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A VERY ANGST-RIDDEN MOVIE REVIEW (KING KONG) - DID I MENTION *FUNNY REVIEW*? GUT-BUSTINGLY FUNNY?
A VERY, VERRY, VERRRRRY, BEAUTIFUL, (BUT TWISTED?) MIND ^ | TODAY | A VERY BRILLIANT MOVIE REVIEWER

Posted on 12/28/2005 3:36:50 AM PST by Al Simmons

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To: Al Simmons

Sorry, I've seen it. I loved it. I watched the movie for the fun of watching another Kong. Jackson did a bangup job IMO. I remember the fights a little differently between the dinos and Kong. As for the Bronto stampede, sure, people will die and people will live. That's kinda the point. You ever been in a bronto stampede? The weight of brontos is estimated because nobody really knows - all they can do is guess. And I very much doubt they were running at 30 - 40 mph given that the people were keeping up - kindof a giveaway. Methinks you bought into your own hype a bit too much.

As much as you like picking, you have a few good points piled onto by a bunch of apparently inaccurate observations that you take poetic license with.

Kong is a good flick. It's the most realistic portrayal of a great ape on screen to date IMO. Despite it's length, it kept attention, and didn't dissappoint. I don't even know what Halo is; but, I'm ready to go see it if Jackson handles it with the attention paid to Kong and the Rings. The man has become genuinely successful at what he does because he's good at it and has hired help that is good at it. We seem to have seen two different movies.


21 posted on 12/28/2005 4:30:33 AM PST by Havoc (President George and King George.. coincidence?)
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To: Al Simmons

Here's the latest on BB Mountain.....

http://exposingtheleft.blogspot.com/2005/12/minimal-appeal.html


22 posted on 12/28/2005 4:50:02 AM PST by traderrob6
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To: Al Simmons

CGI has pretty much thrown open the gates for excess. Very very little CGI has a reality to it any more, and it seems to take video games as it's template of reality-- SFX are becoming less convincing, lately, not more (George Lucas, call your office).


23 posted on 12/28/2005 4:55:21 AM PST by atomicpossum (Replies should be as pedantic as possible. I love that so much.)
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To: Al Simmons
with the laws of gravity and physics apparently being permanently suspended

I've always hated it when a movie disregards the need to "qualify" what happens in a film (goes for books too). It becomes so distracting that I can't pay attention to the story. I have always called it "poetic liscence", but that doesn't really fit the case.

24 posted on 12/28/2005 5:00:47 AM PST by REPANDPROUDOFIT
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To: Al Simmons

BTW, what a great post!


25 posted on 12/28/2005 5:01:32 AM PST by REPANDPROUDOFIT
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To: Al Simmons
5. The GD-MF-ing "emotional involvement" between Ann and the beast "cluster***k" - well, you know what I mean there ;-)

So, your not into beastiality?
26 posted on 12/28/2005 5:11:26 AM PST by wolfcreek
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To: Al Simmons

I loved the film.


27 posted on 12/28/2005 5:13:43 AM PST by RogueIsland
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To: Al Simmons
I had many of the same issues. How do the natives survive on a cliff and where did they go after they offer the girl up to Kong? How does Ann survive the brutal tossing around she gets on a regular basis? When kong first gets her, he stands on a ledge and shakes her up and down like 20 times for no apparent reason. If not breaking her spine, she should have at least barfed. The carbon-nanotube vines were too much as well.

On and on. I can enjoy it for the action part of it, but those suspended physics and other issues keep popping up while you're watching it. I mean, you're in a dino stampede for 10 minutes and only a few people get squished? Yeah, right.

28 posted on 12/28/2005 5:17:26 AM PST by Malsua
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To: Al Simmons

Saw it. Someone should have held a gun to Peter Jackson's head and kept it there till he cut a full hour from this movie. At 2 hrs 17 min, we'd be talking about a breathtaking masterpiece.

Show a couple of skulls and skeletons, not 50. One eye-rolling native, not a full minute of them. 10-20 long close-ups of Naomi Watts, not 648. One good close-up of the biplanes, not 20.

And cut the whole dino stampede scene. It was dumb, and quite frankly, the effects sucked.

I could go on and on, like the movie.


29 posted on 12/28/2005 5:20:02 AM PST by Jhensy
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To: Al Simmons

This reminds me of the Indiana Jones series.

The first movie depicted incredibly "unlikely" feats, but never crossed the line into fantasy. Thus it kept the audience riveted to the action.

The subsequent movies crossed the line and lost the edge that the first one had.


30 posted on 12/28/2005 5:21:51 AM PST by SampleMan
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To: Al Simmons

This reminds me of the Indiana Jones series.

