Boys flocking to be 'ducks' (Gigolo) for China's bored housewives

Guardian ^ | May 7 2006 | Tom Miller

[wesley_windam-price]

Near the restaurant where Mao Zedong and President Nixon shared roast duck during the heady days of 'ping pong diplomacy', Beijing's new ducks strut their stuff at a popular nightspot. They are easy to pick out: in tight clothes and sunglasses, the ducks sway to the beat and scan the seething dance floor. For many Chinese women, male prostitutes - yazi, or 'ducks', after their female equivalents ji, or chicken - are an increasingly essential part of a girls' night out. Xiao Yu, a prostitute in his twenties who sports a tight red T-shirt with aviators atop spiked hair, is agitated: 'I really can't talk. This is working time.' Xu Wen, his pimp, runs a tight ship, roaming the club, checking on his boys, ensuring that the women in the private rooms at the back are happy. 'Women pay,' he says, 'to buy a duck for a few hours of chatting, drinking and flirting. If they then want to rent a hotel room for the night, the price rises.' All the yazi in the nightclub earn as much as seven times the city's average wage.

[wesley_windam-price]

'When they [ducks] get to have sex with a beautiful girl, they are excited,' says Xu. 'But often it's old and unattractive women, which they find pretty disgusting.' Xiao Yu is more sanguine: 'It's not that bad. It's just a job.

Of course, the women who pay for gigilos are old and ugly otherwise they wouldn't have to pay!

[xcamel]

These stories just quack me up.

[Battle Axe]

No wonder BIRD FLU originated in China.

[steveo]

I'm down with you on that. Did the story ever mention what the bill was?

[sgtbono2002]

I never realised Chinese women were that hard up.

If Helen Thomas goes over I would imagine a lot of Chinese boy prostitutes would hang up their spurs.

[Savage Beast]

I always hate to be the one to crash a jolly illusion, but there are some nasty, disease-causing microorganisms flying around out there that are hard to duck.

[relictele]

I'm sure the men-seeking-boys trade is more robust and profitable, but China wouldn't allow coverage of it and the Guardian wouldn't print it anyway.

[daviddennis]

Funny!

She describes how the first time she took a duck home they chatted, listened to music and showered before getting into bed. 'I wouldn't say he was a particularly skilled lover - just average, nothing special.'

Why do it if it's not special?

Odd.

D

[jslade]

Gigilo John Skerry is taking notes.

[wesley_windam-price]

She describes how the first time she took a duck home they chatted, listened to music and showered before getting into bed. 'I wouldn't say he was a particularly skilled lover - just average, nothing special.'

Why do it if it's not special?

Answer is pretty obvious. She ain't getting it at home.

[TheOracleAtLilac]

and on an unrelated thread...

HEADLINE: Al Gore Ducks Hillary Question

[cripplecreek]

Well that was just fowl.

[elmer fudd]

Why do it if it's not special?

I've done it plenty of times when it was nothing special. More to the point: why PAY for it if it's not special? You'd think the cold hard renminbi's would get you something.

[adorno]

'But often it's old and unattractive women, which they find pretty disgusting.' Xiao Yu is more sanguine: 'It's not that bad. It's just a job.'

Well, if it's a job that the Chinese don't like or won't do, then the obvious answer is the illegal aliens from Mexico. They'll do the jobs that the citizens of America won't do, so why not the Chinese jobs? How can we redirect them towards China?

[GSlob]

Maybe it should be seen in light of existing [and looming to the much greater extent] gender imbalance in China.

[DogBarkTree]

I doubt even a duck would do Helen. Not for a couple of bucks anyway.

[lowbridge]

Fred Garvin, Male Prostitute

Mrs. Potter.....Margot Kidder
Fred Garvin.....Dan Aykroyd
Slick.....Garrett Morris


[ open on Mrs. Potter lying in bed in hotel room, as a knock is heard at the door ]

Mrs. Potter: I'm coming, I'm coming.. [ opens door ] Hello?

Fred Garvin: [ entering ] Mrs. Potter?

Mrs. Potter: Yes.. that's me.

Fred Garvin: The same Mrs. Potter who's Vice-President, in charge of loans for the Franklin National Bank in Chicago.

Mrs. Potter: Yeah, that's me.

Fred Garvin: Here, this is for you.

Mrs. Potter: Oh, thank you. Thank you very much.

Fred Garvin: May I come in?

Mrs. Potter: What for?

Fred Garvin: Well, ma'am, you see, when a VP like yourself comes to Milain to do business, it's customary for the company to send a gal up to the room, compliments of Great Lakes Feed & Grain. And, well.. since you're a gal, the company sent me - Fred Garvin, Male Prostitute.

[ Fred stares at the camera as the title card appears ]

Mrs. Potter: Uh.. I don't, I don't think you understand, Fred. I'm not that kind of girl..

