More Women Not Waiting For Mr. Right

CBS2CHICAGO ^ | 18 May 2006 | CBS2CHICAGO

[rzeznikj at stout]

No, what never ceases to amaze me is how raising kids with a mother and a father is somehow narrow-minded and bigoted.

I fail to see any modicum of reason in your thinking...

[little jeremiah]

If a woman really wants a child and doesn't want a husband, she shouldn't have a child.

Since when is "I want it really bad!" a good reason to do anything? So our wants and desires should dictate our actions, whether the results of fulfilling (or trying to fulfill) those desires may harm or be bad for someone else?

IOW, all those ads that say "Serve Yourself First", "You're Number One", "You Deserve It" are today's Golden Rule.

[rzeznikj at stout]

Amen to that...

[durasell]

If a woman really wants a child and doesn't want a husband, she shouldn't have a child.

Since when is "I want it really bad!" a good reason to do anything? So our wants and desires should dictate our actions, whether the results of fulfilling (or trying to fulfill) those desires may harm or be bad for someone else?

IOW, all those ads that say "Serve Yourself First", "You're Number One", "You Deserve It" are today's Golden Rule.






They should just go to the local mall and pick up one of the "free range" ones you always see wandering around...

(it's a joke, a joke)

[rzeznikj at stout]

Amen!!

Clearly, this is the result of the Clinton legacy coupled with a severe ignoring of moral decency.

Having a mother and father is a basic premise that has existed since the first creatures roamed the Earth. And it has not only served the planet, but humanity well.

Bottom line--if it ain't broken, don't try to futz with it...

[little jeremiah]

Crap. You're making (false and erroneous) judgments with every comment. Such hypocrisy! I can't "judge" but you can "judge" me and others, solely because we disagree with your hardcore feminist crap.

The internal inconsistencies of your failed philosophy are laughable.

Children do best with a mother and a father who are married to each other and live together with the child. If a woman wants a child and doesn't want to have a husband, and is condemning her child to be fatherless, this is a singularly selfish and wanton act.

[GOP_Raider]

Mow a lawn you lazy POS.

I had a few coworkers who donated to sperm banks while they were in college, and judging by some of their other antics, it's not a surprise.

[rintense]

PHEW! I just wanted to check. I had to ask because I know there are those would propose what you said.

[papertyger]

I just get very indignant with the absolutists that tend to post on these type threads who refuse to see that there are no absolutes.

I personally don't believe others are being as absolutist as you do, and I'm sure you've been freeping long enough to know your statement regarding absolutists is absolutist in itself ;o)

While I recognize there are exceptions to rules, it is irresponsible to ignore the "rules" wholesale. I would also council a single, pregnant, rape victim to put the child up for adoption apart from extraordinary mitigating circumstances such as engagement, or vast personal resources.

My brother turned out the be an extraordinarily successful, family man, but that is in no small part due to his upbringing by a "greatest generation" family.

In my own life, as a waiting adoptive parent, I have quite a bit of contact with others who have adopted in similar circumstances, and I am continually amazed by the children I see. They are better behaved and outwardly happier and more secure than any other group of children I have ever seen...bar none. I can only attribute such uniformity of outcome to the extremely rigid vetting process done on us before we are permitted to adopt from our children's country of birth.

Trust me on this: once you see the results of children raised in "nuclear families" and you KNOW there are no family skeletons or pathologies, you gain a new appreciation for the traditional model.

[marajade]

"No, what never ceases to amaze me is how raising kids with a mother and a father is somehow narrow-minded and bigoted."

I never said that.

[little jeremiah]

I can't believe the feminist moral relativist garbage people are sucking down. And spewing out. Moral relativists are the most hardcore of absolutists - they cry out against "judgementalism" while judging those who disagree with them in the harshest terms. Unbelievable that they can't see that their own beliefs cancel each other out. They only see what they want to see, to support the worldview they cling to.

[durasell]

It has to do with the moral absolutists. They crack me up.

Personally, I like people -- at least in theory -- flaws and all. We're all flawed creatures, which is one of the things that makes us endlessly fascinating. Moral absolutists miss this point.

They are, in short, the kind of people who inspire me to show up at family gatherings in a torn suit, a 23 year old stripper, waving half a bottle of Remy around in the air.

[David Allen]

Then you're the exception, not the rule.

Kids need a father.

[after dark]

A strong, good looking, financially well off man will always be able to compete against a test tube.

These women gave up on men because either they are ugly ,and/or they are lesbians.

I will say this for them ,they are smart enough to realize that unless they have kids, they will end up lonely.

They have picked the least fun way of conceiving children.

[rzeznikj at stout]

Judging from that post and the tone of your postings on this thread, that's the impression I get--right or wrong.

Often, it's not just in the words that hit the thread, but how they come across to everyone on the thread--lurkers and posters alike.

[rintense]

But they still allow single people to adopt.

A woman who adopts a child while single makes a decision to care for a child who has no chance at the best case scenario.

Please tell me, how many of us have lived in the 'best case scenario'? You make it sound as if you do not live in the best case scenario, you should have no children what so ever. If so, you've just condemned half of freerepublic.

Tell me, would you have more sympathy for a single woman who sleeps around, gets pregnant, and keeps her child (whether or not she can financially support it) than a single woman who makes a conscious decision to have a child she knows she can support and love?

[Trajan88]

Very grim story.

Just imagine the end result if this type of baby-making continues (and increases) for a few hundred years.

Spooky.

[rintense]

Amicably. Does that include love? Or is it just a business arrangement to you? You know, children are pretty smart and know when their parents don't love each other. Would you rather a child see that?

[JamesP81]

I see nothing wrong with choosing to raise a child yourself out of wedlock.

Look, my mother tried that after my parents divorced. Take it from someone who was on the wrong end of that equation: it doesn't work. Their marriage was rocky and rough, but even that was vastly superior to them being divorced. You could not possibly imagine some of the thing that happened as a result of that.

It is by nothing less than the grace of God Himself that I turned out as good as I good did. Make no mistake, however: not having both parents in the home had a negative effect on me personally. Most people who have lived as I do don't think about it that often, thinking themselves to be mostly normal. However, when I sit down and think about it and especially when I observe the social interractions of people my age who have parents who are still married, I can very starkly see that what happened with my parents 16 years ago left me different, and (mostly) not in a better way. Living with mom and only seeing dad a couple of times a month had a profound effect on my social perceptions, most them bad, that I still deal with to this day.

I have problems with relationships. I'm into my mid-20s and I've never really seriously dated anybody. Since my parents were divorced before those kinds of things became an issue, I never had an example of a husband and wife relationship to draw on. I have no idea what I'm doing. None. It's all good and well to read a book on it but it's quite another to have seen it in action. As a result, I find myself steadily moving closer to my 30s and steadily becoming less desireable for marriage, and I realize that I could seriously be looking at lifelong singlehood. The thought is not appealing.

Do not ever be deceived by the popular culture. Do not ever be deceived by the occasional success stories. The best chance a child can have for a good life is to be raised in the home with these three elements: a) Mom, b)Dad, and c) the Lord. There is no substitute.

[rintense]

Thank you for this post.