[dfwgator]

I think this would get their attention:

[proud_yank]

Good thinking!

[Issaquahking]

18" bars are for sissies. This would get MY attention!!!




I GOTTA FIND A WOMAN WITH A CHAINSAW
(Peter Krug)

I woke up this mornin' frozen nearly dead,
Was so damn cold I couldn't get out of bed.
As I lay there shiverin' as cold as can be.
Suddenly this revelation occurred to me.

CHO:
I gotta find a woman with a chainsaw,
To spend the winter with me.
If I could find a woman with a chainsaw,
Than all night long I would stoke her fire, yes indeed.

I put an ad down at the Co-op, a notice on the stump,
I don't care if she's skinny, I don't care if she's plump,
I don't care if she's pretty or ugly as sin,
If she's got a chainsaw she can move right in.

Oh, you big city women in your Calvin Klein clothes,
Ain't much good when the ground gets froze.
I need a tough country mama, to help me chop my wood,
And when I find her, I'm gonna treat her good.

I 'd treat her sweet and gentle and we would never fight,
If she went out with someone else I wouldn't get uptight.
She can just do her thing, and I can do just mine,
And she and me and that machine we'd get along just fine.

I've got a cabin in the mountain, a Chevy pickup truck,
With half a ton of Mendocino thunder f**k,
I've got a bushel of soy beans, a whole barrel of brown rice,
And a couple cords of firewood would make it all so very nice.