Fred Garvin: Oh, let me reassure you, ma'am. I can assure you profssional hygeine, discretion and animal gratification.

Mrs. Potter: I have never had to pay for that in my whole life.

Fred Garvin: Well, don't worry about it. Great Lakes Feed & Grain is picking up the tab. You get me for the whole night!

Mrs. Potter: Hey, uh..

Fred Garvin: Hey is for horses, young lady. No ifs, ands or buts about it - you're spending the night with Fred Garvin, Male Prostitute.

[ Fred stares at the camera as the title card appears ]

Well, now, I have a work order here which specifies that I am to roger you roundly 'til 6:15 tomorrow morning.

Mrs. Potter: Now, wait a minute.. wait a minute. Don't I get dome say in this? I mean, maybe I want some sleep. Maybe I don't want to be rogered roundly.

Fred Garvin: Ma'am, you're dealing here with a fully qualified male strumpet. I service the entire quad cities area - Moline, Rock Island, Davenport and Bettendorf. Why don't you give it a whirl? What have you got to lose?

Mrs. Potter: [ walks aside to think to herself ] What do I have to lose? No one's ever gonna know.. and I'm not gonna see Paul for another couple of weeks. Sure, Fred's not the most attractive guy in the world.. but if he makes a living at this, he must be doing something right. [ finished thinking ] Okay, Mr. Garvin. I'll try it.

Fred Garvin: Congratulations, Mrs. Potter! I knew you'd come to your sense. And, ma'am, if you're amenable, I'd like to begin the session by striking a few.. seductive poses. [ makes series of odd, comic poses ]

Mrs. Potter: That's nice..

Fred Garvin: I call this one "The Snake". [ poses like a snake ]

Mrs. Potter: Uh.. well, I'm, uh..

Fred Garvin: Mrs. Potter, please cooperate. Come on, now, come on. You'll thank yourself later, now come on. Get on under this bed here, young lady, come on, come on. Just jump right on in here.

Mrs. Potter: Okay. [ jumps in ]

Fred Garvin: Now, if you don't mind, I do work with the glasses and jacket. [ climbs in ] Feeling anything yet? Any symptoms of arousal?

Mrs. Potter: I don't think so.

Fred Garvin: Well, these things take time. Perhaps a bit of humor will break the ice. What's red and green, and goes like this? [ makes spinning motion ]

Mrs. Potter: I don't know.

Fred Garvin: A frog in a blender! There you go. And now, look at this. [ holds up card ]

Mrs. Potter: What's this?

Fred Garvin: My backseat driver's license! [ laughs ] Enough foreplay - let's get cracking. [ removes pants ]

Mrs. Potter: [ notices something ] Hey, wait a minute..

Fred Garvin: What?

Mrs. Potter: What is all that stuff?

Fred Garvin: Oh, uh.. that's my rather elaborate network of trusses. I will need your help with a couple of these. I got the old hernia truss here.. and I got a spleen truss, it opens up with a couple of snaps here in the back..

Mrs. Potter: No, I don't think so.. you know, I.. I.. I think this is a little too much for me, I, uh..

Fred Garvin: No, no.. it's just a couple of snaps in the back. You know, you just gotta make sure you don't touch the rupture, that's all..

[ a knock at the door ]

Mrs. Potter: Who's that? Who's that?

Slick: It's Slick.

Mrs. Potter: Who's Slick?

Fred Garvin: Uh.. Slick. This takes a little explanation. You see.. Slick is a gentleman of leisure. He looks out for me and the girls. Uh.. be there in a jiffy, Slick! By the way, one good word from you would really put me in good with the boss.

Mrs. Potter: Okay.

Fred Garvin: [ opens door ] Hey, Slick!

Slick: [ enters, dressed a pimp ] There's my main man! I was down in the hallway, I thought you mind need some help with your trusses, baby.

Mrs. Potter: Oh, no, we don't need any help with his trusses. In fact, I think maybe you'd both better get out of here.

Slick: What's the matter, Miss? Hasn't Fred attended to your needs?

Mrs. Potter: Oh, no.. he's really attended to my needs.. [ Fred signals her ] He was wonderful! The earth moved! In fact, it moved so muich, I don't think I can take any more!

Slick: [ laughs ] That's my Fred! Yeah. He's my bread-and-butter man. You see, in my schedule I got eight girls, and Fred. Come on, Fred, let's go, man. They got some hungry women in Beddendorf waiting for the Garden Lizard.

Mrs. Potter: Fred? Fred? Fred, I just want to thank you for tonight. I'm never going to forget it.

Fred Garvin: Well, thank you, ma'am. I do what I can. Because I'm Fred Garvin, Male Prostitute.

[ Fred stares at the camera as the title card appears ]

[ fade to black ]

[mikrofon]

Job opportunities for Americans?

[DTogo]

Better think twice when ordering Peking Duck in China next time.

[TEEHEE]

AFRAC!