A VERY ANGST-RIDDEN MOVIE REVIEW (KING KONG) - DID I MENTION *FUNNY REVIEW*? GUT-BUSTINGLY FUNNY?

A VERY, VERRY, VERRRRRY, BEAUTIFUL, (BUT TWISTED?) MIND ^ | TODAY | A VERY BRILLIANT MOVIE REVIEWER

[ABG(anybody but Gore)]

It doesn't have to be that much of a waste of time. You can have it on in the background. Do housework. Yuk it up with your friends about how bad the movie is, in a way you can't in a theater without being impolite.

If MST3K ever spoofs it, I'll buy that DVD, otherwise, I'm gonna pass.

[Psycho_Bunny]

Please. If someone goes to this movie sober, and doesn' assume it's going to suck, they got conned.

[TomGuy]

Most of this analysis is correct.

On the boat, it seemed a subplot with the cabin boy's history (being found afloat with an arm broken in 2 places, etc.) was developing, and it was not in the 1933 version. But that got lost somewhere in all the other muck of the film. That was one example of muck that increased the length of the film without adding anything to the over move.

The movie really began to fall apart with the appearance of the natives on the island and went, disappointingly, downward from there.

Every action seemed to be based on a philosophy: If 5 minutes of this action are good, 15 minutes are better.

Outracing the brontasori was laughable. Ann dancing and twirling on the ledge for Kong was ridiculous.

The downhill slide of the movie continued right to the end.

[js1138]

Let's hope Jackson's DVD gives some credit to the real original.

Gorilla Hunt - 1926

Gorilla Hunt - 1926

[Carlucci]

I thought the scene where Ann is juggling to amuse Kong was terrible. She takes her eyes completely off the rocks for several seconds.

[dangus]

Movies have to have an internal consistency for our belief to be suspended. I just laughed off the Kong-does-Bruce-Lee stuff early in the movie, but -- and I know this sounds wierd -- I actually had a hard time recognizing that the ape was being killed by the bullets. When I didn't see any blood, I thought it was like when he was being chomped on by the dinosaurs. That would have ruined the suspense for me, if I hadn't had a mild case of vertigo. And after getting NEAR the ape was so mind-bogglingly treacherous, the the actual arrival at the ape, and escape there from seemed all too easy.

The movie was ridiculous. One might say it was saved by being ridiculously ridiculous: it was so ridiculous that I quit caring that it was ridiculous. The reviewer hardly mentions the fact that the lead female's spine would have turned to mush by the abuse she receives from the ape when he first steals her away. Frankly, there is the most preposterous but when the movie becomes incoherent, then I criticize.

Incidentally, I also could not believe the movie was not rated 'R.' Way, way, WAAAAAYYYY over the line with some of the violence and yuck... such as a lengthy, graphic depiction of people being eaten alive by bugs.

On the other hand, what the movie had to say about human relations was great, and, like the reviewer said, the "slower" parts were purely enjoyable.

[dangus]

Btw, I didn't mention it in my first post, because I didn't want to spoil it, but then I saw that the reviewer did mention it: I thought the ice-skating routine was brilliant. Hysterical, preposterous, but brilliant.

[SuziQ]

You were expecting realism?

[Guenevere]

Seriously, you need to get a life!

I saw this movie yesterday and enjoyed it exceedingly!

It's a popcorn movie....OK.....

...it plays as it is....

..and I was easily able to suspend deep analysis of every single moment!.....I suggest you should also.

Enjoy it....or not.
It's only your opinion afterall.

[Mathews]

.30 Cal Thompson OR .45 Cal Thompson? Don't recall ever hearing about .30 Cal Thompsons.

[Al Simmons]

"cluster***k" is a military metaphor much like SNAFU. It basically means something that is totally messed up.

[Rocko]

WHEW!!!!!!!!!!!!! Anybody think of anything I left out???

How 'bout...

What tribe would send a little girl to bait a band of armed strangers?

[Al Simmons]

C'mon dude. You can AT LEAST tell me my screed was inspired (and hopefully funny).

Don't be a stuffed shirt.

P.S. I was 21 when I saw E.T., and yes, I thought it sucked. A typically shallow Spielberg movie (and from the reviews I've seen of "Munich", not much has changed in that regard since 1982. But no, I won't waste 1 cent to see that piece of terrorist-glorifying trash).

[najida]

In these movies I always root for the animal...
Kong, Godzilla, Creature From the Black Lagoon.

I'm always miffed and disappointed with the endings.

[Al Simmons]

Yes, I got the caliber of the machine guns wrong. (It was 3 AM - whaddidja expect??) ;-)

[willk]

Sorry, but I thought this movie was great fun to watch. For those who are planning on waiting for the DVD.. DON'T!! This needs to be seen on the big screen.

[daisyscarlett]

I liked the movie...it did not seem like it was 3+ hours and I was so enthralled I did not even take a potty break, and judging by the long lines in the Ladie's Room after the movie, no one else did either.

BTW, Peter King did spend a lot of time editing this movie; he lost 70 lbs, in fact, during the process (ate yogurt etc instead of fast food in the editing room)

[Guenevere]

Peter Jackson :) ...did lose a lot of weight, but I heard he ate lots of soup :)

Yogurt, soup.....it worked.

[daisyscarlett]

I meant Peter Jackson not Peter King, duh...can't get politics out of my mind. Speaking of politics, this movie was completely apolitical, which is another reason I liked it.

[Xenalyte]

Or the young cabin boy . . . takes another .30 caliber Thompson's Sub-Machine Gun

I think you're being too harsh here. Clearly, this guy is a young Roland, who would later end up headless and immortalized in a Zevon song.