphere. I can't imagine what happens at more isolated schools.

[dalight]

I have a hard time believing your statement, but if you do, and in a position of authority, then you should stop dealing with these kids because you are obviously suffering from head up the tail syndrome.

I am praying for the kids you deal with and I hope you have to good sense not to actually try to help one.

[John Lenin]

I belive this is where the trend started.

[dalight]

Kids today are really stressed. Its hard to believe it. I remember High School and yea there was stress, but most kids had moms and dads and compared to now it was the age of Ozzie and Harriet rather than Ozzie Osborne.

Kids today face a life where families are unreliable, where having a fight in the parking lot will land you in jail, where balling your fist up in the hallway can get you suspended. Where every character on TV is jumping from bed to bed, and the extremes of behavior of the other kids is unbelievable.

We had clicks when I was young but they weren't proto gangs. The "preps" were the nerds when that term meant "College Prep" rather than mean self-involved rich kid.

I grew up in a world where one girl in my graduating class got pregnant before we graduated, not 10% of the 15 year olds having had their first child. Where oral sex was still defined as sex, and smoking and drugs were the things you fought against peer pressure. This is a world where 25 year old Mexicans make sport of trying to collect as many babies as possible from 13 and 14 year olds.

The number of openly gay kids male and female is exploding, and these kids live lives rich in turmoil and drag all that know them into the vortex.

This is a time when most kids know a kid with a gun, know a kid who has been jailed, and know a kid who has been killed. The guns I grew up with were owned by adults.

Schools are full of "drama" and if you look deeper into it, the question is often about abandonment. The toll on kids of broken home, broken marriages and fragmented and disconnected lives is just hard to explain.

It used to be that coming from a broken home was how one could explain someone turning criminal or acting out horrendously. Well, you take and make 60% of the families broken and you don't solve this. The kids who suffer from loss of their parents don't do this because they feel "different" the have trouble because of the chaos and heartbreak attending to the loss of a parent and the often continuous fighting for control and resources that come with fragmented families.

Not to put to fine a point on this, but this is the result of a very very failed experiment started in the 70's called Feminism. The idea was that the nuclear family "was the problem."

This is not all a time of gloom and doom. Many folks are getting a clue. The Feminist claptrap about men being the enemy, that careers are the only source of self worth, that so much more are being exposed as being a problem for most women, not a cure. Kids are missing both their Mothers and their Fathers right now. Moms and Dads are gone alot and stressed out too. Still, if you look at the statistics, things are getting better. Why? Because things like faith, values, morals are being held up as being important. People are fighting for this, pushing back the foolishness of permissiveness and political correctness. But it took 35 years to get into this fix and it will probably take another generation to see our way out if folks keep up the pressure. If they don't give in to despair. This is why it is so important not to lose our focus and keep our eyes on the prize of remaking the Courts, reinforcing marriage, supporting programs that emphasize personal choice and accountability.

Most of the kids doing this cutting are girls. Church and youth programs provided by your church are really important. Kids struggling with this are very rarely religious. Its funny, one of the most effective programs to help these girls in High School is JROTC. It provides an alternate source of values to the TV and the street. Something to consider if this is a problem in your community.

[dasboot]

dalight...

Absolutely correct. But it's the reaction to these things that can perpetuate or mitigate them. The reaction, institutionally and individually...the social zeitgeist...is perpetuating the behavior, generally.

One must often times be cruel, to be kind. Didactic 'cruelty' is dangerously out of fashion.