Bye-bye baby (Childfree and Loving It)

Telegraph ^ | February 26, 2006 | Julia Llewellyn Smith

[bella1]

Here in the U.S., there seems to be a trend amoung the younger generation to have more children. This is indeed good news. I myself fell into the belief that it is better to have a small family. I have two children. Now, at age 47 I regret that decision. I wish I would have had more. But I am heartened that the younger generation are having three and four children and are also returning to their Christian roots more than their parents. I for one am encouraging my children to have more than just two. Family is the most important thing; not jobs, homes, vacations, toys etc. On another encouraging note, here in the U.S., the conservative women have more children than their liberal counteparts; this is a win-win situation.

P.S. Islam and behavior are not always compatible.

[MaDeuce]

Sorry Cincinatus,

Your post was the last one and I just clicked on it cause I had to post fast before getting ready for work.

I myself get steamed by people saying "why don't you have kids". Its like "why do the Hell do I have to explain it to you" is my additude when asked this or read story about this.

[Warren_Piece]

Your post is so over the top, I struggled with whether or not to reply, thinking I'd be made a fool of if it were a joke. I've decided to take that risk.

You obviously are not a Christian, because your point of view about God and eternity more closely mirrors the Judaic or Muslim point of view.

You were not made to languish in misery and self-pity. You were not fashioned to be racked with guilt, or struggle with pain. You were not born to always struggle, never rest.

You were born to fly! You were made to run in Lofty circles, to sit at the table with the Highest and Mightiest.

And as my grandma would say, you are not ugly, because "God don't do ugly". Even in your post, I see a good heart, a kind spirit that is simply broken. As we all are.

You don't have to follow any set of rules to spend eternity in Heaven - just accept the real "gift". That's it. I hope you find out more about the gift. Many here will help you find it.

[arizonarachel]

What a cute baby! I want to pinch his little face. :-)

[arizonarachel]

I must be completely honest here - I once thought of myself as one of those people (and so did my husband.) We decided that we were never having children because they were messy, annoying, and would wreck our relationship and all our nice expensive stuff (and house.)

Then something amazing happened...God blessed us with a pregnancy. After the intial shock and fear, we both fell in love with who we thought would be our little boy, Nicholas Christopher. One month after we found out about him, I had a miscarriage and he was gone. He will forever be in our hearts as the child who changed our minds about having children - now I can't wait to have one.

I'm not saying everyone would feel the same way we did..my husband and I are Christians, and would never even think to end a pregnancy out of our own power. I have a feeling the majority of these women in the article don't believe in God or Jesus, and would not have a problem terminating their pregnancy. Actually, when I considered myself 'childfree,' women on a website would refer to their accidental pregnancies as 'parasites.' I could never do that myself, but for some women, that's what they are.

I have never felt love for another person like I felt for Nicholas, and I can't wait until I can hold a baby that's both a part of myself and my husband.

Never say never. :-)

[Gritty]

These self-centered navel gazers are stuck on one note, me-me-me!

It's probably good these hedonists are not having children. The kids would be neglected and abused.

[Puddleglum]

Translation - let someone else's kid pay outrageous taxes to support me when I'm old and miserable.

[ElTianti]

Matthew 7:13-14 (King James Version)
13Enter ye in at the strait gate: for wide is the gate, and broad is the way, that leadeth to destruction, and many there be which go in thereat:

14Because strait is the gate, and narrow is the way, which leadeth unto life, and few there be that find it.

http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Matthew%207:13-14&version=9;

[TheDon]

Illegals in the US, as opposed to those in Europe, are not going to bring Sharia law in a few decades.

[Paulus]

You don't know that... I could easily say that in a few decads you all will be slaves for the MS13 illegals.

[Atlas Sneezed]

Folks, if child rearing is so great, people will naturally choose it. Four out of five generally do.

But what is annoying is that the pro-child folks can't be content with their choice. They seem prone to call those who opt not: "selfish", when they are similarly making their own choice of what they want most for themselves for their lives.

And when it comes to self-absorption, one could make a case that generating a mini-replica to carry on one's legacy after you are gone ranks pretty high.

Finally, let's lose the moronic notion that the desire to have children is genetically heritable. The occasional urge not to breed will not be bred out of the race. Anyone who hypothesizes otherwise may start by explaining the ongoing existence of homosexuality throughout human existence.

[Atlas Sneezed]

You think that people who are disinclined to reproduce should do so anyway to fight your political or religious battles?

[Atlas Sneezed]

So people who choose a different alternative than you are "immature"? Hmmm.

[Atlas Sneezed]

Wouldn't you like to see the women quoted in the article repeat their statements while hooked to a polygraph...I suspect that a large part of it is crapola, er..phony justification..

---

If they disagree with your life choices, then they must be lying? Hmmm....

[Atlas Sneezed]

I think she may regret it in a few years when she can no longer have the choice to have her own children.

---

Mrs. B. (whose preference not to have children I share) has asked all the older women among her friends and family who do not have children if they regret it. Most say no, one says, "a little, sometimes". Lots of the ladies who have had children have profound regrets about that choice.

[Old_Mil]

She is a 46 year old orthodontist who hates children. She fulfills any needs by having relatives with children come visit her then she sends them home. I think she may regret it in a few years when she can no longer have the choice to have her own children.

She may not have realized it yet, but she's already several years past that point. The rate of birth defects in children born to a 46 year old woman vs. a 26 year old woman is astronomically high. That is a figure which begins to creep upward at 35.

[Atlas Sneezed]

We have made similar choices, but would probably feel the same if fate affected us as it did you.

[Antoninus]

Bye-bye baby (Childfree and Loving It)

I say, Bye-bye Britain. Hello Londonistan.

If the Brits won't reproduce, you can bet their Muslim friends already living there will more than make up for them.

[Campion]

And when it comes to self-absorption, one could make a case that generating a mini-replica to carry on one's legacy after you are gone ranks pretty high

I doubt very much you're a parent, or you wouldn't make such a ridiculous statement.

A society in which a significant number of people decide that reproduction is "optional," and an "option" they can do without, is doomed. That's not even debatable, unless you like to argue with mathematics. (Hint: mathematics always wins.)

That's why we call it selfish. It is selfish; it's eating your economic seed corn today so you can get good and fat, never mind the fact that there will be nothing to plant in the spring and you will starve next winter.

For a time, a society can artificially prop up its standard of living by refusing to bear, feed, raise and educate the next generation. But that only lasts so long, doesn't it.

Folks, if child rearing is so great, people will naturally choose it. Four out of five generally do.

The fertility rates in Spain, Italy, and Japan are something like 1.2 kids per woman, and going down. You do the math. 2.1 kids per woman is required just to replace the population.

[Antoninus]

Surveys show that people who choose not to have children (as opposed to those who desperately want them, but can't) tend to have better marriages, better finances and are no more likely to be unhappy in old age than parents.

I'd reckon they're also much more likely to lie in order to justify their foolish youthful decision. I'd be willing to bet that they are also: more likely to seek psychiatric help at some point in their life; more likely to commit suicide; more likely to be in a nursing home at an earlier age.