[bannie]

I've finally learned to balance my check book and that I am a poor judge of man-flesh.

[CzarNicky]

My ABDs

[MarineBrat]

I'VE LEARNED.......

I've learned that I like my teacher because she cries when we sing
"Silent Night". Age 6

I've learned that you can't hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of
milk. Age 7

I've learned that when I wave to people in the country, they stop what
they are doing and wave back. Age 9

I've learned that just when I get my room the way I like it, Mom makes
me clean it up. Age 13

I've learned that if you want to cheer yourself up, you should try
cheering someone else up. Age 14

I've learned that although it's hard to admit it, I'm secretly glad my
parents are strict with me. Age 15

I've learned that silent company is often more healing than words of
advice. Age 24

I've learned that brushing my child's hair is one of life's great
pleasures. Age 26

I've learned that wherever I go, the worlds worst drivers have
followed me there. Age 29

I've learned...that if someone says something unkind about me, I must
live so that no one will believe it. Age 39

I've learned that there are people who love you dearly but just don't
know how to show it. Age 41

I've learned that you can make some one's day by simply sending them a
little card. Age 44

I've learned that the greater a person's sense of guilt, the greater his
need to cast blame on others. Age 46

I've learned that children and grandparents are natural allies. Age 47

I've learned that singing "Amazing Grace" can lift my spirits for
hours. Age 49

I've learned that motel mattresses are better on the side away from the
phone. Age 50

I've learned that you can tell a lot about a man by the way he handles
these three things: a rainy day, lost luggage, and tangled Christmas
tree lights. Age 52

I've learned that keeping a vegetable garden is worth a medicine
cabinet full of pills. Age 52

I've learned that regardless of your relationship with your parents, you
miss them terribly after they die. Age 53

I've learned that making a living is not the same thing as making a
life. Age 58

I've learned that if you want to do something positive for your
children, try to improve your marriage. Age 61

I've learned that life sometimes gives you a second chance. Age 62

I've learned that you shouldn't go through life with a catchers mitt on
both hands. You need to be able to throw something back. Age 64

I've learned that if you pursue happiness, it will elude you. But if
you focus on your family, the needs of others, your work, meeting new
people, and doing the very best you can, happiness will find you. Age
65

I've learned that whenever I decide something with kindness, I usually
make the right decision. Age 66

I've learned that everyone can use a prayer. Age 72

I've learned that it pays to believe in miracles. And to tell the
truth, I've seen several. Age 73

I've learned that even when I have pains, I don't have to be one. Age
82

I've learned that every day you should reach out and touch someone.
People love that human touch--holding hands, a warm hug, or just a
friendly pat on the back. Age 85

I've learned that I still have a lot to learn. Age 92

[JoeSixPack1]

Old enough to know better assumes too much.
Hot water is on the left.
Shoes come in pairs.
A pair of jeans only covers half your body.
Frank Sinatra was right. About everything!
You can't pick your relatives, but you can ignor them.
If you want to drink all day you have to start early.
Dogs have a master, Cats have a staff.

[Ronin]

It is possible to eat five jalapeno peppers in a row during a tequila party with friends -- but the worst is yet to come.

[AZ_Cowboy]

No matter how dumb an idea might be, someone is bound to support it.

Traditions are worth standing up for.

Never be ashamed of where you came from, as it makes you who you are whether you like it or not.

Be sure to spend time outside every day and count your blessings.

Stay away from the bottle as much as is humanly possible.

Never use your credentials as a club against another, because they are undoubtedly better at something than you are.

Always, always, have a backup plan.

[wildcatf4f3]

so, uh, whadaya doing after the show darlin?

[Republican Wildcat]

Ask me again in a year...

[gogogodzilla]

I have learned ALL!

I am now the ALL-knowing one!

For I know that ALL is a three letter word consisting of the letters A-L-L, meaning everything (or everyone).

:-)

[tortoise]

From the notebooks of tortoise:

The human race is a cowardly one. Suppress your fear and people will marvel at the things you achieve, and never understand how you achieved it.

Discipline finishes what genetics start.

No judgement of a person based on their appearance survives a decade. Either time or familiarity will blind you to the truth -- which truth one is blind to depends on the character of the observer.

A man unwilling to defend his own life has nothing worth living for. Association with such people is generally dangerous.

A foolish man thinks money buys happiness. A wise man knows that money buys freedom.

Humans are shackled by their own minds. As a corollary, these shackles are weak and easily broken.

Good wine is a bandage for the soul. As with most bandages, a fresh application once a day provides the best results.

[yankeedame]

What have you learned in the last 25 years?

That life is what happens when you're making other plans.

[Mr Ramsbotham]

I've learned that most of the fun in traveling is getting there.

[mouse_35]

Never, ever, ever, ever let a Democrat near a foreign policy decision.

[Dallas59]

That my Mother and Father were RIGHT!

[JoeSixPack1]

Measure twice, cut once. :-)

[Manic_Episode]

That Jesus is Lord, and that fun and happiness are two very seperate things.

[EternalVigilance]

That telling your loved ones 'I love you' pays off...


That those who deny God can't be relied on for much of anything important...


That evolutionists can never under any circumstace countenance any challenge to their particular brand of religious dogma...


That some human beings have funny ideas about just how long 'forever' is...


That while my burdens are far too heavy for me to bear, they are not too heavy for the Lord...


That no matter how much trouble kids might be, they are worth every bit of it and then some...


That, in the final analysis, the only things that really matter in this world are people and principles...

[de Buillion]

Engage your oldest relatives asap, while they are still lucid. Learn everything that they have to tell you about your own heiritage.

[wizardoz]

I'm getting better at keeping my mouth shut. But it's going to take another 10 years or so for me to really raise it to an art form.

[WhiteGuy]

They all lie, and they lie all the time.

[real saxophonist]

The Democrat Party is the largest 'hate group' in the country.

What do you mean by 'man-flesh'? Is that something from 'Videodrome'? 8~)