The first movie depicted incredibly "unlikely" feats, but never crossed the line into fantasy. Thus it kept the audience riveted to the action.

The subsequent movies crossed the line and lost the edge that the first one had.


31 posted on 12/28/2005 5:25:47 AM PST by SampleMan
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To: Al Simmons
Next, lets examine the truly amazing special effects of Ann being carried every which way by Kong. OK. Now a couple of questions? How come her ribs didn't fracture? How come her neck didn't snap from the whiplash or from being slammed into tree branches along the way? Her narrow escapes from the mouths of the various V-Rexes speak for themselves.

I was wondering about that myself...The way Kong was carrying her, she'd either be dead froma broken neck or severely brain-damaged.

Oh, and has Mr. Peter Jackson ever been outside on the observation deck of the Empire State Building? Well, I (and probably half his US audience) have been there. And, besides the dizzying fear of heights, there is also something known as THE WIND that ALWAYS is whipping around up there like a gale. Still, never saw Ann's clothes flap, never heard any wind, and she and Driscoll hopped up and down those exterior ladders 100 stories up in the air like, like, well - like there was a net and a blue screen below them, onto which NYC was later super-imposed.

It's winter. There's snow on the ground. She's up there where it must be even colder, in a skimpy dress and HIGH HEELS climbing on the ladders. That was undoubtedly the very stupidest part of the film-never mind the wind, the hypothermia'd get her. And when she leaves the safety of the deck to climb up those slippery metal ladders IN HIGH HEELS I heard people in the audience saying "Idiot!" and less polite words.

32 posted on 12/28/2005 5:26:18 AM PST by kaylar
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To: Deb

Shall we spank him, mum?


33 posted on 12/28/2005 5:33:39 AM PST by AppyPappy (If you aren't part of the solution, there is good money to be made prolonging the problem.)
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To: Al Simmons

If you think this is bad, you should read his review of Gilligan's Island.


34 posted on 12/28/2005 5:37:24 AM PST by AndrewB
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To: Al Simmons; Bob J

"WHEW!!!!!!!!!!!!! Anybody think of anything I left out???"

You forgot to put "it Sucked" in your thread title.


35 posted on 12/28/2005 5:43:46 AM PST by Rebelbase (Green bean casserole is a culinary curse upon mankind.)
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To: Al Simmons; grobdriver
Remember, movies are about suspending your disbelief.


That's right! Your probably the "guy", (Al Simmons, not Grobdriver) who when he saw E.T. and Eliot bicycling across the full moon in the sky and said; "I'm sure...".


I saw King Kong, and I really liked it, as it was an entertainment rollercoaster with many parts that were funny. I did not approach like some sort of "Discovery Channel Documentary".


If you are looking for realism in this fantasy tale you will be met with disapointment.


Did you have the same type of review for "Lord of the Rings" also? Not too much realism there either.
36 posted on 12/28/2005 5:45:14 AM PST by dagoofyfoot
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To: grobdriver
Remember, movies are about suspending your disbelief...

Thank You!!!

Big Al should go watch a documentary or something...sheesh...

37 posted on 12/28/2005 6:06:31 AM PST by martin gibson (I know not what course others may take, but as for myself, give me Ralph Stanley or give me death!!!)
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To: Al Simmons

Haven't seen it yet, but do any of my fellow old-time aeronuts know what type of biplanes are shown in the film? I saw the original Kong the other night, and they looked like some model of Curtiss two-seaters.


38 posted on 12/28/2005 6:07:22 AM PST by MajorityOfOne
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To: Al Simmons

i thot the 40 foot tall ape was not believable ... i don't think it really could have grown to be that tall, bone mass not being able to support its weight and all


39 posted on 12/28/2005 6:09:38 AM PST by InvisibleChurch (The search for someone to blame is always successful. - Robert Half)
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To: Al Simmons
After Field of Drams came out the film maker was accosted by a fan who wanted to complain. Shoeless Joe Jackson was right handed and Ray Liotta, who played him in the film, is a leftie.

The response was immediate. "You're right, but did you know that there's an even bigger continuity error in the film that I'm surprised you didn't notice? Shoeless Joe Jackson is DEAD! It's a movie! GET OVER IT!

The movie is about a 25 foot tall ape for cripes sake. It's not Shakespeare. Take it for what it is, a tribute to a fantastic "B" movie from 70 years ago that has stayed with us to this day, even with the crude special affects of the time. He cast Jack Black in it, for goodness sake.

40 posted on 12/28/2005 6:17:39 AM PST by Phsstpok (There are lies, damned lies, statistics and presentation graphics, in descending order of truth)
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